Representative Sarah McBride
Appearances
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
the MAGA movement writ large, to me, I just think, I hope they find healing. And truthfully, it's one of the reasons why I do this work is because I think in this country, we so desperately need politicians who recognize that they don't have to believe that people are right for what people are facing to be wrong. And we don't have to believe that people are right for us to try to right that wrong.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
And I wanna fight for people who look like me and think like me and people who don't look like me and don't think like me and might even be saying really, really, really hurtful things about me. Because we will all be better off if all of us heal a little bit.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
But one... I truly believe it. And it frankly makes it easier for me to deal with things, to know that when people are saying those things, it is saying more about them than it is about me. And, like, I don't believe what they're saying. So then I can sort of dispassionately remove myself from it and look and just say, what you're saying is, yeah, it's not nice to me or people like me.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I do think for some folks, the cruelty can be the point. Yeah. But I do believe that hurt people hurt people. And I do believe, yes, we've sort of gone down this rabbit hole of disinformation and misinformation and it radicalizes people. But I think people are so much more susceptible to being radicalized when they are hurt and in pain and in fear.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
And that's not only the strategy, but really the defining feature of what is a win versus a loss for a lot of the Republican members of Congress.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I mean, I try to—look, I don't really think Donald Trump cares about this stuff. It's—Donald Trump cares about what gets him more power and what gets him more— I don't think Donald Trump cares about trans people or LGBTQ people. I think people in his orbit do. I think he sees that some people in his base do.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
It's probably part of a legal strategy to lay the foundation to obviously not only eliminate the conception of non-binary folks in law, but to create a definition that lays the foundation for the government no longer validating or acknowledging or respecting binary trans identities.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
Look, there are a lot of reasons right now not to be optimistic. But, you know, I think we often think of history and humanity as cumulative. We feel like we are the beneficiary of hundreds of years of lessons of history. But the reality is that unless you have lived it and experienced it, it's pretty easy not to know it.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
You know, my generation, we grew up, we were born after the fall of the Soviet Union, right? We have existed in a world post-civil rights, post-1960s. And one of the things that I take comfort in in this moment, having tried to take time to listen and learn about what it felt like
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
to live in the times prior to the 1960s is that the sense of inevitability that with hard work change will come that we have felt in a post-1960s world, the sense that we were on this sort of unending cresting wave of cultural momentum, that is all the exception in our history. Right? Yes, we have every reason to fear that change won't come right now.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
But you can't tell me that the reasons for hopelessness now are greater than the reasons for hopelessness for an LGBTQ person in 1965, before Stonewall, when they maybe never knew of a reality where they could live openly and authentically as themselves without violating the law. Every previous generation, especially those generations prior to the 60s and 70s, faced seemingly impossible odds.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
They could not see the light at the end of the tunnel. Yet they persevered, they summoned their hope, they found the light, and they changed the world.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I'm looking... frankly, beyond. I'm looking at everything because we've got to recognize that all of these attacks are interconnected. I'm looking at the money that's being stolen right now from farmers, from health officials, from federally qualified health centers, from food banks. from infrastructure funds in Delaware and across the country by the federal government.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I'm looking at the effort to implement the largest cut in American history of Medicaid. I'm looking at the federal workers who are being summarily fired in Delaware and across the country because this administration is trying to grind
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
All of that comes together to try to create a world where people continue to be hungry and scared and fearful, which then lays the foundation for those fears and that insecurity to be exploited to eliminate due process for society. both undocumented immigrants and legal immigrants in this country, legal residents, for them to target and scapegoat and fearmonger around trans people.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
All of this is interconnected. And I don't think that we can single out one of these areas. I certainly don't have the luxury of doing that as a member of Congress.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I think there are two different worlds there. I think there are performative fights that are offensive, but the hurt is more narrow. Then there's things that they don't care about that hurt a lot of people. I don't think Donald Trump himself cares about trans people, but he's hurting trans people. I do think Donald Trump cares about hurting immigrants.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I think he wants to hurt immigrants because I think Donald Trump is the through line of his entire life. political philosophy for 40 years has been anti-immigration. But I think those are two different things, things he doesn't care about that have widespread harm and things that he doesn't care about that's performative, that's just about riling up the base and where the harm is more limited.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I think, obviously, we should be pushing back against the efforts to sanction or mandate discrimination against trans people writ large in this country. We should be fighting back against efforts to insert government between patients, providers, and families. We should be protecting trans service members who are serving this country. And...
