Dr. Tara Swart

That's a really big learning that I've had over the last decade or so.

Exactly.

We're obviously much kinder to our children and our pets than we are to ourselves.

We don't give ourselves that same break that we might give to our children.

And so the thing with three-year-olds is that it's very physical.

So when something goes wrong, they will literally throw their toys, they will throw themselves to the ground so you can see what's going on.

Inside your brain, have you seen that movie Inside Out?

Oh, you must watch it.

It's a Disney film.

It's about a child who you can see the little characters in their brain that are their emotions.

And so basically your three-year-old's behavior is going on inside your head, but you're not demonstrating that to the world because you've learned to regulate your emotions.

Before we forget, let's get back to the, how long does it take to create or change a habit?

There are so many things out there, like it takes two weeks or 42 days or 66 days or whatever, but none of those are true because basically it depends what it is.

If it is going from eating a bar of chocolate to one square of chocolate every night, you could do that in probably two weeks.

You could create that habit in two weeks.

If it's something like improving your emotional intelligence or your intuition, that's going to take at least nine months.

I mean, I actually talk about the neuroplasticity process for a profound change as literally like the gestation period of a baby.

So the amount of time it takes from fertilization for a baby to be born, because you are literally becoming a new person if you change something that fundamental about yourself.

It's like going through the birth process.

And then, you know, let's use the analogy of language because it's a very tangible one.