Dr. Sarah Wakeman

Yep.

Yep.

Yeah, I think you feel powerless. You feel like you want to do something and you either don't know what to do or feel like everything you've tried hasn't worked. I think, again, because people have been exposed to this idea that it's an issue of willpower or choice, which really implies that if people wanted it bad enough, they could just stop.

Yeah, I think you feel powerless. You feel like you want to do something and you either don't know what to do or feel like everything you've tried hasn't worked. I think, again, because people have been exposed to this idea that it's an issue of willpower or choice, which really implies that if people wanted it bad enough, they could just stop.

And so if you're a family member, then that's easy to feel like, oh, they don't love me enough, you know, that they're not choosing me over this substance. And so I think often people feel deeply hurt and they've, you know, been through experiences that have created trauma for themselves. There's a lot of trauma within families who are experiencing this.

And so if you're a family member, then that's easy to feel like, oh, they don't love me enough, you know, that they're not choosing me over this substance. And so I think often people feel deeply hurt and they've, you know, been through experiences that have created trauma for themselves. There's a lot of trauma within families who are experiencing this.

And then they're sometimes given really bad advice, you know, that you have to like kick someone out or this whole concept of kind of tough love and that people need to hit bottom, you And so sometimes people, you know, either do that and then wrestle with the guilt of was that the right thing or not, or they feel bad even like being kind or loving to their family member.

And then they're sometimes given really bad advice, you know, that you have to like kick someone out or this whole concept of kind of tough love and that people need to hit bottom, you And so sometimes people, you know, either do that and then wrestle with the guilt of was that the right thing or not, or they feel bad even like being kind or loving to their family member.

So I think there's a whole mix of feelings. And of course, if you lose someone, you always wonder what if, like, could I have done something differently? Could something else have changed? And I think people can feel angry and sad and guilty and be left with that.

So I think there's a whole mix of feelings. And of course, if you lose someone, you always wonder what if, like, could I have done something differently? Could something else have changed? And I think people can feel angry and sad and guilty and be left with that.

I think they needed science-based treatment and compassion and empathy. And I think they needed a world where addiction was not seen as something to be ashamed of or something that we judge, but rather something that is a problem. You know, the shift from, like, you are the problem to, like, you have a problem and we can help you with this.

I think they needed science-based treatment and compassion and empathy. And I think they needed a world where addiction was not seen as something to be ashamed of or something that we judge, but rather something that is a problem. You know, the shift from, like, you are the problem to, like, you have a problem and we can help you with this.

And I think too often we have approached it as if, like, you the person are the problem.

And I think too often we have approached it as if, like, you the person are the problem.

Absolutely. I mean, I think about that all the time. And I think of a friend, I lost overdose. I think of the family member, I lost alcohol.

Absolutely. I mean, I think about that all the time. And I think of a friend, I lost overdose. I think of the family member, I lost alcohol.

And not only things that I could have done differently, but also those people, they saw their doctor, they were in the hospital, they had all these touch points, all of these reachable moments where someone could have engaged with them and offered them kindness and actual effective care that's backed by science, and they weren't. And

And not only things that I could have done differently, but also those people, they saw their doctor, they were in the hospital, they had all these touch points, all of these reachable moments where someone could have engaged with them and offered them kindness and actual effective care that's backed by science, and they weren't. And

So there are all of these like missed moments and missed opportunities. But the other thing I think about is like how much time I lost with them because I think often in this model of like tough love and kicking people out or thinking like I'm not going to see you until you stop using or stop drinking because I think that's going to help make them make that change.

So there are all of these like missed moments and missed opportunities. But the other thing I think about is like how much time I lost with them because I think often in this model of like tough love and kicking people out or thinking like I'm not going to see you until you stop using or stop drinking because I think that's going to help make them make that change.