Cory Muscara
👤 PersonPodcast Appearances
think as you start to realize what a gift this life is, you realize to the degree we've been unconscious for so much of it and living life through the perception of our own conditioning. So that phrasing of like, stop missing your life really resonates with me because I feel like
think as you start to realize what a gift this life is, you realize to the degree we've been unconscious for so much of it and living life through the perception of our own conditioning. So that phrasing of like, stop missing your life really resonates with me because I feel like
for many different periods of my life, I've been keenly aware of the passing of time and how aware I am and present I am during those periods and the times that I really haven't been. And it's painful to realize those times you haven't been because you see what a gift this life is. And so what comes to mind when you hear that phrasing, stop missing your life?
for many different periods of my life, I've been keenly aware of the passing of time and how aware I am and present I am during those periods and the times that I really haven't been. And it's painful to realize those times you haven't been because you see what a gift this life is. And so what comes to mind when you hear that phrasing, stop missing your life?
And why was that so kind of motivating for you?
And why was that so kind of motivating for you?
I'm looking forward to hearing what ensued afterwards. But that insight you just shared about primary and secondary pain, you know, about the
I'm looking forward to hearing what ensued afterwards. But that insight you just shared about primary and secondary pain, you know, about the
reality of having a human body that experiences things but then the recycling and multiplication of that that our mind does as you know per habit is a really liberating perspective because then we can stop being prisoners to our experience and we can actually be liberators of it and one framing that i love around this too was experience awareness and story and so i would love if you could share a couple more examples of that and how it could be
reality of having a human body that experiences things but then the recycling and multiplication of that that our mind does as you know per habit is a really liberating perspective because then we can stop being prisoners to our experience and we can actually be liberators of it and one framing that i love around this too was experience awareness and story and so i would love if you could share a couple more examples of that and how it could be
practice and practical for anybody who's listening right now that is living life that has an experience the awareness of that experience and the stories that we unconsciously or consciously continue to label on top of that and how it's important to differentiate the three yeah
practice and practical for anybody who's listening right now that is living life that has an experience the awareness of that experience and the stories that we unconsciously or consciously continue to label on top of that and how it's important to differentiate the three yeah
All great thoughts, right?
All great thoughts, right?
replacing disempowering stories with empowering ones, and then also waking up to an awareness that encompasses and will always be the background field in which any story arises, really support each other. And again, it can be easy to get sucked into one camp or the other.
replacing disempowering stories with empowering ones, and then also waking up to an awareness that encompasses and will always be the background field in which any story arises, really support each other. And again, it can be easy to get sucked into one camp or the other.
I think it's great to replace old narratives that are old conditioning passed down through culture, family, genes, whatever, with new ones. You know, I am worthy is much better than I'm not worthy in terms of your internal experience and the fruits that it's going to bear in your external reality.
I think it's great to replace old narratives that are old conditioning passed down through culture, family, genes, whatever, with new ones. You know, I am worthy is much better than I'm not worthy in terms of your internal experience and the fruits that it's going to bear in your external reality.
But even more empowering, perhaps, is to wake up to your worth that is inherent to your being beyond any story of it being
But even more empowering, perhaps, is to wake up to your worth that is inherent to your being beyond any story of it being
comparing to something externally you know whether it being i am not worthy or i am worthy and part of getting to that that point is i feel so much of creating distance from us in any story whether it's nice or not nice depending on what we think it is and that that requires practice to create distance between us and any narrative or story that are that's happening neurologically like
comparing to something externally you know whether it being i am not worthy or i am worthy and part of getting to that that point is i feel so much of creating distance from us in any story whether it's nice or not nice depending on what we think it is and that that requires practice to create distance between us and any narrative or story that are that's happening neurologically like
the reality is we're so close to our own bullshit. If we don't brush our teeth, as the saying goes, for a couple weeks, we won't really notice it because the change is so gradual and it's so close to us, we become accustomed to it, but other people can tell, right?
the reality is we're so close to our own bullshit. If we don't brush our teeth, as the saying goes, for a couple weeks, we won't really notice it because the change is so gradual and it's so close to us, we become accustomed to it, but other people can tell, right?
And so that's, I think, where it becomes really easy when you're at Thanksgiving dinner and you see all the neuroses in your family members or you're in school and you can see things and patterns that play out in other people way more easily than you can yourself. Mm-hmm. Of course, you have them too, right? As much as we don't like to admit it.
And so that's, I think, where it becomes really easy when you're at Thanksgiving dinner and you see all the neuroses in your family members or you're in school and you can see things and patterns that play out in other people way more easily than you can yourself. Mm-hmm. Of course, you have them too, right? As much as we don't like to admit it.
But it's in creating distance between us and those stories and those patterns that we begin to see them. And so... Can I... Yeah, I just wanted you to jump in here too because you talked about the jump from awareness to story. And obviously, we're practicing cultivating the awareness between the two. Yeah.
But it's in creating distance between us and those stories and those patterns that we begin to see them. And so... Can I... Yeah, I just wanted you to jump in here too because you talked about the jump from awareness to story. And obviously, we're practicing cultivating the awareness between the two. Yeah.
Mic drop.
Mic drop.
hey fam sometimes i get asked what kind of tea my guests and i are drinking on the show or what i just like to drink in general and i just wanted to give you guys a quick share because not all tea is created equally many companies are not organic leak microplastics into your tea or are just low quality sourced ingredients in general one tea brand that i have been drinking almost every day is from peak life
hey fam sometimes i get asked what kind of tea my guests and i are drinking on the show or what i just like to drink in general and i just wanted to give you guys a quick share because not all tea is created equally many companies are not organic leak microplastics into your tea or are just low quality sourced ingredients in general one tea brand that i have been drinking almost every day is from peak life
they have this puer tea which sounds very fancy and bougie and it is it's not like normal tea it's fermented which means that it's loaded with living probiotics and prebiotics that support your gut health it's like a reset button for your microbiome that supports with digestion energy metabolism and your skin peaks puer green tea and black tea which are right here
they have this puer tea which sounds very fancy and bougie and it is it's not like normal tea it's fermented which means that it's loaded with living probiotics and prebiotics that support your gut health it's like a reset button for your microbiome that supports with digestion energy metabolism and your skin peaks puer green tea and black tea which are right here
It's wild harvested from 250 year old trees. The purity is of next level. They are triple toxin screen, meaning there's no junk, no pesticides, no additives. It's just the good stuff, the stuff that you want. It dissolves instantly in hot or cold water. There's no tea bags or steeping. So the form factor I love, it's very convenient.
