Unknown Caller
Appearances
Dateline NBC
Talking Dateline: Return to the Lake
Hi, my name is Gail. I've got a question about tonight's episode. Beverly Russell was Susan Smith's stepfather. Did the mother stay married to Beverly Russell after all this came out in court?
Dateline NBC
Talking Dateline: Return to the Lake
Hey, how you doing? You doing okay? I'm hanging in there. Well, that's good. I'm concerned about you and just wanted to know how you were doing. Well, I appreciate you calling. That means a lot.
Dateline Originals
Deadly Mirage - Ep. 4: David and Bathsheba
And I was freaking out. I thought, we cannot have Rob's murderer around our friends and their kids.
Dateline Originals
Deadly Mirage - Ep. 4: David and Bathsheba
Hey. Are you okay? Yeah. They're down here. How do you know? It was obvious there was someone posted at a corner.
Dateline Originals
Deadly Mirage - Ep. 4: David and Bathsheba
What type of marriage did you guys have?
Dateline Originals
Deadly Mirage - Ep. 4: David and Bathsheba
I was just calling to let you know that there's a bunch of people praying for you. I just wanted to see how your family's doing.
Dropouts
He Gave Up the Love of His Life... | Dropouts #255
Out of thumb? Does that say curtains? Curtains.
Dropouts
He Gave Up the Love of His Life... | Dropouts #255
Hello, Dropouts viewers. As you can see, I've taken your precious Jared.
Dropouts
He Gave Up the Love of His Life... | Dropouts #255
The game is simple. If you want him to get out of here alive, then all you need to do is subscribe to the Dropouts Patreon.
Dropouts
He Gave Up the Love of His Life... | Dropouts #255
Subscribing is easy. Just go to patreon.com slash dropouts pod. Should you fail to play the game, I will release a deadly nerve agent that will lead Jared to an excruciating end. The choice is yours, life or death. Let the games begin.
Guru: Don't Cross Kat
The Witches Who Work For You | 1
Finally, maybe this would lead rich and powerful people to acknowledge the barbaric nature of our health care system.
Guru: Don't Cross Kat
The Witches Who Work For You | 1
Leander, place front. Hi, I'm calling because I would like to know if you guys did a wellness check on the two missing Brazilian girls. Is an officer going to go over there and talk to them because they really need to?
New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce
Travis Returns to The Land, Jason Hypes the Birds and Drone Sweet Drones | Ep 115
Pity!
New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce
Travis Returns to The Land, Jason Hypes the Birds and Drone Sweet Drones | Ep 115
Hey guys. I was just wondering how you felt about being dethroned as the top trending pet name in sports. I didn't know that. I didn't know we were on top over.com. According to their 2024 top trending, Pet Names Report, Jalen Brunson is now the number one trending sports name, and now Kelsey is number two. Way to go, Jalen.
New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce
Travis Returns to The Land, Jason Hypes the Birds and Drone Sweet Drones | Ep 115
And I just wondered, because last year I saw that you were number one, so I just wondered how you felt. Just wanted to get your reaction on being dethroned by an NBA player. So please, let us know on the pod. Thanks.
New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce
Travis Returns to The Land, Jason Hypes the Birds and Drone Sweet Drones | Ep 115
Oh, beer.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
Dude, thank you so much for taking my call. I just, I love you, man. I appreciate all that you do. And I have found an extraordinary amount of help through your show.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
Okay, let me ask my question first, and if you want me to expound, I can expound. I would just like to know from a professional what the data is. Basically, what effect do romance novels and your wife reading them have on your marriage and your sex life?
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
Yeah, dude. So we've been married seven years, and my wife is my ride or die. We love each other. We've got a couple of kiddos that we're trying to raise, and things are fantastic. As far as our sex life goes, I just honestly feel that the expectations that these – romantic novels create.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
The expectations it creates are almost like impossible for me to reach, and I feel like it's having an effect on our romantic life and on our sexual life, but I don't want to bring it up Uh, and almost like accuse that of, of being a reason why I feel like, uh, she escapes to those fantasies, um, during sex instead of like staying present with me like we used to.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
Oh, dude, yeah. I mean, I'll just shoot you straight. So we're very open with that stuff. And we've talked about fantasies, and I feel like in some ways they've had a positive effect. And a lot of the fantasies that she has stem from situations in these books.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
And so, yeah, during sex, I can just feel her and see her, you know, go off into these fantasies, you know, mentally through her body language and so forth. And she'll even straight up say it and tell me. And while that helps her during sex, I feel like it's divided us in a way where it used to just be like the whole world shuts down. It's her and I.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
We communicate throughout it and now communication is lessened. It's far more quiet. All that stuff. I don't feel like she does just kind of go to these fantasies and I feel like In order for her, you know, to reach level sexually that she wants, she has to escape to those fantasies and almost escape reality. And I just, I don't like how it makes me feel. Yeah.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
I don't like how it is, you know, for a sex life. And so, yeah, I could just use some help on how to talk to her about it and what the data, I know that. you know, porn affects that, right? Like watching porn obviously affects and creates expectations that aren't realistic in sex.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
And I want to know if I'm crazy for trying to bridge the gap and connecting the two or, or what your thoughts are on it.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
Yeah, I think it does. And, you know, to add a little bit more context, my wife, like she... So we both own businesses and one of her like secondary things that she focuses on is digital minimalism. So she knows like the effects of social media stuff. She tries to stay away from it far more than I do. She's fantastic in that way.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
And she's not, you know, every day hiding in her closet, just indulging in these books. It's enough that she's created a handful of escape routes. And so to your point, yes, I do feel like since we talk about it and we're open with it, it's almost like permission to go there. And what used to be a handful of times, you know, what are you thinking about? Blah, blah, blah.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
Now it's like in order, in order for our sexual experience to be complete, if you know what I'm saying, she just has to, she just has to go there and just totally check out. And so, so yeah, you're, you're not wrong in a sense that it's almost like created this permission, but now it's,
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
It's almost like what used to be a handful of times is just every time, and we've lost our personal intimate connection where we're locked into each other.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
Yeah, I mean, I've even found... Go ahead. I'm sorry, I was just going to say, I've even found myself, like, to connect with her, just mentally going with her to these fantasies. That's right. And I just, I don't jam with it.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
Yeah. Agreed. Agreed. And she'll say again, like we're very open with it and she'll... Oh, what are you talking about? Yeah, of course. In certain times, like, it's with me in these other settings, but I just, again, the basis of it is I just feel like... You feel relieved. How I am currently. Yeah.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
And it's like, I'm not good enough here, like, performance-wise, emotional-wise. Like, I'm just not fulfilling it here.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
Yes. Yep. Right? The world shuts off.
