Dr. Fenton
Appearances
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Now, they did give him a diagnosis of oppositional defiant disorder, but apparently this was pretty common back then to give out as this generic condition so that the therapy sessions were covered by insurance. No criteria had to be met for it to be used, and it was essentially a placeholder for any behavioral issues a parent was concerned about.
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But other than that, James's therapist noted that there were no severe concerns about him. And according to James's parents, that first bit of therapy seemed to work. After just three sessions, Arlene told the therapist that James's behavior had really improved and that he was being much more present with his family.
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James would later recall that sometime between 1998 and 2000, when he was about 11 to 13 years old, he started having these vague, reoccurring images of people being killed, and they would just pop in his head out of nowhere. He said that sometimes it would happen multiple times a week, Other times it wouldn't happen at all.
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In James's own words, he knew the thoughts weren't normal, but he tried not to worry about them. Now what James was experiencing at the time is called intrusive thoughts, which are essentially unwanted thoughts or images that pop into your brain seemingly out of nowhere. Maybe you're driving and you randomly think about crashing your car.
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You're in a crowded theater and you think about standing up and screaming in the middle of the performance. Now, it doesn't mean you're actually going to do these things or even that you want to. It's just a random thought that pops into your head. According to a 2014 study, 94% of Americans have at some point experienced an intrusive thought.
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In this episode, we are going to tell you everything that led up to this tragic event, including the life of the shooter, James Holmes. But if you don't want to hear about that, make sure to join us next week. In that episode, we will walk you through everything that happened that day. We will talk about the victims, the aftermath of the shooting, and the fate of the man responsible.
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But some can be a lot darker, like thinking about killing someone. Some people even suffer from intrusive sexual thoughts. like engaging in sexual behavior with a child or an animal. These thoughts can elicit a sense of panic in some individuals, which can sometimes create a feedback loop, resulting in them having them more often.
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Trigger warnings from the stories we cover may include violence, rape, murder, and offenses against children.
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And that frequently happens with people who suffer from obsessive compulsive disorder. And as you'll learn, James did have symptoms of OCD. But later on, when James Holmes was asked why he never told anyone about these intrusive thoughts, He simply responds, quote, they were private.
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And making friends at that age can be hard. James's life was about to completely change. A new home, new neighborhood, a new school. He was worried. James would later say that he tried to voice his frustrations to his family, but they didn't listen. He said he felt ignored, like nothing he said mattered. And before they knew it, they were packing up and leaving their life behind.
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According to close friends and family, as the moving trucks pulled away, his little sister Chris was screaming and sobbing. James had tears streaming down his face. He would later say that along the drive to San Diego, he was so upset about moving, he even grabbed a piece of cardboard from a box and began to saw at his wrist with it, but no one in the car knew what he was doing.
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When his mother saw the injury later on, she shrugged it off, thinking it was a paper cut. James never told them that he tried to hurt himself. Later on, when asked why he didn't tell his parents, he responded, quote, just because I wanted to keep it private, end quote. And it seems like that's how his family operated. Negative feelings were kept private.
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Now, this is not an attack on Arlene or Bob, because in reality, that's true for a lot of families. Feelings are kept inside. For some kids, it's a minor issue, but for others, it turns into a problem that follows them all of their life and evolves into something much, much bigger.
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But I'm Courtney Browen,
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Now, even though kids this age go through these awkward periods, James's parents were a little concerned. Their daughter, Chris, was thriving. She was social and making friends, but James was clearly struggling. So like they did in the past, his parents decided to get him some professional help.
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they ended up calling an agency called Psycare, and they were put into contact with a social worker named Mel Lipsy, and she would end up meeting with James and his parents 14 different times. Now, the notes she took from their sessions together have been lost, but James admitted that he never opened up about the intrusive thoughts he was having.
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He would later talk about these sessions in his journal, writing, quote, "'Family therapy with Mel revealed nothing "'as to not appear weak amongst family.'" So clearly, he didn't want his family to know what was going on with him. Had James revealed any of his feelings at the time, his life may have gone in a different direction, but he didn't.
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And he did a pretty good job at making it seem like everything was okay. Even though his parents had expressed concern about his isolated behavior, they were told by a lot of people that that's just what it's like raising a teenager. But beneath the surface, it was much darker. The intrusive thoughts James had been having since he was a kid continued.
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But it's around his high school year when they started branching out a bit. In addition to seeing people getting killed, he said he would sometimes picture the world getting wiped out with an atomic blast. Now, Dr. William Reed would later spend a lot of time with James Holmes. And in his book, A Dark Night in Aurora, he talked about these nuclear intrusive thoughts.
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And to him, they represented James's fear of letting his anger take control.
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So clearly, James had a problem with expressing himself. But holding everything in wasn't helping either. Anytime his brain wasn't occupied, these intrusive thoughts slipped into his psyche, consuming him. Now, up until this point, his intrusive thoughts never involved him. He would just see images of death, violence, and destruction.
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But soon enough, he started having thoughts of being the cause of that death, violence, and destruction, that he was the person attacking or killing people. He would later say that he knew something was deeply wrong with him, but he didn't want people to know that, so he kept it hidden away.