It's wild harvested from 250 year old trees. The purity is of next level. They are triple toxin screen, meaning there's no junk, no pesticides, no additives. It's just the good stuff, the stuff that you want. It dissolves instantly in hot or cold water. There's no tea bags or steeping. So the form factor I love, it's very convenient.
And now because you're an awesome human and you listen to this podcast, Peak is hooking you up with 20% off for life. Yes for Life. And they'll give you a free rechargeable frother and glass speaker when you grab their Pu-erh bundle, which is the black and green tea. This is an exclusive offer just for everybody who listens to this show. Peak hooks it up with a 90-day money-back guarantee.
And now because you're an awesome human and you listen to this podcast, Peak is hooking you up with 20% off for life. Yes for Life. And they'll give you a free rechargeable frother and glass speaker when you grab their Pu-erh bundle, which is the black and green tea. This is an exclusive offer just for everybody who listens to this show. Peak hooks it up with a 90-day money-back guarantee.
So that means it's risk-free. You can go to peaklife.com slash knowthyself to grab yours now. That's peaklife.com slash knowthyself. Link in bio. As always, I hope you enjoy. Man, there's so many touch points there that we can dive further into.
So that means it's risk-free. You can go to peaklife.com slash knowthyself to grab yours now. That's peaklife.com slash knowthyself. Link in bio. As always, I hope you enjoy. Man, there's so many touch points there that we can dive further into.
That last note about transcendence being, again, not something that we're in the continual acquisition of, but is the realization, which is why it's called self-realization.
That last note about transcendence being, again, not something that we're in the continual acquisition of, but is the realization, which is why it's called self-realization.
as the letting go and the undoing of those parts of us that aren't actually us, but yet we subtly or sometimes grossly believe to be ourselves, then realizes and makes space for that experience of our true nature and true self. A great book on the synthesizing of what you're talking to that people want to check out is Already Free by Bruce Tift. Oh, yeah.
as the letting go and the undoing of those parts of us that aren't actually us, but yet we subtly or sometimes grossly believe to be ourselves, then realizes and makes space for that experience of our true nature and true self. A great book on the synthesizing of what you're talking to that people want to check out is Already Free by Bruce Tift. Oh, yeah.
It's a great framework for seeing how you could do years and decades of shadow work and make great progress in terms of your ability to be with your inner child and take full custody of it and do those parts works and all of it and still live so much heavily identified in your mind and story and trying to improve it. And that can be a never-ending journey.
It's a great framework for seeing how you could do years and decades of shadow work and make great progress in terms of your ability to be with your inner child and take full custody of it and do those parts works and all of it and still live so much heavily identified in your mind and story and trying to improve it. And that can be a never-ending journey.
On the flip side, you can go deep into the contemplative practices and waking up beyond the story and still be an asshole. You can have a lot of those character things that are not resolved because no matter how much you become aware and separate yourself from a story, you still have a personality structure in there that you'll go back to, especially if you have a family and you live in society.
On the flip side, you can go deep into the contemplative practices and waking up beyond the story and still be an asshole. You can have a lot of those character things that are not resolved because no matter how much you become aware and separate yourself from a story, you still have a personality structure in there that you'll go back to, especially if you have a family and you live in society.
And so they're both needed. And like you spoke to earlier, We've seen so many examples of both, of the spiritual teacher who dies of alcoholism, of the enlightened guru that sexually abuses, right? What is that? Why does that happen? It's because there's all this other characterological stuff that's not addressed and can't be addressed from just the waking up perspective.
And so they're both needed. And like you spoke to earlier, We've seen so many examples of both, of the spiritual teacher who dies of alcoholism, of the enlightened guru that sexually abuses, right? What is that? Why does that happen? It's because there's all this other characterological stuff that's not addressed and can't be addressed from just the waking up perspective.
and we've we know obviously and you can experience a lot of of individuals who continue to do shadow work and continue to do the inner excavation uh which is amazing it's noble and um and it's a never-ending path unless you start to wake up beyond the the illusion of any story right um and so This, I think, ties nicely in also with your face model.
and we've we know obviously and you can experience a lot of of individuals who continue to do shadow work and continue to do the inner excavation uh which is amazing it's noble and um and it's a never-ending path unless you start to wake up beyond the the illusion of any story right um and so This, I think, ties nicely in also with your face model.
And so if you'd like to share kind of your process of how you orient yourself towards this, because what's really been useful and not just sharing your story, because that's amazing as well, but all these
And so if you'd like to share kind of your process of how you orient yourself towards this, because what's really been useful and not just sharing your story, because that's amazing as well, but all these
practical examples you've given of how whoever's listening to this right now can engage in their next challenging moment that happens in their life or when they go home and something happens, pleasant or unpleasant, they have more tools, like an internal capacity and capability to be with anything. Like that's a truly powerful individual. And I think some frameworks like that would support.
practical examples you've given of how whoever's listening to this right now can engage in their next challenging moment that happens in their life or when they go home and something happens, pleasant or unpleasant, they have more tools, like an internal capacity and capability to be with anything. Like that's a truly powerful individual. And I think some frameworks like that would support.
So yeah, yeah.
So yeah, yeah.
I think in terms of the earlier part of that journey of being able to focus and allow what's happening, we have to be aware of what's happening. We can't just be in the unconscious reactivity that's the habitual nature of our mind and what we've been in the past. And of course...