The Dr. John Delony Show
My Husband’s Mistress Got Pregnant After I Had Our Baby
Oh, go ahead. Lay stuff out, and then the next conversation is how do we rebuild this thing?
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
What is your opinion or feedback about what you've seen about relationships being successful if there is a substantial age gap? of, let's say, 10, 15 years. What has been your understanding as to the overall satisfaction of those relationships and the ability for them to be able to be long-lasting and satisfying when compared to relationships with, you know, less than a 10-year age gap or so?
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
How do I know if I'm actually building something? If there is a substantial age gap? It seems to me unwise to reproduce things being this uncertain.
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
We're dealing with a pattern of misbehaviors with our son. Our 13-year-old throws tantrums.
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
Our son turned to some substance abuse.
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
So my question is, how do I know if I'm actually building something important or just staying busy to feel productive? Sometimes it seems like I'm doing a lot, but... I'm not sure whether the path is right for me. That's my question. And I also want to say thank you very much, Dr. Jordan Peterson, for completely changing my life with his views, mental models, and the book, 12 Rules of Our Life.
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
Thank you very much.
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
If you hear a baby screaming, she's hungry. But how does one distinguish between a relationship that requires personal growth and sacrifice to thrive and one that is fundamentally misaligned with one's deeper values and should be let go?
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
Yeah.
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
Yeah.
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
Thank you.
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
Dear Dr. Peterson, largely thanks to discovering your lectures as I was going through a very rough patch in 2017, I am now a former truck driver turned part-time security guard and full-time law student. You helped me rediscover meaning, culture, and rekindled the flame that drove me and I am forever grateful to you.
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
I am, however, less and less optimistic about the future of Western civilization, as it seems that a lot of what gave it meaning is evaporating in front of our eyes, particularly with wokeness working ever so hard to divide us all. It seems to me unwise to reproduce things being this uncertain.
The Jordan B. Peterson Podcast
548. Jordan Peterson Takes Your Call: Advice, Mental Health, Family Dynamics | Mikhaila Fuller
Do you have any words to rekindle my faith that we are still in fact able to create a world that is suitable for children to inherit?
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
Here's a small part of it.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
Let's go. I've always loved taking something pretty ordinary and elevating it. Surprising people with moments that let them know I was really thinking of them. What? This is probably one of the most glamorous moments of my life. I'm going to share some little tips and tricks. I see what color I gravitate to, and everything goes from there. And how you can incorporate these practices every day.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
That's what you want. You want that shape and texture. Come on. This is about connecting with friends. I love that we're doing this together for the first time. Making new friends. That is so good. We're family now.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
I've often said that gender-affirming care is health care, it is mental health care, and it can actually be suicide prevention care.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
I think I'm gonna take some medicine so I can kind of like transform into a boy, get surgery.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
After the surgery, I didn't really feel any better. When it stopped being a thing for adults and it started to be a, let's teach this to kids. Total lie. Manipulation. It's gaslighting. Please stop.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
He's a boy, not a girl. How could she do this to my son?
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
What they're talking about is hormonal therapy or sex reassignment surgery on children. I thought fixing me externally would fix me internally, but of course I was wrong.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
All I want to do is hold my son.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
Are you asking me to lie to parents? And he said, yes.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
This is an weaponized use of a parent's sympathy and caring and concern by the left to destroy your child. Let's tell kids that maybe they can be the opposite sex. Maybe they actually are the opposite sex.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
It is an evil thing to tell children that happiness lies on the other side of puberty blockers or double mastectomies.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
The left so badly wants to blur these lines. That's a five alarm fire. It's criminal.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
People see you and they're like, wow, look at you. You know, they're so excited. Here's a female black officer. Because it's not a lot of us.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
Governor, you got a second? Governor! Governor, I live here, Governor!
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
That was my daughter's school, Governor. Please tell me what you're going to do. I'm not going to hurt him. I promise.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
I'm literally talking to the president right now to specifically answer the question of what we can do for you and your daughter.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
Can I hear it? Can I hear your call? Because I don't believe it.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
I'm sorry. There's literally... I've tried five times. That's why I'm walking around to make the call.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
Why is the president not taking your call?
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
Because it's not going through.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
Why? I have to get cell service. So let's get it. Let's get it. I want to be here when you call the president.