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
In all of that, we should recognize that the most important thing for anyone who's being targeted by this administration is for us to slow this administration down. And unfortunately, because of the results of the last election, the main lever at our disposal is public opinion.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
We do have to recognize that we have to fight hard and fight smart, which means fighting and focusing on the issues where the public is with us. And therefore, we can turn the public as quickly as possible against Donald Trump.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
And doesn't mean we don't fight on other things, but it means we put focus on the central case that Donald Trump made to voters and the issue that voters care about the most, which is their economic well-being. And if we can shift public opinion against Donald Trump as quickly as possible, it throws sand in the gears of Donald Trump's authoritarian machine.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
Because right now we do live in a democracy. That is at risk. But we do live in a democracy.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I think we have to fight those fights in a smart way.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
And we need to message in a smarter way. Mm-hmm. person who is just tuning into this conversation or who has a diversity of thought. We have to create space for some imperfect allies. We have to recognize that if we're gonna have 50% plus one in support of basic non-discrimination protections, if we're gonna have 50% plus one in support of
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
protecting access to medically necessary care, that by definition will have to include some people in the 70% who oppose trans people participating in sports. That conversation needs to continue with people, but we can't dismiss them as bigots or remove them from our coalition because then we will have a ceiling of 30%.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
get in the way of me doing my job to the best of my ability, to the fullest.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I don't avoid anyone. Well, listen, I don't give them opportunities to, you know, punish me because I violate the rule that Johnson put in place. I use the restroom in my office. Which she knew you would have, so. Yeah. I don't go out of my way to aggravate things. But I just do my job, right?
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
If they're going to misgender me on the floor, look, a lot of folks, they're like, Sarah doesn't make a stink when we just say member from Delaware, Representative McBride. It's a way to respect Sarah and doesn't make them feel like they're saying something that they don't want to say or that they feel like they'd get politically punished for saying by gendering me correctly. Like, Fine. Fine.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
But there's always a risk that someone wants to make a thing out of it. I'm not going to not go to committee. I'm going to go and I'm going to speak. I'm not going to not go to the floor. I'm going to go to the floor and speak. And I'm not going to let them derail that work because they want 15 minutes of fame on social media. I'm going to go in the elevator. I'll say hi.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
If some of these folks pass me, I'll say, hey, how are you? In that folksy tone. Absolutely. Yeah. How are you, sir? Oh, boy. Well, it's just, you know, it's, I'm not saying it's the easiest thing and I'm not saying I don't get nervous, but, you know, it's what I'm there to do and it's what I signed up for. Mm-hmm.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
So, I always knew when I decided to run for this seat that there would be some members of Congress who would use my service to score political points and gain attention. And I always knew that that would include... misgendering very likely. You did? I just assumed that the performative nature of federal politics would result in people misgendering me.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
And one of the things I said to people during the course of the campaign is they're going to try to do this, and my job is going to be not to give them the response that they want. And I go in every day, you know, focused on my job, focused on serving Delaware, focused on introducing now two and soon to be three bipartisan bills.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
But I also go in recognizing that at any moment a member could decide to use my presence in a space to gain attention. It doesn't feel good when it happens. And, you know, the first time it happened was on the floor in my first floor speech. There had been some signs. People had sort of talked amongst themselves that it probably wouldn't happen.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
You mean your allies had, like, in a comforting way? Yeah, I think there had been maybe some conversations among some staff. And the tea leaves they thought suggested that it wouldn't happen. So when it did happen the first time on the floor.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
When I was introduced as the gentleman from Delaware, Mr. McBride.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
The chair recognizes the gentleman from Delaware, Mr. McBride, for five minutes.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
Thank you, Madam Speaker. You know, I've been intentionally misgendered. Before I came to Congress, I wasn't getting misgendered pretty much ever. And occasionally, I would get misgendered intentionally, someone trying to score points. You know, I'd be in a parade and someone would yell something out. And That doesn't bother me, right?
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
Like, I know they're doing it in a way that's crude, but, like, it's not news to me that I'm trans, right? I'm proud of who I am. That's not a problem. I didn't think it would be sort of emotionally heavy for me. It is a different thing when it's coming from the dais of the United States House of Representatives, right? It is a different thing when it's in the congressional record, and that does—
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
That does hurt more than it would typically. I think for me, in that moment, what hurt on the floor was I could see people in the gallery snickering. And I'm a person, right? This is the first time I'm on the floor of the House of Representatives. I'm nervous to deliver my first floor speech. And so I just went into my speech and delivered it.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
In the instance in committee where I did respond by saying, to a man who was presiding. That was a good.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I truthfully regretted saying Madam Chair right after I said it. Did you? I went back to my office and was not happy with myself. It's just not my style. I'm really here to focus on the job and to be serious. And like you can have humor and like sometimes it's right to just sort of respond in kind.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
But I don't think I fulfill my responsibilities to anyone, whether that's Delawareans or any other community I'm a part of, by consistently sinking to their level.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I think that there is no question that there are added responsibilities. There is added pressure to a first. I would never compare myself to Jackie Robinson, but one thing that after I started, people recommend I watch 42. And there is a really powerful scene in the start where the owner of the Dodgers says to Jackie Robinson... if you respond to a slur with a slur, they'll only hear yours.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
If you respond to a punch with a punch, they'll say you're the aggressor. Right. And I think that that is a apt description of the challenge that really most marginalized people face when entering a workplace. At the end of the day, the way I try to think about it, though, is the only way that I can guarantee that while I may be a first, I'm not the last,
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I'm not going to stand for a man. You know, if someone with a penis is in the women's locker room, that's not OK.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
is to just quite simply be the best member of Congress that I can be and to do the nuts and bolts of the job to the best of my ability. I'll make mistakes. There'll be times where I should respond to things and there are times where I shouldn't respond to things that I won't strike the right balance.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I am going to make mistakes and I think giving myself the same grace that I'm willing to extend to other people in navigating what is a reasonably unprecedented situation where
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I've tried to look at other examples to learn from, and I haven't been able to find someone who has entered Congress as a first when the identity that makes them a first is at the center of political debate and the district they represent isn't significantly or predominantly made up of that identity.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I think we are experiencing a significant moment of regression culturally in this country on all issues of gender. Public opinion is worse now than it was on almost every issue than it was five years ago. Meaning what? To what questions, for example? Almost every conceivable question on transgender rights. There are still trans rights issues that have majority support, but...