I think in terms of the earlier part of that journey of being able to focus and allow what's happening, we have to be aware of what's happening. We can't just be in the unconscious reactivity that's the habitual nature of our mind and what we've been in the past. And of course...
as it doesn't capture the whole picture, but meditative practices like Vipassana can allow you to widen the gap between the stimulus and the response and cultivate the capacity for equanimity in the face of any sensation and experience that is so invaluable to have that. Arguably, one of the most transformational things for our consciousness is our ability to simply sit quietly and
as it doesn't capture the whole picture, but meditative practices like Vipassana can allow you to widen the gap between the stimulus and the response and cultivate the capacity for equanimity in the face of any sensation and experience that is so invaluable to have that. Arguably, one of the most transformational things for our consciousness is our ability to simply sit quietly and
and not need something special to happen in the next moment and to be able to just essentially be with what is period end of story um not meaning that we don't take action or we don't change you know what's happening but but that ability is really powerful and just to kind of close out the and put a ribbon on on your story of of meditating for 14 hours a day for six months there are these
and not need something special to happen in the next moment and to be able to just essentially be with what is period end of story um not meaning that we don't take action or we don't change you know what's happening but but that ability is really powerful and just to kind of close out the and put a ribbon on on your story of of meditating for 14 hours a day for six months there are these
like latent faculties that we just don't get to experience because we're scrolling on TikTok all day. Like because we haven't been immersed or shown the kind of user manual of the human body and mind and what's possible when your mind is so concentrated. and how blissful it can be to simply be sitting down. When you taste that, I think your perception of life radically changes.
like latent faculties that we just don't get to experience because we're scrolling on TikTok all day. Like because we haven't been immersed or shown the kind of user manual of the human body and mind and what's possible when your mind is so concentrated. and how blissful it can be to simply be sitting down. When you taste that, I think your perception of life radically changes.
You stop being under the illusion that your ultimate happiness and key to fulfillment is somewhere external because you've experienced it. You've tasted that full satiation internally that wasn't attached to anything happening outside of yourself. And that's one of the most liberating things I feel like we can experience as a human being. And so what was it like? Share like maybe a peak moment.
You stop being under the illusion that your ultimate happiness and key to fulfillment is somewhere external because you've experienced it. You've tasted that full satiation internally that wasn't attached to anything happening outside of yourself. And that's one of the most liberating things I feel like we can experience as a human being. And so what was it like? Share like maybe a peak moment.
I know you had lots of difficulties throughout the time, but I know when you're focusing that much on a contemplative practice like that, you discover faculties and like capabilities as a human being that you just were not privy to. And I think it's an important reflection. So what was that like?
I know you had lots of difficulties throughout the time, but I know when you're focusing that much on a contemplative practice like that, you discover faculties and like capabilities as a human being that you just were not privy to. And I think it's an important reflection. So what was that like?
um the coming back was that's where the work started i think it's a one more thing important thing to come back to was uh the awareness of how even meditation itself can become a behavioral compensation and coping mechanism to not have to go into the story and that perspective that you can be with anything that you can be your own best friend uh
um the coming back was that's where the work started i think it's a one more thing important thing to come back to was uh the awareness of how even meditation itself can become a behavioral compensation and coping mechanism to not have to go into the story and that perspective that you can be with anything that you can be your own best friend uh
It's like you described it as like an inner coziness. I love that. It's just like a sort of warmth that... there's less friction between these noises in your head. You know, it's like, we can be with this, we can work with this because I think when people say like, love yourself or be your own best friend, it can kind of sometimes seem like this fragmented thing.
It's like you described it as like an inner coziness. I love that. It's just like a sort of warmth that... there's less friction between these noises in your head. You know, it's like, we can be with this, we can work with this because I think when people say like, love yourself or be your own best friend, it can kind of sometimes seem like this fragmented thing.
There's like you, and then there's, there's a voice in your head and you're trying to like talk with that instead of just recognizing as that's like all part of one thing. Yeah. And just making space for that to feel safe.
There's like you, and then there's, there's a voice in your head and you're trying to like talk with that instead of just recognizing as that's like all part of one thing. Yeah. And just making space for that to feel safe.
And so I'm just curious, because you've been doing this work also with so many different people on both sides of it, like how much of our efforts, both through meditation, through our behavioral compensation of so many different things, are really our subtle desire to just feel safe?
And so I'm just curious, because you've been doing this work also with so many different people on both sides of it, like how much of our efforts, both through meditation, through our behavioral compensation of so many different things, are really our subtle desire to just feel safe?
ability to give reassurance to yourself, it's such a switch to where I think culturally it's kind of conditioned to be in the pursuit. I mean, it's literally written in the Declaration of Independence, the pursuit of happiness. It's the extraction of joy from something outside, right? And instead of the sharing of joy from the inner wellspring that you have, it's a different orientation. And
ability to give reassurance to yourself, it's such a switch to where I think culturally it's kind of conditioned to be in the pursuit. I mean, it's literally written in the Declaration of Independence, the pursuit of happiness. It's the extraction of joy from something outside, right? And instead of the sharing of joy from the inner wellspring that you have, it's a different orientation. And
different things come out of both of those experiences separately.
different things come out of both of those experiences separately.
And I think as you start to deepen in these practices and awarenesses, you start to see how your sensitivity raises and your ability to listen to more subtle whispers in yourself about things that are happening within your own psyche, about intuitive impulses to move in certain directions career-wise, a certain level of resonance and ability to see if somebody in a relationship dynamic is meant for you or not.
And I think as you start to deepen in these practices and awarenesses, you start to see how your sensitivity raises and your ability to listen to more subtle whispers in yourself about things that are happening within your own psyche, about intuitive impulses to move in certain directions career-wise, a certain level of resonance and ability to see if somebody in a relationship dynamic is meant for you or not.
Like all of these things you start to attune to more. And that is an incredible place to live life from instead of just the wants and desires from ego. And so what's the difference of texture from desires that arise from stillness versus desires that arise from ego?
Like all of these things you start to attune to more. And that is an incredible place to live life from instead of just the wants and desires from ego. And so what's the difference of texture from desires that arise from stillness versus desires that arise from ego?
It's a really important reminder, too, that, of course, we can do this work before getting into relationships. And the unique capacity a relationship has, especially romantically, for being a mirror to our inner core vulnerabilities that would not have otherwise had the safe space to be held for is really real.
It's a really important reminder, too, that, of course, we can do this work before getting into relationships. And the unique capacity a relationship has, especially romantically, for being a mirror to our inner core vulnerabilities that would not have otherwise had the safe space to be held for is really real.
And maybe no other space would we feel safe enough to really experience and even just witness and see what those kind of core patterns are, except for romantic relationships. They have that unique capacity to kind of reveal those things for us. I'm curious, do you have any...
And maybe no other space would we feel safe enough to really experience and even just witness and see what those kind of core patterns are, except for romantic relationships. They have that unique capacity to kind of reveal those things for us. I'm curious, do you have any...
With your own relationship dynamic and coming to these awarenesses and choices, I'm curious about your journey because when it comes to making choices from the place that feel like they're actually not choices, they're almost like the choiceless choice.