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Many people silently suffering with mental health problems, intrusive thoughts, suicidal ideation, or homicidal ideation think that keeping their thoughts inside will make them less real. But in reality, that only allows them to fester. That festering breeds shame, resentment, and hatred. which is why it is so important to share these things with a professional.
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But on the outside, when people crossed paths with James Holmes, no one suspected a thing. He made good grades in school, he had a small group of friends, and he appeared to be a normal kid. His old friend, Alex Van Horn, would later say, "'There's people you see in high school "'that you worry about sometimes. "'He wasn't one of those.'"
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Eventually, James would even graduate high school at the top of his class. He had also been accepted into a competitive internship at the San Diego Stock Institute, where he would be taking part in a neurobiology program. But his advisor said, "'Communicating with James was difficult,' I frequently had to ask yes or no questions to get responses from him.
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And here is actually a short video of him at this internship.
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Now at that point, James had already earned a full ride to the University of California, Riverside, where he was going to major in neuroscience. From appearances, he had a very successful future ahead of him.
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With the distractions of school, his friends and video games, James was largely able to keep his violent thoughts at bay. However, he would later say that when left alone, the thoughts would creep back into the foreground. One specific thought that often came into his mind was about humanity as a whole and how he believed everyone would be better off dead.
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James said that he ruminated on this thought for years, starting around 2006 all the way until 2010. In his exact words, he would later say this.
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During his time at UC Riverside, James was in the honors program. And one requirement for that program was that he had to complete a certain number of volunteer hours per year. Everyone in the program was given this big list of options to choose from. And James chose to volunteer at an orphanage in Tijuana, Mexico.
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While there, he bought gifts for the children, he ate with them every day, and he played different sports, which is kind of crazy to think about. From what we know about James Holmes today, you wouldn't think that he liked children, but apparently he did.
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In fact, during his undergrad program, he also worked as a camp counselor at Camp Max Strauss, which is a residential program for underprivileged youth. Now, one of the kids that James worked with that summer actually had schizophrenia. And James would later say, quote, these kids were heavily medicated, but this did not solve their problems, only create new ones.
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The medication changed them from highly energetic, creative kids to lax beings who slept through activities. I wanted to help them, but I couldn't. End quote. Now, according to his coworkers, superiors, and the campers, James was a phenomenal counselor.
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They did have to urge him to be a bit more outgoing, but other than that, they said he was positive, goofy with the kids, and great at making them feel safe, which is strangely what people said about James for a lot of his life. When he was a child, he would help lead the younger kids into Halloween haunted houses, comforting them and showing them that it wasn't that scary.
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He didn't get joy out of watching them scared. Then as he got older, he routinely chose to work or volunteer with kids. Now, interestingly, years down the road after James had been arrested, he even expressed concern when he saw that some of his victims were children.
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For most of the mass shooting episodes we cover, we start the episode off by telling you about someone's unfortunate upbringing. A lot of times, the men who go on to commit these shootings come from broken homes. Their childhoods are riddled with trauma, abuse, and neglect. And from an early age, the warning signs are right there. Sometimes these children will hurt animals. start fires.
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Disheartened by the rejections, James decided to return to his parents' house in San Diego. And for the first few weeks, he spent all of his time sleeping in and playing video games. Now I'm sure at first, his mom let him relax a little. After all, he had just earned his degree after a lot of hard work. But after a few weeks, Arlene told James that he had to go get a job.
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She wasn't going to let him just rot away in his room all summer. So he eventually found work at Marical Incorporated, a supplement factory. James worked from 4 p.m. to 2 a.m. five days a week, and he was in charge of operating a pill-coating machine. Now, his coworkers at this job said that he was definitely strange. One coworker said that it almost seemed like he had a mental condition.
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Another said that she called him the giggler, as he was always known to giggle throughout his shift.
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Now, James worked at this job for about three months during the summer and fall of 2010. But soon enough, his parents started urging him to go back to school. After all, that was his goal all along. So from there, he started the application process once again. In one of his essays he submitted, James writes the following-
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Movies have been a safe haven for over 100 years. They can make us feel sad, happy, scared, hopeful. They can make us cry and laugh and feel connected to those around us. It's a way to escape reality for a bit. jumping into a whole different world, which was exactly the case for nearly 400 people in Aurora, Colorado on July 20th, 2012.
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And this time around, he was far more successful. Of the six schools he applied to, three moved forward with his application, the University of Iowa, the University of Illinois, and the University of Colorado. Now the University of Iowa asked to have an in-person interview with James, to see if he was a good fit for their program.
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But after their interview, a psychology professor told the admission board, "...not to admit him under any circumstances." There aren't any details as to why this professor was so adamant about this, but that very decision may have prevented a massacre from happening in that town. However... the University of Colorado was impressed with James Holmes.
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In fact, he was one of six students that they picked to be a part of this program. And they offered him $26,000 a year in financial aid. So for James, it was an easy decision. he would attend the University of Colorado, nestled in the town of Aurora.
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That acceptance, that single chance moment in time, is what led to Aurora being forever associated with one of the most deadly mass shootings in history. James' story is brimming with moments like these. where his path diverges in two directions. And sadly, he repeatedly descended down the darker path over and over and over.
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They'll draw bloody pictures of people being killed. Then, when they grow up, you'll often see them posting concerning things online. They'll cause problems in school. And finally, when that person commits the shooting, most people who knew them aren't surprised. In fact, sometimes the people around them will tell you that they saw it coming all along.