The Matt Walsh Show
Ep. 1512 - How DEI Is Destroying L.A.'s Fire Department
I appreciate it. I'm doing that right now.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
So my husband, my ex-husband has not been able to hold down a job due to his health and he has not paid alimony or child support in five months. His only assets are his 401k and a little bit of the equity in the house that I got in the divorce that he gets, he gets that equity when I refinance, when I finished school.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
So I'm wondering if it's fair to ask him to cash out some of his 401k to pay his responsibilities. I know there's huge punishments, but he's working on disability and that can take a long time, but he's got no other assets to feed his kids.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
Yeah. Right. Like I'd rather he, you know, keep his kids alive now than, I don't know.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
I'm getting financial support from my family. I'm going through school. I've still got years to go before I can have any training that can pay anything more than fast food.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
So our housing, we refinanced this house when it was at the bottom of the interest. My interest rate is 2.6. My mortgage is $1,000. Okay. I can't rent a studio apartment in Utah for under a thousand dollars.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
Financial sense means that the kids and I stay here. If I was still married to him, we would keep this house. If we were still married, I would ask him to petition some kind of hardship to get into his 401k. His parents are paying his rent. I guess my parents are, my parents are paying my mortgage rent.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
He needs to do a bankruptcy because of his credit card debt since the divorce. And so he's threatening that he needs a bankruptcy. And I'm worried that this is an asset in his name.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
He has $250,000 in it. And how old is he? He's 42 years old.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
He's going to have to fight to get on disability. He hopes that he can rejoin the workforce someday, but based on his last 10 years of health, I don't see how it's possible. He's hit an early dementia.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
I just feel like I'm asking my family for help to take care of his children.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
Yeah, no, they are. And I have a plan. I'm getting through school as quickly as I can. I'm selling my blood money.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
I mean, doesn't he have it? Can't he get into that 401k? Isn't it better to use it now?
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
I don't know if he switched it over to his new wife and his kids, but I have a life insurance on him that I kept from our marriage.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
Is it fair if I, because my sister's supporting me and I'd like to pay her back someday. Is it fair to say, hey, if you forego the equity that I owe you, then you can not pay me the child support?
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
What's up? My question is, so I'd be paying off my only debt I have, which is my car payment tomorrow. So that would be clear. Congratulations. Oh, thank you. My husband has just a $7,200 car payment, and he just took out another line of credit for $8,000. So my question is, I have about $600 spare from my car payment. Should I help him pay back his line of credit?
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
But my worry is that he paid off $10,000 line of credit last year, and he took another $8,000 and put it in stock. So my worry is that if I help pay him, like help pay his line of credit back, he's going to take another line of credit, and we're going to be in debt still over and over again.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
So I didn't know he took out another $8,000. He was talking about it, but I didn't know actually he was doing it. All I said was, he just paid off the $10,000. He worked overtime to do that. And he said, well, I really want to do stocks. I was like, okay, I'll look into it. And he took out $8,000 for it. And I didn't think he would actually do it because he just finished it off.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
So he got into finances after reading Dave Ramsey books.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
He wanted to do something different, I think. He wanted to do stocks. He's into stocks now. I have no idea what... He's probably day trading.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
Well, I am calling because my husband and I, when we had some debt issues, we went to like a negotiation company, basically. They have us going into delinquency, and then they negotiate.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
Yes, and I was totally against it. My husband, it just, okay. So this is the reality. So they have negotiated. We have a total of about $38,000. in debt, uh, with three different creditors, uh, it's credit cards. Um, so two of our credit cards were negotiated or settled, I should say. And we spoke to the representative yesterday because I'm like, I want to know, can we get out of this?
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
What's the penalty? You know, what is this all entail? And so right now, We still have one creditor that has not been negotiated yet. And I'm trying to tell my husband, I'm like, I want to get out of this. I think we can handle it ourselves. But, you know, he's kind of like, well, we're in it now and we need to, you know, stick with it so we can get out of this.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
And I'm just trying to see if we do have a path to get out of it.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
So the fees and penalties, so we've been 10 months into the program. Once they do your negotiations, for every payment that you do, it's $347 per month.
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
credit card you know that they are negotiating just to fees so i mean it's insane and that's for 12 months is what it is you see why i'm not a fan of these companies oh absolutely let's help you get out of debt by screwing you over completely exactly but they're like the payoff right now for those two would only be 16 000 how much money do you guys make
The Ramsey Show
Be the Tortoise Not the Hare
So we are very much a budgeter, but we're about bringing home about $6,300. That's after taxes.
The Ramsey Show
You Don’t Need a Raise, You Need a Plan
Well, I used to be one of those guys. I didn't even think about it. And one of my buddies said, hey, the only reason to not have life insurance is if you hate your wife and kids. And I immediately went and got term life insurance. That's a gut punch. For decades, Dave, I've sat across people who've lost a spouse. They've lost somebody important to them. Me too. And they don't know what to do next.
The Ramsey Show
This Is How You Take Control of Your Own Life
I hate to admit this, but I don't always eat right. I know, I need to eat more fruits and veggies, but sometimes I just have to pound some chips because they taste so good. That's why I love my Field of Greens. It helps me eat healthy when I don't have much time. And each fruit and vegetable in Field of Greens was doctor selected for a specific health benefit.
The Ramsey Show
This Is How You Take Control of Your Own Life
Heart, lungs, kidney, metabolism, even healthy weight. And folks, I ain't getting any younger. It's super easy to mix with water. And here is the great part of it. I thought it might taste like grass, but it tastes great. And only Field of Greens makes this promise. Your doctor will notice your improved health or your money back.
The Ramsey Show
This Is How You Take Control of Your Own Life
So go to fieldofgreens.com slash Ramsey for 20% off your first order. That's fieldofgreens.com slash Ramsey to save 20% on your first order.
The Ramsey Show
There’s Always a Way out of a Financial Spiral
Like 300 carats. You know what I mean?
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
I just can't get these numbers to add up.
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
It's like we're never going to get out of this hole.
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
Credit card debt, does it ever end?