With your own relationship dynamic and coming to these awarenesses and choices, I'm curious about your journey because when it comes to making choices from the place that feel like they're actually not choices, they're almost like the choiceless choice.
when it's coming from stillness, when it's coming from joy, the way you described it experientially, I really liked because it resonates with me as truth that there isn't this back and forth in convincing. There's just kind of this deeper knowing and receiving and accepting of what is.
when it's coming from stillness, when it's coming from joy, the way you described it experientially, I really liked because it resonates with me as truth that there isn't this back and forth in convincing. There's just kind of this deeper knowing and receiving and accepting of what is.
And the Buddhists also have a term for the sort of intuitive knowing called direct non-conceptual valid cognition. Mm-hmm. You know, meaning direct, it's right there. It's immediate in the experience. Non-conceptual, it's not of the mind in terms of formulation of thoughts or the intellect or logic. Valid, meaning obviously it's true. There's coherence to it.
And the Buddhists also have a term for the sort of intuitive knowing called direct non-conceptual valid cognition. Mm-hmm. You know, meaning direct, it's right there. It's immediate in the experience. Non-conceptual, it's not of the mind in terms of formulation of thoughts or the intellect or logic. Valid, meaning obviously it's true. There's coherence to it.
And cognition is like being aware of it, right? So it's like this level of intuitive, of knowing for things that are meant for us, for directions we want to go, choices we want to make. and many different impulses that can arise from our deeper sense of knowing. Like we think of the mind as just the intellect, but the mind is a vast sea that's connected to all life.
And cognition is like being aware of it, right? So it's like this level of intuitive, of knowing for things that are meant for us, for directions we want to go, choices we want to make. and many different impulses that can arise from our deeper sense of knowing. Like we think of the mind as just the intellect, but the mind is a vast sea that's connected to all life.
And so that's a different place to live from. And I'm curious how you related to that, deciding who you're gonna spend your life with and have a baby with and your journey with your relationship, because I know there was an arc there.
And so that's a different place to live from. And I'm curious how you related to that, deciding who you're gonna spend your life with and have a baby with and your journey with your relationship, because I know there was an arc there.
Absolutely. It's a messy, windy road and the synthesizing and integration of both paths isn't really talked about as much as I think I would like to. And I think it's getting more and more light, you know, but I think we're really familiar with the spiritual insight of waking up beyond the illusion of your thoughts and your emotions and, uh,
Absolutely. It's a messy, windy road and the synthesizing and integration of both paths isn't really talked about as much as I think I would like to. And I think it's getting more and more light, you know, but I think we're really familiar with the spiritual insight of waking up beyond the illusion of your thoughts and your emotions and, uh,
those meditative practices that can really support in waking up beyond the identification with those processes internally. And then, of course, the Western psychotherapeutic approach of parts work and healing your traumatic wounds and daddy issues and like, you know, really familiar with that too.
those meditative practices that can really support in waking up beyond the identification with those processes internally. And then, of course, the Western psychotherapeutic approach of parts work and healing your traumatic wounds and daddy issues and like, you know, really familiar with that too.
And I love to see the coming together of how they both support one another and are incomplete in and of themselves. And so we can continue to dive into that. I think a theme throughout this conversation is I want to pull from some quotes of yours, either from your posts online or book, and we can expand on it because I think they're articulated really well.
And I love to see the coming together of how they both support one another and are incomplete in and of themselves. And so we can continue to dive into that. I think a theme throughout this conversation is I want to pull from some quotes of yours, either from your posts online or book, and we can expand on it because I think they're articulated really well.
Powerful man, powerful. Yeah, getting to see your own journey. Because we've touched on a lot of themes on different aspects, but putting it into practice in your own life.
Powerful man, powerful. Yeah, getting to see your own journey. Because we've touched on a lot of themes on different aspects, but putting it into practice in your own life.
You know, we talked about those intuitive pulses that, you know, when you when you tune in from a place of stillness, you'll you'll move towards a direction that's going to bring you more true joy and what's meant for you in life.
You know, we talked about those intuitive pulses that, you know, when you when you tune in from a place of stillness, you'll you'll move towards a direction that's going to bring you more true joy and what's meant for you in life.
there are so many moments where it's just not that clear and despite all your practice and devotion to um growing your awareness like over years like half a decade of still like coming up against this resistance point so i mean it's commendable to honor the the part of you that is committed to the full fes like if there's a part of you that isn't fully there
there are so many moments where it's just not that clear and despite all your practice and devotion to um growing your awareness like over years like half a decade of still like coming up against this resistance point so i mean it's commendable to honor the the part of you that is committed to the full fes like if there's a part of you that isn't fully there
in terms of this is what I want to do to move forward, then it's also not honoring to your partner, you know? So it's important there, but obviously so frustrating at times because you don't have clear, like full clarity on what's the internal block for me having clarity on making a decision like this.
in terms of this is what I want to do to move forward, then it's also not honoring to your partner, you know? So it's important there, but obviously so frustrating at times because you don't have clear, like full clarity on what's the internal block for me having clarity on making a decision like this.
One aspect of internally feeling like we're not present for our life is this continual...
One aspect of internally feeling like we're not present for our life is this continual...
sort of orientation that our ideal life is somewhere in the future that is aka not now and and so this quote i think hits on that really well the belief that there is some future moment more worth our presence than the one we're in right now is why we miss our lives and so if you want to kind of share about your journey awakening to that realization uh because it's such a pervasive and persistent one i think throughout all culture
sort of orientation that our ideal life is somewhere in the future that is aka not now and and so this quote i think hits on that really well the belief that there is some future moment more worth our presence than the one we're in right now is why we miss our lives and so if you want to kind of share about your journey awakening to that realization uh because it's such a pervasive and persistent one i think throughout all culture
And what's come on the other side? I mean, we were just chatting as your baby was being born and, like, the...
And what's come on the other side? I mean, we were just chatting as your baby was being born and, like, the...
know the the fruit has been bared from making that decision collapsing the energy and um i know this is something that a lot of people struggle with in terms of commitment in terms of making these big decisions in life and discerning and seeing what's in alignment um it's a it's an interesting path to navigate to honor your truth to not abandon yourself um but then also make this commitment to somebody else that um has real effects in the world and their life and so
know the the fruit has been bared from making that decision collapsing the energy and um i know this is something that a lot of people struggle with in terms of commitment in terms of making these big decisions in life and discerning and seeing what's in alignment um it's a it's an interesting path to navigate to honor your truth to not abandon yourself um but then also make this commitment to somebody else that um has real effects in the world and their life and so
gets into muddy waters, you know, in this process. But yeah, so is there one thing you would say to somebody that's struggling in terms of that sort of commitment? And that's maybe whether it could be a relationship to anything in life, but, you know, romantic partner seems to be obviously a really popular one. It can be difficult at times.
gets into muddy waters, you know, in this process. But yeah, so is there one thing you would say to somebody that's struggling in terms of that sort of commitment? And that's maybe whether it could be a relationship to anything in life, but, you know, romantic partner seems to be obviously a really popular one. It can be difficult at times.