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usually wearing jeans and some type of t-shirt. But he wasn't very friendly. Another student said, quote, he would basically communicate with me in one word sentences. He always seemed to be off in his own world, which did not involve other people as far as I could tell, end quote.
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It was also said that during these classes, while everyone else was taking vigorous notes on the lesson, James wouldn't. he would just kind of stare off. One of his professors even said that James appeared so withdrawn that he wasn't even sure he was actually comprehending anything when he would get called on in class. Everyone said he began his answers with a long drawn out, uh...
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While attending the University of Colorado, James crossed paths with a student named Gargi Dada. He saw her one day in one of his classes and he thought she was beautiful. Soon enough, the two would strike up a conversation and that's when James learned that she wasn't just pretty, but wildly intelligent as well. They also had a lot of similar interests.
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Now, Gargi ended up inviting him to a study session that week. They exchanged emails, but that night, James sent her his phone number. He said, quote, "'If you text me, I will tell you an amazingly best ever world's greatest knock-knock joke.'" Now, something that Gargi said was that James was super witty and fun over texts, but in person, he was completely different.
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He would try to make jokes, but they often didn't land because of how awkward he was. But nonetheless, she decided to go out with him. Their first date was at a horror film festival. And during it, James told her that he had been with other girls before. But that wasn't true. Gargi was his first girlfriend and his first sexual experience. And from there, he quickly fell in love.
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But the story we have for you today isn't like that. The childhood of James Holmes was so incredibly normal, which in itself is unsettling. As humans, we find comfort when we can place blame on something. Not that a shitty childhood is ever an excuse for why these people go on to commit such atrocities, but at least we can look into their past for answers.
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By January of 2012, James even texted his friend Ben, telling him that he was having delusions. Now Ben was open to the conversation and he was supportive, but James wouldn't really open up. Ben started asking him, well, are you seeing things? Are you hearing things? James admitted that he wasn't having any auditory hallucinations.
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but he was seeing things so ben then asked him well what are you seeing what delusions are you having but james's response was chilling he told his friend that it was a quote secret now we know that james started having thoughts of killing people years prior images that would pop up in his head But according to James, for the first time in his life, they weren't just images in his head anymore.
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He was actually seeing these violent things in the spaces around him, right there in the room with him. He mainly claims to have seen shadows, including a shadow that was quote, juggling heads.
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Now, after their breakup, Gargi and James continued to see each other and talk frequently. But the things James was saying were concerning her, so much so she urged him to see a psychiatrist. So that March, James reached out to the Student Health Service Center and made an appointment with a social worker named Margaret Rolfe.
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During their first session on March 16th, Margaret sat down with James and asked him about what was going on in his life. What symptoms are you having? But like many times before, James didn't wanna open up. He even told her that he didn't wanna tell her about the thoughts he was having because, quote, you would have to report me, end quote.
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But finally, after a while, he admitted that he, quote, wanted to kill people. Now, I always thought that if someone says this in therapy, the professional is supposed to report it. But apparently, James told her that he didn't have anyone in particular that he wanted to kill. And since there was no specific target, she didn't have to report it.
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However, in the case of James Holmes, we can't really do that. Sometimes parents can do everything right. They can give their children a good education, put them in therapy, and give them all the advantages to live a good and productive life. But still, something goes wrong.
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Following their session, Dr. Roth wrote that James, quote, had no dangerousness. She also wrote, quote, Now immediately after their first session, Dr. Roth emailed the senior psychiatrist, Dr. Lynn Fenton. In her email to her, she wrote, quote, He is the most anxious guy I have ever seen and has symptoms of OCD.
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What most concerning is that he has thoughts of killing people, though I do not think he is dangerous. He said he did not want to tell me everything he was experiencing, as I might have to report it." So from there, Dr. Len Fenton agreed to meet with James on March 21st.
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So during their first appointment, Dr. Fenton was mostly trying to understand James's history, what symptoms he had. The first session is usually just getting a broad understanding and establishing a rapport. But that was hard for James. He didn't like opening up. However, he did mention that he had just been dumped. Dr. Fenton then asked him about his past relationships.
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And James said the following,
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After a while, the conversation shifts over to the homicidal thoughts he had been having, thoughts he had for a while now. According to Dr. Fenton, James tells her this.
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Dr. Fenton said she didn't understand what he meant by biological problem, but considering he said it wouldn't be an effective solution, she figured he didn't actually plan on killing anyone. And she asks him that. Are these homicidal thoughts directed at anyone in particular?
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Are you planning to kill anyone?
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She asks him, do you ever have thoughts about hurting yourself?
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Next, Dr. Fenton asks James if he would consider taking medication. James says he would be open to it. So she decided to prescribe him an antidepressant called Zoloft. Now, James hadn't told her he was depressed, but Dr. Fenton noted that he did appear to be a little sad. And she said that the drug also helps with social anxiety and OCD, which she thought he had both.
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And like always, she put him on a low dose to make sure he could tolerate it. Now this drug takes a few weeks to kick in. And because James was having anxiety, she also decided to prescribe him something that would work right away. It was a benzo that relieves anxiety called Klonopin. James mentioned that he had a lab presentation coming up that he was anxious about.