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
Maybe I can help. We sure could use it.
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
We've tried debt consolidation companies.
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
We've even taken out loans to help make payments. Well, you're not the only ones. Did you know millions of Americans live with debt they cannot control? That's why I developed this unique new program for managing your debt. It's called Don't Buy Stuff You Cannot Afford. Oh.
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
Let me see that. If you don't have any money, you should not buy anything. Hmm, sounds interesting.
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
I don't know, honey. This makes a lot of sense. There's a whole section here on how to buy expensive things using money you save.
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
Give me that. And where would you get this saved money? I tell you where and how in Chapter 3.
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
Okay, but what if I want something, but I don't have any money?
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
You don't buy it. Well, let's say I don't have enough money to buy something. Should I buy it anyway? No. Now I'm really confused. It's a little confusing at first.
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
Well, what if you have the money? Can you buy something?
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
Now take the money away. Same story?
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
Nope. You shouldn't buy stuff when you don't have the money.
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
That would be even, you know what I mean?
The Ramsey Show
Normal Is Broke... Do You Really Want To Be Normal?
Diana, I have to tell you, I don't know what you mean. You're crazy.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
It'd be with regard to spending, specifically credit card spending per month.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
So individually, I spend probably on average around $2,500, $3,000 a month on my credit card, and she's been closer to $5,000 plus per month.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Not everything. For instance, we pay our credit card off each month, our house notes taken out of our checking account, and our house note is really our only reoccurring debt, fortunately. What's your take-home plan? And that's kind of a hard question. So I work on commission, and through a job change a few years ago, it's been hard for me to – my wife's asked me the same question.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
It's hard for me to give an amount that stays the same. Yeah, but what's – $6,500 to $7,500 take home. And then a higher month could be closer to, you know, it could be $20,000 plus. It kind of just depends.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
I don't really have a good answer as to why we have them. I have had a credit card since I guess I got out of college, and I've fortunately always been able to manage it, at least as far as I can tell. I haven't racked up a bunch of debt, so I've just kept the credit card, and when my wife and I got married, got her one too.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Right. Initially for me, it was credit building. I just kind of got used to budgeting, comfortable budgeting with what I knew I was going to spend on my credit card. And I guess I'll point out A while back, like years ago when I originally had this conversation with my wife, she was paying some bills automatically on her card, and then I was paying some bills automatically on my card.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
We've since changed everything to be auto-draft from my card, the majority of it. So a lot of – some of my charges are necessities like bill, credit, cell phone bill.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Okay, so my question is, I have a debt with Chrysler Capital. I leased a truck in 2016. I turned it in 2020. I was way over in the mileage. They would not sell me the truck, which I was counting on them doing because it had over 100,000 miles on it. So I turned the truck in. They told me I owed them $91,255. So I started the debt snowball in March of 2022. I had $125,000 in debt.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
For sure. I mean, you hit the nail on the head. I would consider, the way I say it, is I think she's buying a lot of things. I hope that this call excites both of us and her to look at more long-term experiences and investments. Is she listening to this call?
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
And year to date, I paid off all my credit cards, and now I have $49,568. So I paid off about $60,000, $70,000. Okay. So I called Chrysler Capital, and I wanted to make a one-time payment. payment and, you know, pay it off, say, look, if this went to debt collection, you're going to get 10 cents on the dollar. That's, you know, if it's 49,000 debt collections, they're going to give you $5,000.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
I said, right now, I will give you $7,208. And that, if I gave them that, I would have paid the full sticker price for the truck, plus $12,156, all my lease payments paid on time, plus $79,011, which would be over $65,000. I think that's really, really fair. So they came back and they said, well, we could do $20,000. I said, don't you get it? I want this over and done with.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
The reason I want it over and done with is because in October, I have to get a full knee replacement, and I'll be out of work for three months. So... I'm trying to wrap this up. So she said, well, hold on. She said, well, we can do $15,000. I said, you're not listening. I don't have $15,000. Well, you could send us $7,208 and make payments. I said, I'm not doing that.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
I said, I'll call you back in a week. I'll call them back in the next week. I said, so what are we doing? She goes, best I can do is $15,000 and you can make payments. I said, so send me something in writing. And they absolutely refused to send me anything in writing as a payoff that my debt's been reduced to $15,000. If I call them up and ask what my balance is, it's still $49,568.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
No. Well, I'm dealing with Chrysler Capital, so they're in Texas. Okay. I live in Indiana. I'm a native New Yorker. I grew up in New York, and I moved to Indiana during COVID because my friend was working as a CNA. That's an essential job, and I didn't have any work. So I started here as a CNA employee. which is a temporary first time. How many, how many times have you gone?
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
She knows that I'm on. Yes. Oh, she does.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
She says, I can't do it. I'm sorry. You have that. She's on this. And supposedly she's a financial manager. I only talked to her.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
She she says, no, you have to pay it off first and then we'll then I'll get it approved. I said, so you have nothing. I said, you're you're saying me you need all the money. I said, don't you understand? I've been paying you six hundred dollars a week since April of twenty twenty four. Yeah, that's the problem.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Well, you know, she is a financial manager, so I don't know the next step up. I don't know who I have to ask.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Right. Yeah, I could do that.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Yeah, I'm going to have to stay on her.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Oh, well, just so you know, I grew up with all Italians, so that's as far as I'm going to go.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
But here's my question. Should I keep paying them?
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Well, no, it's not going to collections. We're going to handle everything in-house. So they do have a legal department. And at one point, I did get a lawyer to try to... you know, to get the debt reduced. And my not, my not so broke brother-in-law used to be a lawyer. So, um, but on what bounds would that be?