Um, you said like cultivate the ability to listen, but also seems like there is an inevitability to these things that will play out almost when they're supposed to. And as much as we want things to happen on our own time, the universe doesn't work like that.
Um, you said like cultivate the ability to listen, but also seems like there is an inevitability to these things that will play out almost when they're supposed to. And as much as we want things to happen on our own time, the universe doesn't work like that.
And so what do you think about this dichotomy of doing everything we can in this moment to, to make, to, to know what we need to know to make a decision. Um, but then also like having patience and seeing how things play out.
And so what do you think about this dichotomy of doing everything we can in this moment to, to make, to, to know what we need to know to make a decision. Um, but then also like having patience and seeing how things play out.
Corey Muscara. Thanks for being here, dude. Thanks, Andre. Yeah. One of my greatest joys on this podcast is getting to see these different individuals online who are sharing similar inspiring content around meditation, mindfulness, spirituality, and getting to connect in person and feel like, oh, we're going to be great friends off the bat. Yeah, likewise.
Corey Muscara. Thanks for being here, dude. Thanks, Andre. Yeah. One of my greatest joys on this podcast is getting to see these different individuals online who are sharing similar inspiring content around meditation, mindfulness, spirituality, and getting to connect in person and feel like, oh, we're going to be great friends off the bat. Yeah, likewise.
It feels pretty comprehensive. Yeah. Yeah. To connect, to acknowledge, to reveal, to empathize, to soften, to stay open, to feel it, to trust it, to embrace it. Yeah.
It feels pretty comprehensive. Yeah. Yeah. To connect, to acknowledge, to reveal, to empathize, to soften, to stay open, to feel it, to trust it, to embrace it. Yeah.
Thanks for sharing and showing it. There's so many paths to those different access points, whether you work with the raw energy of the system, whether you work with the language and the words of our neurology and how that's kind of built up.
Thanks for sharing and showing it. There's so many paths to those different access points, whether you work with the raw energy of the system, whether you work with the language and the words of our neurology and how that's kind of built up.
the historical somatic evidence that's built up in that familiar sense within our body, that familiarity, you can work directly with it in the body and the emotions and that aspect too. And why not leverage all of them? Like they're all access points and all have a component in which they're wound up in, you know? And so.
the historical somatic evidence that's built up in that familiar sense within our body, that familiarity, you can work directly with it in the body and the emotions and that aspect too. And why not leverage all of them? Like they're all access points and all have a component in which they're wound up in, you know? And so.
I think so much of compassion is needed here in this process of realizing that these wounds aren't our fault, but they are now our responsibility for us to be able to move through them. It can be easy to shame, blame, and be in our own victim narrative around these things, which is disempowering to the reality of just taking responsibility for our current and descending to transcend, as you said.
I think so much of compassion is needed here in this process of realizing that these wounds aren't our fault, but they are now our responsibility for us to be able to move through them. It can be easy to shame, blame, and be in our own victim narrative around these things, which is disempowering to the reality of just taking responsibility for our current and descending to transcend, as you said.
I think in a life that is inherently impermanent and uncertain to how things are going to transpire externally, there is this awakening to the realization that of like that backwards law, you know, of where we try to control things or want things to happen in a certain way. And the more that we try to pursue it, it almost eludes us.
I think in a life that is inherently impermanent and uncertain to how things are going to transpire externally, there is this awakening to the realization that of like that backwards law, you know, of where we try to control things or want things to happen in a certain way. And the more that we try to pursue it, it almost eludes us.
Like by holding our breath, we lose it, you know, and by trying to stay afloat, we can sink. And so it's this interesting balance of like you spoke to with the,
Like by holding our breath, we lose it, you know, and by trying to stay afloat, we can sink. And so it's this interesting balance of like you spoke to with the,
In terms of our internal, characterological, emotional wounds and trauma and stuff, but then also in terms of trying to create in the world and build our career and create the life of our dreams and whatnot, there is this interesting balance of intention, of action, and then also finding the place that arises from that state of inaction, of stillness and seeing that as a bedrock.
In terms of our internal, characterological, emotional wounds and trauma and stuff, but then also in terms of trying to create in the world and build our career and create the life of our dreams and whatnot, there is this interesting balance of intention, of action, and then also finding the place that arises from that state of inaction, of stillness and seeing that as a bedrock.
One quote that you shared in your book, saw on your Instagram post actually said, you don't find your ground by looking for stability. You find your ground by relaxing into instability.
One quote that you shared in your book, saw on your Instagram post actually said, you don't find your ground by looking for stability. You find your ground by relaxing into instability.
And so there's this interesting universal paradoxical framing that is really interesting to put into action in our life because it's a very unique philosophical exploration, but to actually live it is where liberation comes in.
And so there's this interesting universal paradoxical framing that is really interesting to put into action in our life because it's a very unique philosophical exploration, but to actually live it is where liberation comes in.
I certainly want to create from that place. That's where I strive to. And I see your impact both through social media and the innumerable courses and writings and things that you do as an extension of your ability to do that internally.
I certainly want to create from that place. That's where I strive to. And I see your impact both through social media and the innumerable courses and writings and things that you do as an extension of your ability to do that internally.
There's something very alluring in the personal development space of being somebody who says the most profound things, or it can quickly be divorced from the authentic sense of realization internally. And so I strive to have this platform and this podcast be a space for people that are speaking from direct experience. where what they're saying is actually connected to the place it's coming from.
There's something very alluring in the personal development space of being somebody who says the most profound things, or it can quickly be divorced from the authentic sense of realization internally. And so I strive to have this platform and this podcast be a space for people that are speaking from direct experience. where what they're saying is actually connected to the place it's coming from.
And so I feel like you do that very, very well. And it feels real and true and authentic to you. So thank you for sharing all of the fun nuggets of wisdom and insights and explorations we did today. It was epic. Thanks, Andre.