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So Dr. Fenton said that the Klonopin should help with that. But she also said that in the back of her mind, she believed that if these drugs didn't help, that she might have to prescribe James an antipsychotic.
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based on some of the statements he made she couldn't tell if james was just a little odd or if he had some sort of personality disorder like schizoid if that was the case then an anti-psychotic would work better but she would have to have a few more sessions with him to make that determination so at the end of their appointment she told james to take the medication she prescribed him and they scheduled an appointment together for the following week
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Dr. Fenton said that leaving that session, she did not believe James was going to act out in any aggressive or violent way. She said that James was definitely guarded. It was clear he had a hard time opening up, and when he spoke, he usually gave very short answers. But in her mind, he was not dangerous.
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What is so evil that you want to do?
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Killing people is too much effort. You'll end up locked up. Most people are not worth what might happen to you because of the act.
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Now, soon after this, on March 27th, James would have his next session with Dr. Fenton. And this one was supposed to be a shorter one, just 20 minutes to see how the medications were working. James reportedly shows up on time. He's wearing his normal clothes and acting the same as he did before. And when he sits down, Dr. Fenton asks him, how are you doing? James says the following,
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Dr. Fenton told him that he didn't have to take it anymore. Instead, she wanted him to try propranolol, which is good for performance anxiety. It can help if your heart starts racing or you feel jittery, and she felt like it would be a better fit. So she prescribed him that, and they scheduled another meeting for the following week to see if the medications were working.
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Like all the times before, Dr. Fenton said he showed up on time and it seemed as if nothing had changed. When he sat down, she asked him how he was doing and he responds with the following.
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Dr. Fenton suggested that they lower his dose. James continues.
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Dr. Fenton told him that he might be feeling tired from the Zoloft, which can be a side effect. So she told him to start taking it at night. Now, this was another shorter session. Dr. Fenton didn't ask him any more about his homicidal thoughts, But she did suggest another medication, an antipsychotic called Seroquil, which helps a lot with anxiety.
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However, James was worried that it would be too sedating. So instead, she told him to continue with his medication and they scheduled another meeting two weeks later.
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Around this time, James starts talking to another girl in one of his classes. On April 9th, he messaged her, The girl asked how he was doing in the class, and James responded, Not great. The following week, on April 17th, he would meet with Dr. Fenton again. He walked into her office, took a seat, and like all the times before, she asked how he was doing. Do you feel depressed or suicidal?
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She asked.
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Are you having any more homicidal thoughts?
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What are those obsessive thoughts you're having?
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Now, Dr. Fenton said that she tried to press him further on this, but he wouldn't really elaborate. But she said that based on what she observed of James, she didn't think he would respond well to keep pushing for answers. So she moved on. Interestingly, Dr. Fenton said that it's here where James started talking about the meaning of life.
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he wanted to know what she thought the meaning of life was but dr fenton didn't want to talk about her philosophies these sessions were about him so she didn't answer his question but to her surprise he started to get really upset he even angrily asked her why won't you tell me Dr. Fenton wrote that he was having psychotic level thinking, meaning his thoughts aren't reality.
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From what she was observing, she also believed that he had some sort of social anxiety disorder, but she also got the feeling like if she said one wrong thing, something that upset James, that he would just stop treatment altogether. So she played it safe.
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But again, she said that even though he admitted to having these homicidal ideations, he was still showing no signs that he planned to act on them. So she adjusted his meds and planned the next session. But later that week, as Dr. Fenton was sitting at her computer, she received an email. You see, she had accidentally written down the wrong last name on James's prescription.
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She put James Hughes instead of James Holmes. In the email to her, James lets her know about the mistake and he writes the following.
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But something else she noticed in the email was this weird symbol she didn't recognize. She decided she would ask him about it in their next session. Now that week, James went on with his life as he normally did. He also extended the lease on his apartment for another six months.
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A few days after that, he texted that new girl in class and said, "'Why do you gotta distract me with those short shorts?' That weekend, James asked the girl if she wanted to go on a hike with him, and she agreed, but she would later say that he was extremely awkward during it.
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But then on May 1st, James arrived at Dr. Fenton's office for his next session, and she starts it off by asking how he's doing.
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Now, she would later say that she didn't think he was being genuine. Kind of like when you run into someone you know in public and they ask how you're doing, you just say you're doing good, even if you're not. James tells Dr. Fenton that his ex-girlfriend texted him again and that she's going through the five stages of grief. Right now, he said she's in the depression stage.
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And again, this is interesting because James is acting like he broke up with her when it was the opposite. He also said he texted his ex-girlfriend the following message.
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James starts talking about how he's been interested in another girl, that girl he took on the hike. And he says it's dangerous because she's in his neuroscience class and that there's only six students total. So from here, Dr. Fenton once again asks about his past relationships.
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James tells her that he's dated multiple women, but that it usually only lasts for about four months and then he would just stop talking to them. But again, this was a lie. James had only been with one other girl and she ended things with him. But next, the conversation drifted off to his classes. James said that he had some important exams coming up. In one class, his lab wasn't working.
