Michelle Ryan

He really and truly set the bar high.

To say that I miss him every day would be an understatement.

I miss the phone calls.

The 20 phone calls every day could be about nothing.

And then there'd be text messages in between.

It was the start of a new torment for us.

I always say, and even 15 years nearly down the road, I always say that if Daddy was to come back to this earth for one day, he wouldn't recognize the shelly that he left.

It was like learning how to walk again.

Well, in a nutshell, it was the day that the rug was pulled out from underneath our feet and the normal life of what we knew wasn't there anymore.

No, no.

I can't speak for people that have lost parents through natural causes or they might have been expecting or whatever that they got to say goodbye.

But for us, it was none of that.

It was the 3rd of June.

Daddy didn't show up to work.

Alarm bells started ringing and there was panic, distraught, a black hole that we couldn't, no matter what we'd done, we could not find our way out of it.

We knew something had happened and essentially it was a case of finding him.

The morning of the 4th of June, we knew that when Daddy hadn't made contact that

If we ever got him back, he wouldn't be able to talk to us again.

That was the reality for us.

The 3rd of June 2011 is a day I think that we'll walk for the rest of our lives.