Jason Ellis
👤 SpeakerAppearances Over Time
Podcast Appearances
I swear to God, I felt like my mom was up there.
I have one question.
We can all agree there's a homeless epidemic.
Hey, keep talking about your trauma.
We'll think of more puns.
So I had a colonoscopy recently.
And, you know, there's really not a whole lot that's pleasant about being molested by WALL-E.
You know, and what's even worse than that is like the whole process to get ready for it.
Like you gotta fast with a liquid diet for 24 hours and drink a whole gallon of this crap that I can only describe as Satan's jizz.
Like holy Jesus balls, Batman.
That stuff is so bad that they even tell you to mix it with like some sweet tea or some Crystal Light or something.
So I did, I mixed it with some Crystal Light.
You know what it tasted like?
Tasted like Satan jizzed inside some raspberry lemonade.
On a positive note, though, I did like that Sleepy Tom cocktail that they gave me.
That shit will make you not give a fuck, man.