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he wasn't getting any data so he said he would have to quote make up some end quote now dr fenton was happy that james was talking but her mind goes to that email he sent earlier that week the one that had that weird symbol so she apologizes for the mix-up with his prescription and then she asks him what was that symbol you included in your email
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But James doesn't want to tell her, so she pushes a little more. What was it? But again, he won't say. Dr. Fenton said that it took several minutes of going back and forth for him to finally tell her what it was. And he says the following.
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Dr. Fenton doesn't know what to think, but then he follows it up with this.
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Clearly, there's something going on with James if he's sending symbols about punching her. So next, Dr. Fenton brings up his homicidal ideations. But again, James isn't forthcoming. However, he does say this.
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Dr. Fenton didn't understand. Can you elaborate on that? She asks.
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But she still didn't understand. However, she still said that he gave no indication that he planned to act on these homicidal thoughts. Now, Dr. Fenton was wondering that maybe James was closed off because she was a woman. Maybe if a male doctor was there, he would feel more comfortable. She also wanted a second opinion on how to move forward with James. So she suggests an idea.
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Following their marriage in 1986, Robert and Arlene moved to San Diego. Arlene began to write for the Imperial Beach Star News, and her husband, who usually went by Bob, worked as a statistician for the Navy Personnel Center. They had a really great life together. They were successful, they had a nice house on the beach, and plenty of money. The only thing missing from their lives were children.
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She wanted to know how James would feel about her superior coming into their sessions, Dr. Robert Feinstein. Now she had worked with him a lot and he specialized with individuals who had violent tendencies. She thought that he would add some helpful information. But at first, James didn't like the idea. He was suspicious. And he said this.
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But Dr. Fenton reassured him, no, no, no, it's just to get some more information for your treatment. And with that, James agreed. But in that moment, he made an observation of Dr. Fenton saying this.
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Now, soon after this, their session would come to an end and Dr. Fenton hoped that in their next meeting, they could get a little further. But soon after leaving her office, James started spiraling. He came to the realization that school wasn't working out for him. That week, he had even messaged one of his professors expressing his desire to join his lab.
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But the professor writes back letting him know that he has some concerns and that he isn't sure James is the right fit. Following that, James would message his father about how he had been struggling in his classes. His dad responds that the job market is rough right now and that he should stay in school. James then changes the subject and tells his dad that he has a new lady friend.
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He says they went on a hike and had a good time. But I think it's here where James realizes that he's lost all purpose in life. He lost his girlfriend and he's flunking his classes. So sadly, he comes up with another purpose for his life. He's going to kill people. And on May 10th, he purchases the first of his supplies. It's a tear gas canister and a gas mask.
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Now, James didn't have all the details of his plan mapped out just yet, but he would start brainstorming in his notebook. First, he thinks about using a bomb. However, he decides against it.
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Next, he considers biological warfare, but that's not a good idea either.
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So what about being a serial killer? James wrote in his notebook that he could go to national parks and pretend he was on a walk. He wrote about using a stun gun that looks like a cell phone. And when he was walking through the parks, he would pretend to be using that cell phone when he walked by a victim.
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Then when they weren't looking, he would use the stun gun to take them down, pull out a folding knife, and then stab them to death. Later on, James would even purchase a cell phone stun gun and a folding knife. However, he decided that this plan wouldn't work out either, writing the following.
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James wanted more than that. So that's when he came up with the idea of a mass shooting. He even weighed the pros and cons of it.
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But to James, this was his best option. He was going to commit a mass shooting. The next question was where? But before he could work out those details, he had another therapy session with Dr. Fenton And this time, Dr. Feinstein would be joining them as well.
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Now, before the session, the doctors met up to discuss their plan and they decided that Dr. Feinstein would be the one to conduct the interview and Dr. Fenton would just observe. So on May 31st, James walked into her office and Dr. Feinstein started the session. James told him that he had recently gone through a breakup. and that after the breakup, he told his girlfriend that he hates people.
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Both Bob and Arlene always knew that they wanted to be parents, and they fulfilled that dream on December 13th, 1987. Arlene went into labor and ended up needing a C-section. It was definitely not an easy birth, but after several long hours, their son, James Egan Holmes, had finally made his way into the world. Many parents recall the first time they held their baby, and looked into their eyes.
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James also told Dr. Feinstein that he hates sheeple, sheep people. Now from there, they talked a little bit about James's family, and then the conversation shifted to school. James said he had some big exams coming up, but he wasn't studying for them. When asked why, James said the following.
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Dr. Feinstein asks, So if you're not studying, what have you been doing? Of course, James didn't tell him that he had been planning a mass shooting. So instead, he says this, I've been playing this game called Diablo.
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Dr. Feinstein asks, Have you been having any more homicidal thoughts?
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Do you have plans to act on those thoughts?
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Do you think about killing anyone in particular? No. Are you depressed or suicidal? No. So from here, Dr. Feinstein suggests what Dr. Fenton did a few sessions back. He asks James if he would be open to taking that antipsychotic, but James says no, he didn't wanna take it. And soon after that, the session ends.
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They don't make any more adjustments to his medication, but they do schedule their next session that Dr. Feinstein wanted to be a part of. Again, neither of them believed that James was a danger to himself
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or others but they couldn't have been more wrong in his journals he even called dr fenton a mind rapist and a pill popper he thought that she wasn't actually trying to help him she was just drowning his problems with different pills that he said weren't working and unbeknownst to the doctors he had already been planning his attack He had been purchasing supplies for the attack.