And so I feel like you do that very, very well. And it feels real and true and authentic to you. So thank you for sharing all of the fun nuggets of wisdom and insights and explorations we did today. It was epic. Thanks, Andre.
Thanks, man. I'll just leave it for any other last things you want to share, both maybe work you're doing, things in the world, anything else that's on your mind before we head out?
Thanks, man. I'll just leave it for any other last things you want to share, both maybe work you're doing, things in the world, anything else that's on your mind before we head out?
Great. Great touch points, dude. Thank you. Appreciate you. Excited to connect and develop our friendship more. Yeah. And everybody for tuning in. Thanks for being our virtual friend today and tuning into this conversation. Sending you much love. Until next time, be well.
Great. Great touch points, dude. Thank you. Appreciate you. Excited to connect and develop our friendship more. Yeah. And everybody for tuning in. Thanks for being our virtual friend today and tuning into this conversation. Sending you much love. Until next time, be well.
It's pretty amazing to feel the radical transformation in our present moment when we can, yes, acknowledge that there is maybe a certain arrangement of conditionings or a certain amount of money or relationship or health that is someday in the future we want to attain to, and we can have those.
It's pretty amazing to feel the radical transformation in our present moment when we can, yes, acknowledge that there is maybe a certain arrangement of conditionings or a certain amount of money or relationship or health that is someday in the future we want to attain to, and we can have those.
But to recognize that part of having that and part of actualizing that and to form in the manifest is not having it. And that's the journey that we're currently on. And so like not being on our path or feeling lost is our path.
But to recognize that part of having that and part of actualizing that and to form in the manifest is not having it. And that's the journey that we're currently on. And so like not being on our path or feeling lost is our path.
is is part of the whole journey um and so yeah finding that acceptance in the moment that maybe we want something to change but in the moment realizing that it is our current life right now and allowing us to land in this moment fully is is so much of our work and it's so tough to do that when we're so heavily identified with our own thoughts because we believe them to be true
is is part of the whole journey um and so yeah finding that acceptance in the moment that maybe we want something to change but in the moment realizing that it is our current life right now and allowing us to land in this moment fully is is so much of our work and it's so tough to do that when we're so heavily identified with our own thoughts because we believe them to be true
And so I know you started to wake up to this realization as well yourself, and then you decided to go spend six months as a monk. And so talk to me about awakening to that realization and that transition and what then led you to make such a radical choice.
And so I know you started to wake up to this realization as well yourself, and then you decided to go spend six months as a monk. And so talk to me about awakening to that realization and that transition and what then led you to make such a radical choice.
Yeah, it's really cool to dig into your story too and see your life as a former monk and becoming a best-selling author, cultivating quite the audience online and proliferating wisdom in these modern times. Something that really resonates with me, also the name of your book titles is this idea of like how we can stop missing our lives
Yeah, it's really cool to dig into your story too and see your life as a former monk and becoming a best-selling author, cultivating quite the audience online and proliferating wisdom in these modern times. Something that really resonates with me, also the name of your book titles is this idea of like how we can stop missing our lives
think as you start to realize what a gift this life is, you realize to the degree we've been unconscious for so much of it and living life through the perception of our own conditioning. So that phrasing of like, stop missing your life really resonates with me because I feel like
for many different periods of my life, I've been keenly aware of the passing of time and how aware I am and present I am during those periods and the times that I really haven't been. And it's painful to realize those times you haven't been because you see what a gift this life is. And so what comes to mind when you hear that phrasing, stop missing your life?
And why was that so kind of motivating for you?
I'm looking forward to hearing what ensued afterwards. But that insight you just shared about primary and secondary pain, you know, about the
reality of having a human body that experiences things but then the recycling and multiplication of that that our mind does as you know per habit is a really liberating perspective because then we can stop being prisoners to our experience and we can actually be liberators of it and one framing that i love around this too was experience awareness and story and so i would love if you could share a couple more examples of that and how it could be
practice and practical for anybody who's listening right now that is living life that has an experience the awareness of that experience and the stories that we unconsciously or consciously continue to label on top of that and how it's important to differentiate the three yeah
All great thoughts, right?
replacing disempowering stories with empowering ones, and then also waking up to an awareness that encompasses and will always be the background field in which any story arises, really support each other. And again, it can be easy to get sucked into one camp or the other.
I think it's great to replace old narratives that are old conditioning passed down through culture, family, genes, whatever, with new ones. You know, I am worthy is much better than I'm not worthy in terms of your internal experience and the fruits that it's going to bear in your external reality.
But even more empowering, perhaps, is to wake up to your worth that is inherent to your being beyond any story of it being
comparing to something externally you know whether it being i am not worthy or i am worthy and part of getting to that that point is i feel so much of creating distance from us in any story whether it's nice or not nice depending on what we think it is and that that requires practice to create distance between us and any narrative or story that are that's happening neurologically like
the reality is we're so close to our own bullshit. If we don't brush our teeth, as the saying goes, for a couple weeks, we won't really notice it because the change is so gradual and it's so close to us, we become accustomed to it, but other people can tell, right?
And so that's, I think, where it becomes really easy when you're at Thanksgiving dinner and you see all the neuroses in your family members or you're in school and you can see things and patterns that play out in other people way more easily than you can yourself. Mm-hmm. Of course, you have them too, right? As much as we don't like to admit it.
But it's in creating distance between us and those stories and those patterns that we begin to see them. And so... Can I... Yeah, I just wanted you to jump in here too because you talked about the jump from awareness to story. And obviously, we're practicing cultivating the awareness between the two. Yeah.
Mic drop.
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That last note about transcendence being, again, not something that we're in the continual acquisition of, but is the realization, which is why it's called self-realization.
as the letting go and the undoing of those parts of us that aren't actually us, but yet we subtly or sometimes grossly believe to be ourselves, then realizes and makes space for that experience of our true nature and true self. A great book on the synthesizing of what you're talking to that people want to check out is Already Free by Bruce Tift. Oh, yeah.
It's a great framework for seeing how you could do years and decades of shadow work and make great progress in terms of your ability to be with your inner child and take full custody of it and do those parts works and all of it and still live so much heavily identified in your mind and story and trying to improve it. And that can be a never-ending journey.