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
No, I, I, I was, my game plan was to buy the truck, finance the truck when the, um, When the lease was up. I was like, okay, the lease is up. I want to buy the truck. I'll give you a down payment and I'll make payments. That was my game plan. Oh no, it's got more than 100,000 miles. So the same people that leased me the truck won't sell it to me after I made all my payments on time?
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
In the lease contract, there's nothing in there that says if it's over the miles, they're not going to sell it to you. Nothing. I have a copy of the contract.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Well, I went way over in the mileage. I mean, if you read the contract. It is, you know, it's legit. You know, they really have, they really can enforce it if they want.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
That's that is true. We were separate when we got married and I thought it worked fine. We've since made it joint after our first child. And I do want to mention that we, so I try to max out my 401k. I come close or, you know, a couple of years, a little short of it. She contributes the, you know, she's not maxing it out, but she takes advantage of her company match. Now,
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
But she's working a little bit less now that we have three children. So she's not going to be able to max out her.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Hey, guys. My wife has joint ownership of a property worth about $20 million. Whoa. And, yeah, I wasn't sure if maybe it's time to – Cash that out and start putting it to work for us as a family. And how would I if I should even have that conversation with her?
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
It's my wife, her two sisters and her mother.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Exactly. It was in a trust for a while. The youngest sister just turned 18. So now it's, it can be sold. So, I mean, I just see it sitting there and it's like, maybe we should just take it now. Well, you know, I mean, I'm not expecting it to go down to nothing, but you know, that's enough to change our lives if we just cashed out right now.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
She thinks that this property is going to be such a headache. She honestly almost wants nothing to do with it. And I'm just thinking, you know, for how much it's worth, it's worth dealing with.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Is it just land? It's just land.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Right. There's some capital gains, but yeah. Sure.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
I think they're all, my wife and all of their sisters are kind of just whatever about it.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Because they have a weird dynamic about money and their family. And they honestly, I just don't think they want to deal with the potential of making their mother angry.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Through this real estate, and that's pretty much it.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
She owns a share of it also. She sees it as almost like her legacy and doesn't want to see it go away. And she's always been really bad with money. She's gone through bankruptcy before. She's considered doing it a second time recently. And part of the issue is that... They are concerned that she will find some way to put this as leverage or collateral for another loan or something. Okay, stop.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Her share would be $5 million.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
No, they're worried that she might find some way because my wife and her siblings, they've never actually sat down and talked to the lawyers or read the will or anything. So they're worried that she might have some way to like weasel it into her name. And so that's why they're almost all just like, I don't know. How do you even know?
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
We've been told by the mother-in-law.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
I would like to have at least $2,000 of that year marked towards savings, investing, charitable, other things, not just spending.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Yeah. And I have, and she, she's just said to me, you know, I, I don't expect to get anything from my mother when she passes. I don't expect to get anything from this. I don't, I just assumed that this is going to be a non-factor in my life. So I just want nothing to do with it.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Because the mother-in-law, she talked to my wife recently who then talked to me. She talked to my wife about potentially selling it and to pay off her debt. And of course my wife would get her share and she, I wasn't around when this conversation happened or I would have been telling my wife, yeah, you should probably do this or really consider it.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Hey, good afternoon. Thank you all for having me on. You bet. As I said, my name's Taylor. I'm married. I have three children. I have a five-year-old, three, and a one-year-old. My wife and I would like to get some help and some advice from y'all in regards to our budgeting.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
So when my wife finally told me, I was like, well, why didn't you say, yeah, let's do this? And she was just like, oh, I don't know. Okay.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
It was their grandmother. The father-in-law is not really in the picture.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Yeah, that's pretty accurate.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
That's not an answer. We exchange pleasantries and we're friendly with each other. We talk.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
I wouldn't so much say that we have a money problem, but I would say that we have a problem agreeing on what to do with our money. And I think Dave said it before. I think one of us could be considered more of a spender, whereas the other could be considered more of a saver.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
What's your income?
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Learn more at RamseySolutions.com slash SmartVestor.
The Ramsey Show
Your Financial Spiral Will End When A Proven Financial Plan Begins
Right. Trying to find a happy medium so that we can both be happy, enjoy life while also saving. And more importantly, I just possibly don't want to work forever. I'm happy to elaborate on that from here.
The Ramsey Show
Quit Trying to Outearn Your Stupidity!
If you run a business or you know somebody that does, you know the truth. The truth is it's hard. It's really hard. When you're self-employed, you typically have a jerk for a boss.
The Ramsey Show
Quit Trying to Outearn Your Stupidity!
It's Holy Week in Jerusalem. Crowds welcome Jesus as king. Rebellion is in the air. Jesus operates outside our jurisdiction. Rome will descend on us all. But instead of taking the throne, Jesus turns the tables.
The Ramsey Show
Quit Trying to Outearn Your Stupidity!
The world will never be the same. Coming soon to theaters. The Chosen Last Supper. Get your tickets now.
The Ramsey Show
The Road to Financial Freedom Is Paved With Grit
This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. You've probably heard people talk about different kinds of flags in friendships and romantic relationships. Red flags, green flags, beige flags.
The Ramsey Show
The Road to Financial Freedom Is Paved With Grit
Listen, it can be helpful to look for patterns or unsafe behaviors in potential relationships, but all those labels can distract from what's really important, your values, and whether you and your potential partner are willing to wake up every day and choose to honor each other's values. And look, I know it can be tough sometimes to even know what's important to you in a relationship.