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And the next thing he needed to figure out is where the mass shooting would take place. According to his notebook, he first considered an airport, but decided against it.
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And that's when he thinks about doing it at a movie theater, specifically the Century 16 Theater near his apartment. In his notebook, James writes the following.
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James had been to this theater a number of times, but that week he went back, not because he really wanted to see a movie, but because he wanted to scope the place out to see what he was working with. While there, he noticed that the theaters had these double doors, so he decided that he would buy some handcuffs so he could lock them together. A locked door meant more casualties.
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and James wanted to kill as many people as he could. But that also meant that he would have to do it during a movie where a lot of people would show up. So after looking at the movies that were releasing that summer, James decided to do it during the midnight showing of the Batman movie, The Dark Knight Rises. Later that night, he wrote this in his journal.
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In his notebook, he also writes about how he's finally going to give in to his hatred of mankind. He's finally going to do something about it. But he notes that first, he needs to do some research.
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He also decides that on top of committing a mass shooting, he wanted to booby trap his apartment. So he started buying explosives and more weapons. He bought a Glock Model 22 and a 40 caliber handgun at a local sporting goods store. Then he bought a Remington 870 12 gauge shotgun and close to 7,000 rounds of ammunition. And he didn't try to hide these purchases.
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You experience a love that you never thought possible. And in that moment, you vow to love and protect them for the rest of their life. I'm sure Bob and Arlene experienced this exact same moment with James. However, they could have never imagined the life he would go on to live.
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He used his real name, credit card, and email for all of it. He also continued writing in his journal.
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As James's arsenal of weapons started growing, he began taking the guns apart in his apartment. He wanted to get familiar with everything. He also started researching other mass shootings. He wanted to look at those to see what the police response times were and how much ammo he needed. He even calculated how far the Aurora Police Department was to the Century 16 Theater.
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He calculated that they would probably get there in about three minutes. something he would have to consider. He also said that around this time, his homicidal ideations were getting worse. During his lab rotations, James claimed to have seen flickerings, blobs, and head juggling shadows. Now, some people believe this, others don't.
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But one thing that we do know is that James's desire to kill was getting stronger, while his motivation to do well in school was worse than ever.
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For the session, both Dr. Fenton and Dr. Feinstein were there, and this time they would both be asking him questions. How did your exams go? Dr. Fenton asks.
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Dr. Fenton says she's sorry he didn't do well, but some students can retake them if they talk to their professor.
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Now, most students in his position would be freaking out, but strangely, James didn't seem to care. Dr. Fenton even wrote down in her notes that he was, quote, inappropriately nonchalant, end quote. In fact, he almost looked relaxed, like dropping out gave him some relief. Now, they started asking him about his plans once he dropped out.
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Well, are you going back home to California? They ask him.
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Fenton and Feinstein figured that given his situation, he had appropriate goals for his future. Nothing that screamed he was going to end his life or the life of others. So next, they ask if he told anyone he had dropped out.
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Dr. Fenton and Dr. Feinstein try to convince him to keep coming back to therapy, but James said that since he's not a student anymore, it won't be covered by insurance. However, they tell him to keep coming back anyway, and they'll figure it out. But next, James does something really strange. About 20 minutes into their 50-minute session, he randomly stands up, turns on his heels, and walks out.
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No handshake, no goodbye, or anything. But he never indicated he was planning to harm anyone. So again, they said they couldn't put him under any psychiatric hold. Here is Dr. Fenton explaining this.
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But Dr. Fenton was so uneasy about the situation, she decided to break her pledge of doctor-patient confidentiality and she called James' mother. When Arlene answered the phone, Dr. Fenton said that James had been seeing her for his anxiety, but then she said, Did you know he quit school? Arlene said she suspected it because the last time they spoke, James said he was struggling.
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But Arlene claimed that she was never informed that James was having homicidal ideations. She and Dr. Fenton also talked about James continuing treatment, even though he wasn't a student anymore. And Arlene offered to continue paying for the therapy sessions. However, James would never come back.
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It was the midnight premiere of the highly anticipated Batman film, The Dark Knight Rises. Everyone in the theater grabbed their popcorn and their candy, and as the lights turned out, they completely immersed themselves in the film before them. But soon enough, they would all witness something horrific. except it wouldn't be on a screen.
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The beta team is in charge of helping students that have potentially dangerous behavior. After receiving a report, they will then conduct a background check on the individual to see if they have some sort of criminal record. They also check to see if they have been in the military to look at possible PTSD, and then they will go from there.
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So Dr. Fenton said she called them to figure out what she should do next. Here is this potentially violent man who just dropped out of school. What should we do with him?" Now, in the beta's report, they said, quote, Lynn Fenton described James Holmes as having homicidal thoughts and also stated that he had threatened and harassed her via email text message. End quote.
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However, despite this information, they decided not to take action because James was no longer a student there. Dr. Fenton also contacted the campus police department and believe it or not, they offered to put James on a 72 hour hold, but Dr. Fenton declined it. She didn't think he met the criteria for the hold. So after she reported it to Beta, that was it.
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No one would ever go to check up on James Holmes. If they had, they may have seen the arsenal of weapons in his apartment. They may have seen his journal entries where he was meticulously planning an attack and they may have intercepted his plan, but they didn't.
