Mike Ridgeman

My name is Mike Ridgeman. I was a teacher. I was a public school teacher. That was my career.

Did a master's degree at Fairfield University in Connecticut. Taught some more English. and then applied to and was accepted to the doctorate program at Penn State University. The goal was get that degree so I have the credential necessary to teach at a university level. That's what I thought I was doing.

I began adjuncting immediately. I think there were four local universities that I was adjuncting in, and I'm like, oh, well, okay, here we go. You know, one of these is bound to turn into something full-time.

When you get a PhD from Penn State, you feel like you're going to go somewhere, you know? It just, it never did. And then you wonder, like, is it me? Did I do something wrong?

You know, I had a little come-to-Jesus meeting with my wife, and she kind of, I don't remember her exact words, but her message was, I know you've given 20 years to this and have put in a lot of time and effort to making a career for yourself in education, but this family cannot carry on not knowing how much or if you're going to work from semester to semester.

And she's like, we need you to have, you know, for lack of a better phrase, a real job. You know, and God bless her for having the guts to say that to me. I'm sure that was not easy for her. That idea you have that, okay, I'm gonna have a fulfilling career on a campus where there are, you know, creative, thoughtful people with new ideas and just this vibrancy and this enthusiasm for learning.

I'm gonna get to be around that my whole life. And then you gotta flip the switch and find something else to do.

When I went to go work for my current employer, I was picking orders for bicycles in the warehouse for $11.50 an hour. I'm like, what the am I doing here? How did I end up here, right? I have a doctorate degree in education. And I don't mean to say that like I, because I have friends who work at that warehouse and that's their career and they love it.

So I don't want that to come off in a wrong way, but that was professionally, that was rock bottom right there. No doubt. I've somehow failed myself by not being able to get to whatever place it was that I had envisioned for myself. But more than that, I feel like I sold my wife a false bill of goods.

One of the benefits of being a faculty member at a university is a free or reduced education tuition for dependents, you know, to help the kids. And then all of a sudden I feel like I have fallen short of how I advertised myself to her. And I feel like I let the kids down too. I still feel like I'm a positive influence on them in many ways. academically, they're both doing incredible things.

One's in high school now and one is in college. But yeah, I just, I feel like I've let them down in some way too, and that I wasn't able to do more for them. I need to be honest with myself here too, right? I mean, I have a wonderful home. I have a wonderful family. I have a job. I don't have to worry about where I'm going to eat or sleep. I'm sure that I still look like

like my life turned out great, but that's not how it feels. As far as blame goes, I'm certainly culpable. I should have, I think, done more to learn about what I was getting into. Part of my problem was I did not ask enough questions. And I don't think I knew the right questions to ask, But I think had I just started down that road of asking questions, I would have found the right questions.

I miss teaching every day. I miss those relationships. I miss, you know, I still get emails from some of the undergraduates that I taught. That's what I miss, you know, getting a kid to run through that brick wall for the very first time and seeing the look on their face when they're like, oh my God, I just did that. And you're like, yes, man, you did. You just did that.

There's nothing that replaces that feeling. And I miss that. I miss that tremendously.