The Ramsey Show
The Road to Financial Freedom Is Paved With Grit
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The Ramsey Show
The Road to Financial Freedom Is Paved With Grit
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The Ramsey Show
The Road to Financial Freedom Is Paved With Grit
I didn't even think about it. And one of my buddies said, hey, the only reason to not have life insurance is if you hate your wife and kids. And I immediately went and got term life insurance. That's a gut punch. For decades, Dave, I've sat across people who've lost a spouse. They've lost somebody important to them. Me too. And they don't know what to do next.
The Ramsey Show
Stop Overthinking and Start Taking Action
As an investor and a person of faith, when your mutual funds and ETFs put your money into the dark side, you might feel a disturbance. Well, good news. Timothy Plan offers investments for people who want to be intentional about where their money goes.
The Ramsey Show
Stop Overthinking and Start Taking Action
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The Ramsey Show
Stop Overthinking and Start Taking Action
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The Ramsey Show
Stop Overthinking and Start Taking Action
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The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Yeah. Yeah. That's just, that's heartbreaking. And for whatever it's worth, I'm proud of you for putting up a boundary with one of your kids.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And Lily, I want you to hear me so clearly. This is for you and everybody listening. Conflict deferred is conflict amplified.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Avoiding any sort of conflict, dispute, I don't want to pick my car up, yada, it will come back to haunt you. That $400 already turned into $3,000.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Y'all could have just gone to pick up the car, paid 50 bucks, and set it on fire in a parking lot, and it would have been cheaper than what y'all are doing now.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Same thing with the condo, same thing with his retirement, same thing with his insurance. Everything he's got facing him, conflict deferred is conflict amplified. So let's just head into these problems, one after the other after the other.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
We don't ever talk, we don't talk about enough. The other side of boundaries is that when we can put up a boundary to keep ourselves safe and comfortable, kind of create the world we want to exist in, other people can just walk away. And we don't talk about that enough. Boundaries looks good on Instagram, but man, there's a reality to it that can be heartbreaking.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Hang on the phone. We're going to give you Financial Peace University. I'm going to hook you up. And I want you to watch all nine videos and begin to take control of your money. Sounds like your dad's going to need you by his side in that back half.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Yeah, the problem is people just rack up fees. Yeah, yeah. That idea that I'm just going to not deal with this. I'll deal with it later. Like the student loans, they don't go away. The car at the impound lot, the insurance premium you forgot to pay. Yesterday we talked to somebody, it lapsed two days and her husband died. Like this stuff just doesn't go away.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
We just got to continue to head into it and head into it and head into it.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Okay, but hold on. I feel like you're giving me two messages. Message number one, I want my son to have some skin in the game like I did. Because it made me appreciate the... The scratch and clawing that is to be a new pilot and all those crummy shifts you're going to have to take. You took it more seriously in class because you're paying for it too.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
But then I hear you saying over and over, man, this is just really expensive. So have you, which is it? Do you want him to like have some skin in the game or did you already have, like you want to get him off the payroll and have this $80,000 go to a new truck? No, no, no.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I think there's truth to that. I think that's fair.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I don't love the idea of you becoming the bank of dad. I do love the idea of a kid having skin in the game. I love the idea of maybe for the rest of this summer and for the summer after his junior year and the summer after his senior year before flight school that he works for the business of mom and dad's house. And he earns, y'all keep an hour log. Y'all figure that out.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I don't love him starting the world indebted to you financially. You came along in a season when jobs were available, when technology wasn't threatening everybody's everything. I hate the idea that he would be 25 or 20 grand in the hole to dad. And then there being a hiring freeze or an economic issue or something. And now y'all can't even be in the same room together.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Or every time he takes a girl on a date, you're You're like, where's my money? It changes the whole relationship.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Yeah. I mean, if you think that the kids, their kids are in danger now, I think just not only as a grandma, but as a citizen, you have a responsibility to make a phone call, right? Yes. Yes. Yes. I think it's cruel to give somebody who's struggling with heroin a big inheritance because it's going to kill it.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Where is this coming from on your wife's side?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Let me tell you, dude. I bought a car for $1,000 when I was in high school. And I put $100 down. And I thought my dad covered the other $900. He thought I paid it. And that $900, dude, drove a wedge between us. I mean, it had a ripple effect that was way beyond $900. Wow. Because I thought he and he thought I, and then it became this embarrassment.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And then, I mean, it just became a thing on thing on thing. The guy then who sold me the car was a great man who passed away. The whole thing got sideways. It was over $900. And this is way beyond that. And it worked out for you and your dad. And George and I would not have a job if every one of these things worked out. And so I can't in good conscience tell you to become a bank for your son.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
and have him graduate saying, I owe you, or you owe me. This makes me just sick to my stomach, man.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Would he say that? Or is it easy compared to what you went through? Back in my day, I had to walk uphill naked in the snow.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Not going how I needed it to. I mean, both George and I have accounts for our kids to go to college. I want to support them. And also, I'm going to have an expectation that I'm going to preset with my kids that they work, they maintain a GPA, and purchase a new pair of trees. So all that stuff's good. Yeah.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Absolutely. And that way you can say you didn't totally lose. You can tell your wife, oh, I have a third option. And that way we can all say face together because I want to be on your side too, man. I'm going to tell her I called. Ask your son, who is a junior, right? He's a junior now? He's going to be a junior. He's a rising junior? Okay.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I want you to take him out to breakfast this Saturday, and I want you to say, hey, here's the reality of flight school. It's $80,000. My dad and I had an agreement that I borrowed $25,000 from him, and he covered the rest of it. I don't want to be your bank. I always want to be your dad. But you have to have some skin in the game.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And so your responsibility over the next two weeks is to write me a proposal for what skin in the game is going to mean for you. Okay. And put the onus on him. And that way when things get dicey three or four years from now, when he's exhausted and doesn't want to do X, Y, or Z or whatever y'all agreed on, you can say, hey, you wrote the terms to this and I agreed to them.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And so how much money are we talking here?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And so you're shifting the skin of the game onto him. What's the investment in this thing worth for him? And let him come back to you on that. And it has a way of leveling the playing field when you're talking to an adult, a rising adult child. So give that a shot. I like that plan.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Today's question comes from Owen in Washington. Owen writes, My partner and I have been together for two years and have lived together for one. We frequently talk about getting married. I've brought up opening a joint house account to split expenses for housing and possibly utilizing it as a savings vehicle, but this idea was shot down quickly. All right, you're dating well, Owen.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