On the flip side, you can go deep into the contemplative practices and waking up beyond the story and still be an asshole. You can have a lot of those character things that are not resolved because no matter how much you become aware and separate yourself from a story, you still have a personality structure in there that you'll go back to, especially if you have a family and you live in society.
And so they're both needed. And like you spoke to earlier, We've seen so many examples of both, of the spiritual teacher who dies of alcoholism, of the enlightened guru that sexually abuses, right? What is that? Why does that happen? It's because there's all this other characterological stuff that's not addressed and can't be addressed from just the waking up perspective.
and we've we know obviously and you can experience a lot of of individuals who continue to do shadow work and continue to do the inner excavation uh which is amazing it's noble and um and it's a never-ending path unless you start to wake up beyond the the illusion of any story right um and so This, I think, ties nicely in also with your face model.
And so if you'd like to share kind of your process of how you orient yourself towards this, because what's really been useful and not just sharing your story, because that's amazing as well, but all these
practical examples you've given of how whoever's listening to this right now can engage in their next challenging moment that happens in their life or when they go home and something happens, pleasant or unpleasant, they have more tools, like an internal capacity and capability to be with anything. Like that's a truly powerful individual. And I think some frameworks like that would support.
So yeah, yeah.
I think in terms of the earlier part of that journey of being able to focus and allow what's happening, we have to be aware of what's happening. We can't just be in the unconscious reactivity that's the habitual nature of our mind and what we've been in the past. And of course...
as it doesn't capture the whole picture, but meditative practices like Vipassana can allow you to widen the gap between the stimulus and the response and cultivate the capacity for equanimity in the face of any sensation and experience that is so invaluable to have that. Arguably, one of the most transformational things for our consciousness is our ability to simply sit quietly and
and not need something special to happen in the next moment and to be able to just essentially be with what is period end of story um not meaning that we don't take action or we don't change you know what's happening but but that ability is really powerful and just to kind of close out the and put a ribbon on on your story of of meditating for 14 hours a day for six months there are these
like latent faculties that we just don't get to experience because we're scrolling on TikTok all day. Like because we haven't been immersed or shown the kind of user manual of the human body and mind and what's possible when your mind is so concentrated. and how blissful it can be to simply be sitting down. When you taste that, I think your perception of life radically changes.
You stop being under the illusion that your ultimate happiness and key to fulfillment is somewhere external because you've experienced it. You've tasted that full satiation internally that wasn't attached to anything happening outside of yourself. And that's one of the most liberating things I feel like we can experience as a human being. And so what was it like? Share like maybe a peak moment.
I know you had lots of difficulties throughout the time, but I know when you're focusing that much on a contemplative practice like that, you discover faculties and like capabilities as a human being that you just were not privy to. And I think it's an important reflection. So what was that like?
um the coming back was that's where the work started i think it's a one more thing important thing to come back to was uh the awareness of how even meditation itself can become a behavioral compensation and coping mechanism to not have to go into the story and that perspective that you can be with anything that you can be your own best friend uh
It's like you described it as like an inner coziness. I love that. It's just like a sort of warmth that... there's less friction between these noises in your head. You know, it's like, we can be with this, we can work with this because I think when people say like, love yourself or be your own best friend, it can kind of sometimes seem like this fragmented thing.
There's like you, and then there's, there's a voice in your head and you're trying to like talk with that instead of just recognizing as that's like all part of one thing. Yeah. And just making space for that to feel safe.
And so I'm just curious, because you've been doing this work also with so many different people on both sides of it, like how much of our efforts, both through meditation, through our behavioral compensation of so many different things, are really our subtle desire to just feel safe?
ability to give reassurance to yourself, it's such a switch to where I think culturally it's kind of conditioned to be in the pursuit. I mean, it's literally written in the Declaration of Independence, the pursuit of happiness. It's the extraction of joy from something outside, right? And instead of the sharing of joy from the inner wellspring that you have, it's a different orientation. And
different things come out of both of those experiences separately.
And I think as you start to deepen in these practices and awarenesses, you start to see how your sensitivity raises and your ability to listen to more subtle whispers in yourself about things that are happening within your own psyche, about intuitive impulses to move in certain directions career-wise, a certain level of resonance and ability to see if somebody in a relationship dynamic is meant for you or not.
Like all of these things you start to attune to more. And that is an incredible place to live life from instead of just the wants and desires from ego. And so what's the difference of texture from desires that arise from stillness versus desires that arise from ego?
It's a really important reminder, too, that, of course, we can do this work before getting into relationships. And the unique capacity a relationship has, especially romantically, for being a mirror to our inner core vulnerabilities that would not have otherwise had the safe space to be held for is really real.
And maybe no other space would we feel safe enough to really experience and even just witness and see what those kind of core patterns are, except for romantic relationships. They have that unique capacity to kind of reveal those things for us. I'm curious, do you have any...
With your own relationship dynamic and coming to these awarenesses and choices, I'm curious about your journey because when it comes to making choices from the place that feel like they're actually not choices, they're almost like the choiceless choice.
when it's coming from stillness, when it's coming from joy, the way you described it experientially, I really liked because it resonates with me as truth that there isn't this back and forth in convincing. There's just kind of this deeper knowing and receiving and accepting of what is.
And the Buddhists also have a term for the sort of intuitive knowing called direct non-conceptual valid cognition. Mm-hmm. You know, meaning direct, it's right there. It's immediate in the experience. Non-conceptual, it's not of the mind in terms of formulation of thoughts or the intellect or logic. Valid, meaning obviously it's true. There's coherence to it.
And cognition is like being aware of it, right? So it's like this level of intuitive, of knowing for things that are meant for us, for directions we want to go, choices we want to make. and many different impulses that can arise from our deeper sense of knowing. Like we think of the mind as just the intellect, but the mind is a vast sea that's connected to all life.
And so that's a different place to live from. And I'm curious how you related to that, deciding who you're gonna spend your life with and have a baby with and your journey with your relationship, because I know there was an arc there.
Absolutely. It's a messy, windy road and the synthesizing and integration of both paths isn't really talked about as much as I think I would like to. And I think it's getting more and more light, you know, but I think we're really familiar with the spiritual insight of waking up beyond the illusion of your thoughts and your emotions and, uh,
those meditative practices that can really support in waking up beyond the identification with those processes internally. And then, of course, the Western psychotherapeutic approach of parts work and healing your traumatic wounds and daddy issues and like, you know, really familiar with that too.