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
Every single poll I have seen shows less support now than there was five or six years ago on pretty much every issue, from non-discrimination protections, which still maintain majority support, military participation, which still maintains majority support, to other issues that either don't have, never have had, or now don't have majority support.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
And I think that there are a couple of reasons for that. One, it's a sustained right-wing movement. disinformation, misinformation, and fear-mongering campaign, that has an effect. And I think one of the things that people would say in 2015, 2016 to me is, oh my goodness, it feels like we're moving so quickly on trans rights, in a good way, right? And we'd praise it.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
And my reason for that was, I think, I said at the time, and I still think this is true, I think there's sort of a transfer of momentum from the LGB to the T, from marriage equality to trans rights, where people in 2015, 2016, right after marriage equality became the law of the land, They went, you know, I remember being wrong on marriage.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
And so there was that lesson of just because you don't understand something doesn't mean that you won't ultimately support it. And they kind of took that lesson and transferred it at the time to Trans Rights. And I think what it did was it created a false sense of security and It created a dynamic where public opinion was sort of a mile wide but an inch deep.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
It was sort of a house built on sand in some ways. I think that because of that, we perhaps as a community didn't do enough public education to build the foundation that the gay rights part of the movement had built when they got to 2010, 2012, 2014, with progress on the issue of marriage, where that public support was rooted in a knowledge foundation, an understanding of who gay people were.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
Ranking Member Keating, also wonderful. Mr. Chairman, could you repeat your introduction again, please? That is the biggest takeaway for me. One of the biggest takeaways for me is how much Congress is sadly a reality TV show.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
And I don't think that that foundation existed or to this day exists for trans people.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
Yeah, I mean, the torrent of hate that came in after that was really frightening and traumatizing for me. And after that experience...
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I mean, I just had never experienced that level of hate. Now it's essentially an everyday occurrence. Really? I mean, online, it's pretty incessant.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
I mean, I said the other week I live rent-free in some folks' heads, and it's... I mean, I will say stuff that have nothing to do with me, and literally just saying it will result in a torrent of anti...
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
trans commentary but like I mean that it doesn't bother me anymore because of that experience that I had then where I realized so I I got this hate including a lot of people telling me I should kill myself Yeah, what was the phrase? It's KYS. KYS, KYS, KYS. And I never would have expected that people telling me that I should do that would ever actually impact me.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
But at a certain point, the volume and velocity of it became so much that I couldn't help but feel it. And I remember after this, I remember thinking, I don't know that I can do this, do this work. And I went on this sort of information adventure to understand the psychology and bullying of trolling, and I came across a This American Life episode that really just allowed things to click for me.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
And meaning that the goal of the day is to get airtime. And in order to get airtime, the easiest way is to use the strategies of folks on Bravo TV shows where to get airtime, you pick a person, pick a fight with them, throw wine in their face, and that gets airtime.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
It was a Lindy West who wrote about her body and her weight a lot, and she would get trolled, and then she wrote about how much that trolling hurt her, and the troll reached out and apologized.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
No biggie. I was just doing my thing. And he acknowledged that he was struggling with his own weight.
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
You know, there's the old cliche that, like, the biggest closet cases are the biggest bullies. And in some cases, that's true. But it underestimates a larger, more universal truth, which is that everyone has an insecurity. And the thing about LGBTQ people is that if we are out...
Radio Atlantic
Sarah McBride Is Used to the Hate
We have taken that insecurity, that fear, that thing that society has told us we should be ashamed of, and we have not only accepted it, but in many cases, walked forward from a place of pride in it, and the bullies see that power, they see that individual agency in conquering our own fear, and they're jealous of it. And so when I see the things that people say about me writ large,