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And now that he had fully dropped out of school, James could now dedicate all of his time to preparing for the massacre that was just on the horizon.
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Now in the month of June is where James really started planning and getting everything ready. He visited the Century 16 Theater a number of times to study the building, and he wrote out a pros and cons list.
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Over time, James began going into each of the theaters inside Century 16 to see which one would be best to attack. In his notes, he wrote that Theater 12 was a good one, only two exits. He gave Theater 10 three stars, writing, only two exits, excellent spatial approach. But other theaters weren't as good. In his notes, he wrote that Theater 8 had four exits, two that were visible.
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avoid that one he wrote and finally after looking through all of them james decided that he would either do theater 9 or theater 10. both sat hundreds of people and they both had just two exits during the attack james planned on throwing tear gas near those exits so that people wouldn't be able to see where to run But strangely enough, James also planned on escaping after the massacre.
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He even purchased tire puncturing devices to use on police cars so he could get away. He bought a ton of body armor so that he wouldn't get shot in the attack. And just in case he did, he also purchased a first aid kit for himself. He truly thought that he could shoot up this theater and then escape.
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On July 1st, he went out and bought a rifle and more ammunition. He also drove to a shooting range about two and a half hours away from Aurora. He ended up going to this range five different times before the shooting to practice. He bought specialty earmuffs and he spent hours shooting at life-size silhouettes.
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Witnesses reported that while shooting at the targets, he would move side to side, sometimes even crouching down. he was perfecting his form. That week, he also bought these black contacts that he wanted to wear during the shooting. Ones that made your eyes look completely black. He would later say that he bought them because he thought it would make him look cool.
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On July 17th, James buys a movie ticket for The Dark Knight Rises on July 20th, 2012. And he actually buys three of them because every time he purchased the ticket, it put him in Theater 8. Now Theater 8 was one of the theaters that he wanted to avoid due to the amount of exits. So he tries to buy another ticket to Theater 9.
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and another and another, but every time he does, it just gives him a ticket to theater eight. So that's when he decided, screw the ticket, I'll just pretend I'm walking into theater eight and instead I'll slip into theater nine. Earlier that week, he also bought an iPod so he could play music during the attack.
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He also bought window tent for his car and air fresheners to mask the smell of gasoline in his apartment. In the days before the shooting, James laid out all of his weapons on his bed. He tried on all of his tactical gear. He would later say, quote, "'I tested it first, just wearing it with all the magazines in their places and the gun slings on and off.'"
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end quote he said while wearing everything he looked at himself in the mirror he even snapped a picture of him holding up a gun he would later say that he wanted to look dangerous during the shooting like if people saw him they would be afraid he said that that was important because of all the people that were going to be in the theater he said quote you don't want 400 people rushing you it's quite easy they could have overwhelmed me
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Which brings us to July 19th, 2012. As the evening approached, the midnight showing of the Dark Knight Rises was just hours away. And James was finishing up the last minute details of his plan.
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That evening, James walked outside of his apartment complex holding a remote control car and a boombox. And from there, he walks over to his apartment's dumpster and sets them down on the ground. Now he rigged the boombox so that in exactly 40 minutes, loud music would start playing from it. He hoped that someone would follow the sound of the music.
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And when they did, they would see the remote control car sitting by the trash can. In James's mind, if someone saw that remote control car sitting there, they would have to pick it up and play with it. Except the remote did not control the car. It was actually connected to his booby-trapped apartment. So if someone did find it and they pushed a button on the remote...
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the apartment would engulf in flames. Now after setting this by the dumpster, James gets ready for the night. He packs up his gear, weapons, ammunition, and his body protection. He also takes a Vicodin, which is a pain medication. He would later say that he did this because he didn't want to get hurt if he got shot. But before leaving, he blares some music in his apartment.
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He was hoping that if someone would hear it, they would walk into his unit, right into the trip wire. But from there, shortly before midnight, he leaves his home and makes his way to the Century 16 Theater.
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Upon arriving to the theater, James parked his white sedan in the back. Now me and Colin actually visited this theater earlier this year, and the back parking lot is completely isolated. Even when we went, there were no cars, no security guards, or anything. So on that night, as James drove to the back, no one was suspecting a thing. James parked his vehicle right outside of Theater 9's exit,
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When James was five years old, Bob and Arlene had their second child, a daughter named Chris. And according to his family, he absolutely loved his little sister. One day, shortly after her birth, he even approached his mom and asked if she could help him write a letter. It read, quote, Dear Chris, I love you, Chris. I wish you could play basketball and soccer with me.
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Then after parking, he walked around to the main entrance and showed the workers his ticket. Now remember, he bought a ticket for Theater 8, but he planned on just walking into Theater 9 and finding an open seat. But before he did, he hung out around the concessions for a while. He likely saw people getting popcorn and drinks for the movie he was about to shoot up.
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Many people walked to the theater with smiles on their faces, wearing their Batman t-shirts, so excited for the night ahead. James was also excited, but for a different reason. Shortly after midnight, he walks into Theater 9. There were hundreds of people already in their seats, watching the previews. James takes a seat next. near the front.