And I love to see the coming together of how they both support one another and are incomplete in and of themselves. And so we can continue to dive into that. I think a theme throughout this conversation is I want to pull from some quotes of yours, either from your posts online or book, and we can expand on it because I think they're articulated really well.
Powerful man, powerful. Yeah, getting to see your own journey. Because we've touched on a lot of themes on different aspects, but putting it into practice in your own life.
You know, we talked about those intuitive pulses that, you know, when you when you tune in from a place of stillness, you'll you'll move towards a direction that's going to bring you more true joy and what's meant for you in life.
there are so many moments where it's just not that clear and despite all your practice and devotion to um growing your awareness like over years like half a decade of still like coming up against this resistance point so i mean it's commendable to honor the the part of you that is committed to the full fes like if there's a part of you that isn't fully there
in terms of this is what I want to do to move forward, then it's also not honoring to your partner, you know? So it's important there, but obviously so frustrating at times because you don't have clear, like full clarity on what's the internal block for me having clarity on making a decision like this.
One aspect of internally feeling like we're not present for our life is this continual...
sort of orientation that our ideal life is somewhere in the future that is aka not now and and so this quote i think hits on that really well the belief that there is some future moment more worth our presence than the one we're in right now is why we miss our lives and so if you want to kind of share about your journey awakening to that realization uh because it's such a pervasive and persistent one i think throughout all culture
And what's come on the other side? I mean, we were just chatting as your baby was being born and, like, the...
know the the fruit has been bared from making that decision collapsing the energy and um i know this is something that a lot of people struggle with in terms of commitment in terms of making these big decisions in life and discerning and seeing what's in alignment um it's a it's an interesting path to navigate to honor your truth to not abandon yourself um but then also make this commitment to somebody else that um has real effects in the world and their life and so
gets into muddy waters, you know, in this process. But yeah, so is there one thing you would say to somebody that's struggling in terms of that sort of commitment? And that's maybe whether it could be a relationship to anything in life, but, you know, romantic partner seems to be obviously a really popular one. It can be difficult at times.
Um, you said like cultivate the ability to listen, but also seems like there is an inevitability to these things that will play out almost when they're supposed to. And as much as we want things to happen on our own time, the universe doesn't work like that.
And so what do you think about this dichotomy of doing everything we can in this moment to, to make, to, to know what we need to know to make a decision. Um, but then also like having patience and seeing how things play out.
Corey Muscara. Thanks for being here, dude. Thanks, Andre. Yeah. One of my greatest joys on this podcast is getting to see these different individuals online who are sharing similar inspiring content around meditation, mindfulness, spirituality, and getting to connect in person and feel like, oh, we're going to be great friends off the bat. Yeah, likewise.
It feels pretty comprehensive. Yeah. Yeah. To connect, to acknowledge, to reveal, to empathize, to soften, to stay open, to feel it, to trust it, to embrace it. Yeah.
Thanks for sharing and showing it. There's so many paths to those different access points, whether you work with the raw energy of the system, whether you work with the language and the words of our neurology and how that's kind of built up.
the historical somatic evidence that's built up in that familiar sense within our body, that familiarity, you can work directly with it in the body and the emotions and that aspect too. And why not leverage all of them? Like they're all access points and all have a component in which they're wound up in, you know? And so.
I think so much of compassion is needed here in this process of realizing that these wounds aren't our fault, but they are now our responsibility for us to be able to move through them. It can be easy to shame, blame, and be in our own victim narrative around these things, which is disempowering to the reality of just taking responsibility for our current and descending to transcend, as you said.
I think in a life that is inherently impermanent and uncertain to how things are going to transpire externally, there is this awakening to the realization that of like that backwards law, you know, of where we try to control things or want things to happen in a certain way. And the more that we try to pursue it, it almost eludes us.
Like by holding our breath, we lose it, you know, and by trying to stay afloat, we can sink. And so it's this interesting balance of like you spoke to with the,
In terms of our internal, characterological, emotional wounds and trauma and stuff, but then also in terms of trying to create in the world and build our career and create the life of our dreams and whatnot, there is this interesting balance of intention, of action, and then also finding the place that arises from that state of inaction, of stillness and seeing that as a bedrock.
One quote that you shared in your book, saw on your Instagram post actually said, you don't find your ground by looking for stability. You find your ground by relaxing into instability.
And so there's this interesting universal paradoxical framing that is really interesting to put into action in our life because it's a very unique philosophical exploration, but to actually live it is where liberation comes in.
I certainly want to create from that place. That's where I strive to. And I see your impact both through social media and the innumerable courses and writings and things that you do as an extension of your ability to do that internally.
There's something very alluring in the personal development space of being somebody who says the most profound things, or it can quickly be divorced from the authentic sense of realization internally. And so I strive to have this platform and this podcast be a space for people that are speaking from direct experience. where what they're saying is actually connected to the place it's coming from.
And so I feel like you do that very, very well. And it feels real and true and authentic to you. So thank you for sharing all of the fun nuggets of wisdom and insights and explorations we did today. It was epic. Thanks, Andre.
Thanks, man. I'll just leave it for any other last things you want to share, both maybe work you're doing, things in the world, anything else that's on your mind before we head out?
Great. Great touch points, dude. Thank you. Appreciate you. Excited to connect and develop our friendship more. Yeah. And everybody for tuning in. Thanks for being our virtual friend today and tuning into this conversation. Sending you much love. Until next time, be well.
It's pretty amazing to feel the radical transformation in our present moment when we can, yes, acknowledge that there is maybe a certain arrangement of conditionings or a certain amount of money or relationship or health that is someday in the future we want to attain to, and we can have those.
But to recognize that part of having that and part of actualizing that and to form in the manifest is not having it. And that's the journey that we're currently on. And so like not being on our path or feeling lost is our path.
is is part of the whole journey um and so yeah finding that acceptance in the moment that maybe we want something to change but in the moment realizing that it is our current life right now and allowing us to land in this moment fully is is so much of our work and it's so tough to do that when we're so heavily identified with our own thoughts because we believe them to be true
And so I know you started to wake up to this realization as well yourself, and then you decided to go spend six months as a monk. And so talk to me about awakening to that realization and that transition and what then led you to make such a radical choice.
Yeah, it's really cool to dig into your story too and see your life as a former monk and becoming a best-selling author, cultivating quite the audience online and proliferating wisdom in these modern times. Something that really resonates with me, also the name of your book titles is this idea of like how we can stop missing our lives