We know how much the other earns, but that's about it. When is it time to share our financial situations, and when is it a flag if one partner doesn't want to share at all? If marriage is the path we're on, then this seems like a necessary first step. Yes, you should share financial situation before you decide to become roommates.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Yeah. Yeah, I would say it's a huge, humongous, gigantic... Calling all cars red flag if you're considering a long-term relationship with somebody, you're considering moving in with somebody, which I don't recommend for multiple reasons, or if you're choosing to marry somebody and they won't talk to you about their financial situation. Yeah, huge, giant red flag.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
and getting trying to get cute about it and being like well let's create a super house fund that might be like part this part savings account part utility but no because then you're gonna be like you talk about like venmoing your spouse gosh like hey i got i got arby's last night for 11 so just venmo me well i got coffee so it's only 238 like just keeping score like that's exhausting oh my
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Back in August, I took out the trash. So you have to. Exactly. So it'll never end.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
What about in retirement funds or anything?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Well, we joke on the show about playing house. And when people move in together, even though all the data suggests otherwise, there's this idea that we're going to move in together and we're going to kind of like practice.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Well, not even that. We're going to practice marriage and see if we're compatible. And what anyone who's been married more than five seconds will tell you is every marriage goes through seasons where we would not be together except we're married. And we have to figure this out. We're anchored to the same boat and we're going to figure this thing out.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And so this idea that we're practicing for something beyond just dating, it doesn't bear out in the data, right? You'd think that people who live together, their marriages are better. It's not, right? They end up not being. So when we say play house, Really seriously, that's what's happening. We're pretending we have a long term relationship or we're practicing for something.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
But it doesn't work that way. And so what I would say is to back all the way out. And it sounds like I'm just reading between the lines here. And I'm speculating a lot. Obviously, one of you. is probably moving in because they like the benefits, the roommate with benefits, the intimacy benefits, the split cost benefits, and one of you was practicing for marriage.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And so I think this is one of those, let's swipe an arm across the table, clear the deck, and say, where are we? Or as the kids say... DT, DTR define the relationship.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
That's awesome. One of my students, one time I was like, yeah, we're having a DTR tonight. And I was like, I don't know what that means. So it was good. Yeah. It was a long time ago. They probably moved on to new things now, but I think it's still a good term, but you have to decide what are we doing? What are we doing?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
It doesn't work like that. No, and also don't be a weird, rangy person who's like, hi, my name is so-and-so. My net worth is this. How much debt do you get? Don't be that weirdo either. Do you want to see my budget? Exactly. Whoa. When do you see my?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Hold on one second, Kirsten. Kirsten, talk directly into your phone for me. I can't hear you.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Much better, much better. So you've got credit card debt.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I hate to say it, it's going to sound so callous. So I'm only saying this because I care about you. You've got to go get a job and earn that money. There's not a magic way here.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Awesome. If they say you're hired, say, can I start right now?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Oh, yikes. Yeah, but you got to do something. You got to do something.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
maybe dog walking that's the best that's all i can think of get on there today you'll get healthy in the process but but like put on facebook marketplace or next door app like right now right when you get off this phone and start making money tonight like it's it's it's this do you mean like selling stuff no start dog walking tonight how old are you okay i'm 25 okay how much debt do you have total
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Well, can you do something like, and I'm asking George this on your behalf, he's the expert here, but could she open up 529s and fully fund them for all the grandkids? Absolutely. Which specifies that money is going to be used for education only. And if they choose to not go to school, they just go straight into the workforce and never need any sort of training, which is almost no job.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Stay on the line. We're going to send you Financial Peace University. I can just bang my head on the desk, but I think you need to watch these videos and not just the clips on YouTube. I want you to watch all nine videos and do exactly what it says.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
But if they want to go to college, they want to go to trade school, they want to go to nursing school, that can be used for that. But if not, it just can roll into a Roth with the kids down the line. That would probably be something I would look to do.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Tell me about your autoimmune challenges.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Yeah, but it's exacerbated greatly by... Emotional distress, family stress, relationship distress, right?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Okay, so here's what I want you to commit to. Will you commit to something for me?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Don't give up on yourself. Okay? Because I can hear in your voice, you have a sense of shame about your situation. And that sets your body on fire from the inside out, right?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Okay. So before we get off this call, George is going to walk you through the money part of it. I'm going to hook you up with my friends at BetterHelp. I'm going to give you three months of therapy for free. And you can do it from your house. You don't have to go anywhere, okay?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I want you to talk to somebody. But you have to promise you're going to work, not fight. We're done fighting. Your body's exhausted. but we're gonna metabolize some of this stuff and we're gonna make peace in our body from the inside out and we're gonna talk to somebody and connect with a counselor and to connect with a therapist and we're not gonna give up, okay? Thank you.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