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But after a few minutes, he pulls out his phone and pretends to take a call. He puts the phone up to his ear, stands up, and then walks out of the theater's exit door by the screen. Now these doors are made so that you can leave in an emergency, but once they close, you can't get back in from the outside. However, James had already prepared for this.
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He pulled out these clips that he attached to the door to keep it propped open. Then from there, he made his way to his car to put his gear on.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
Once James was fully dressed, he grabbed his weapons and supplies. His plan was to walk in the theater and throw two cans of tear gas, one for each exit. Then he would begin shooting using a number of guns he had with him. But first, James decided to make a phone call. He pulled out his phone and called the university's mental health crisis hotline.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
Now exactly what happened with this call is still a little unclear. The prosecution would later say that James hung up as soon as someone answered. A worker claimed that she tried to talk to the caller, but only heard silence. However, James said that no one ever picked up. Now, there are some people who believe this was a cry for help.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
However, there are others who think that James planned this entire thing out wanting to claim insanity and calling the university hotline would help his case. But we will get into that more in next week's episode. After calling the hotline, James grabbed his headphones and he began blaring loud techno music.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
He would later admit that he didn't want to hear the sounds of the attack, so he turned up the volume as high as it could go. As he stepped out of the car, holding his guns and tear gas, he accidentally dropped one of the tear gas canisters. He looked around for it on the ground, but he couldn't find it. It had rolled underneath his car, but that didn't matter. He didn't need it.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
And from there, he took a deep breath and he opened the door to Theater 9. The flickering light from the screen illuminated the audience of 400 innocent people. James could see their faces. To him, they were numbers, lives he needed to take to improve his own. He then tightened his finger around the trigger of his shotgun. He recalled thinking to himself, quote, I'm really going to do this.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
I wish you could play light bright. You have soft, cute skin. You're a happy baby. I wish you could play marbles with me. You can when you grow up. You need four more years. Love, Jimmy, your brother. According to Arlene, right after the letter was written, James insisted on feeding her a bottle and reading it to her.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
But what happened next would haunt our country to its core because up until this point, movie theaters were safe. And within an instant, that would all change.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
It was the kind of relationship every parent hopes to see between their children. And in the beginning, the Holmes family was so happy. Later on, when asked what he remembered about his childhood, James' response was, quote, lots of hugs. It was clear he was growing up in a good, stable, and loving home. But like with any child, there were some bumps along the road.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
For instance, in his early childhood years, James had a few irrational fears. But what kid doesn't? The first fear of his were that, quote, thugs were going to sneak into his window at night and kidnap him. And his second fear is what he referred to as nail ghosts. According to James, they were ghosts that would hammer nails through the wall by his bed at night, trying to poke him.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
And he was so scared of these ghosts poking him with these nails that he would sleep in the middle of his bed, far away from the wall.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
It would be right there in front of them in that very theater. About 18 minutes into the movie, a 24-year-old named James Holmes would enter the theater through an exit door. And before anyone even realized what was happening, he would unleash a hail of bullets into the crowd. By the time he was finished and the smoke cleared from the room, the dark floors were drenched in blood
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
At their new home in Salinas, they spent a lot of quality time together. Every single night they sat together and ate dinner at the table, no matter what was going on in their lives. One of James's fondest memories was when his mom would cook spaghetti. Arlene and the kids would throw wads of noodles at the cabinets to see if it was ready. If the spaghetti stuck, it was al dente.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
If it didn't, it had to go for a little longer. James would later laugh recalling this memory because, for whatever reason, every time the noodles would stick to the cabinets, paint would peel off with it. But even so, they continued this little tradition. James also said that his parents attended every single event that he and his sister had growing up.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
Whether it was concerts or sporting events, they would always be there to support their children. Bob even coached James' soccer team. He would later say, quote, Jimmy was the happiest when he was playing soccer, end quote. So to him, even though he was working all the time and taking care of his ailing mother, it was important for him to be there for these special moments.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
But things weren't always perfect between the siblings. In fact, it was reported that when James was eight years old, his parents brought him to see a therapist after he threw a toy at his baby sister. His parents said that he would often throw things when he got upset, so they wanted to make sure everything was okay with him. They also told the therapist that James was very Nintendo-oriented.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
But again, these things aren't screaming future killer. Now throwing things when you're mad obviously isn't good, but kids that age don't know how to regulate their emotions. So tantrums are pretty common. So is being obsessed with your Nintendo. But still, his parents wanted James to work through these problems to ensure that he was getting the guidance he needed.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
popcorn, shoes, and bodies. In the end, more than 70 people were injured and 13 people would lose their lives. And this horrific act was not only a tragedy, but a cultural shift because one day movies were a safe place and then they weren't. So this is the story of the Dark Knight Rises mass shooting.
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
And I think this just goes to show how present Bob and Arlene were in their children's lives. they saw a problem and they wanted to help however james would later say that his family wasn't really one to talk about their problems or their feelings bob would later say of their family quote we were more scientific non-emotional end quote which is probably why they took james to the therapist
Murder In America
EP. 203: COLORADO - The “Dark Knight Rises” Movie Theater Shooting (PT. 1)
They knew that they weren't good at talking through these kind of things, so they turned to a professional. Now, his therapist would later note that James was, quote, quiet and non-communicative, end quote. But they also said he was polite, pleasant, and alert.