This is a right now, it's not a death sentence, it's not forever, okay?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Your family would have plenty of time for your husband to work this job, which is admirable, possibly at a second job, which he's not going to see you, not see the kids. It doesn't matter. We're surviving right now while also getting up at 4.30 in the morning and applying for other jobs.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Why are you thinking about this right now?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Yeah. Ta-da! And by the way, can I make you feel better? I did the same exact thing. I was in my early twenties.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I kind of freaked out, called one of these companies. I called to check in like four months later and my debt was exactly the same. I just kept paying them money. And then I started getting letters. And then when I called the company, they were like, no, it's cool, bro. Just like, just like, don't worry about the letters. And I don't know. None of it smelled right.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And I just said, y'all can go buy a box of hair because I'm out.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I'll let George get into the nitty-gritty. The two big concerns I have, number one is it's a lot of thinking down the road for something that's just getting started. There's no assets yet. There's no money. And so if the company – I know Dave did that with his – like his three kids are owners of the company – And so I don't have the nuances.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
George may know the nuances, but I know Dave is technically not an owner of this company. He's a shareholder, the single shareholder, and he's the CEO. He makes the decisions, but he's not the owner. But there was, what is it, 25 years or 20 years they did this before, built up a pretty substantial business before they made that move. And so, yeah, George, what do you think?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
My guess is before they become owners of a company, they have to have, they've got to be in the business.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Or even at the – well, no, they're already growing up. I had a whole other idea if they were really young, but they're not.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
That's a great idea. I would hire you to come do that in my house.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I love it. Next part. I'm in Tennessee. We don't have all those taxes here, so.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Or you can leave it to a trusted, like an executor of your estate or an executor of a trust who... could have a written explanation of what you want done with the money. If my kids come and they prove that they're clean with six months of drug tests or whatever, then they get their inheritance or automatically this executor would fund 529 plans.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Probably the number one pushback we get from folks who when we say cut up your credit card is they always talk about, yeah, but I get free flights or I get free hotel points. And so if you go to Holiday Inn all the time and Holiday Inn, I have a buddy who travels a lot for work and Holiday Inn is like a frequent flyer, frequent rewards member or you use Southwest, they give you points.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
That's fine. That's inside the company that's saying, hey, we want to discount you further for business. That's fine. But when you're using these credit cards and you get points on flights and whatever, you show this in your book, but here's yet another article detailing this.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
When you sit on a flight paid for with credit card points, a single mother who just had an emergency expense is paying for that flight. The credit card company is not your friend. They're not hooking you up for using that. They're not like, hey, you've used us a bunch. We're going to give you a free airline ticket.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
They're taking from somebody who can't afford to pay their bill or who is struggling, and that person is paying your bill. And so I just want people to think through, man, if you're using cards just for the, I get free flights every year. Cool. But somebody's paying for that flight.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And that ultimately, um, I'm not trying to be goody two shoes when I, before I worked at Ramsey, I had a move with a comp with my company and the company is going to pay for the move, but I had to front load it. I went and opened up a rewards card so I could get the flight points. And it wasn't until I was literally on the drive and I was like, wait a minute. who's paying for this flight?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
These guys aren't my friends. And when I dug into it, it was like, oh my gosh, it's delinquent borrowers. Folks who are broke and who are struggling, they're paying for my flight or my hotel. And I want out of that system completely. I don't ever want to be a part of a predatory system like that if I can in any way help it. So I just want to opt out of the whole gross game, man.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
You can decide if you think things are going to happen on the road, but there's also a chance you live another 25 or 30 years.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And just so we know, between 2020 and right now in 2024, $100 billion more credit card company firms, credit card firms made from interest payments. It went from $76 billion to $170 billion in 2024.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And by the way, I love that this person called this out. Once you have one issue, your brakes go out on your car, suddenly you need to, you know, you're driving an old, old used car. because that's what you can afford and somebody gave it to you, but now your local community has another $100 because it's a hybrid fee and they don't have the gas revenues in your community.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And suddenly you put something on the credit card. You just are like, dude, I have to. The washer breaks. Your kid needs a pair of shoes for made the cross country team and you swipe it. At 20-something percent interest, it's so hard to get out of that cycle. Once you swipe it once, man, it's so tough to get out of it. It's not worth it.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
You're going to need it. You're not going to use it. You're going to have to have it, right?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Man, if you can avoid playing this game at all, get out of the game. Just opt out of the whole system.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
hated there is let's be honest there's idiots who are like what are buying burritos with clarna or whatever yeah that person exists right but that's outside the the bell curve the majority of americans are trying to make stuff got way more expensive the last five or six years and it got way way more expensive recently people are just trying to survive and they're swiping this thing and it's once you get in that cycle man it is tough tough to get out of it's like a rip current mm-hmm
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
You have a whole third left to go. You're like halfway through the third quarter. You can't quit the game now.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Heaven sounds better. I know, but listen, can I tell you something?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
There are mothers right now, and I know this because one out of four, 25% of the calls that come into my show are about estranged families. It's horrible. Somebody's cut off their parents, the parents have cut off their kids or whatever.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Yeah, those are two things you and I talk about a lot, and we're just hanging out as bros. That's what we do.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
That's right. And the proof is in the pudding. We usually sell about half the tickets for the following year right there at that event. But people will say, I want this to become a part of the regular rhythm of our life. We want to get away for a weekend and go reimagine it. We're already working on the curriculum this year. It's going to be all brand new stuff, and I'm pretty hyped about it.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
We intentionally, yeah, everybody's hurting out there financially. And it's $749 plus getting to Nashville plus staying here for a few, that's expensive. We know that. It's not for everyone. But we intentionally make it cheaper than every other event because we want people to be able to come.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
What an amazing resource you would be to a 45 or 50-year-old mom whose kids won't talk to her anymore. Or to a group of young parents, young dads, young moms whose parents are too busy YOLOing it up in their 70s and 60s and won't talk to them anymore. You can start a small group in your local community and provide 20 years of just life-giving wisdom and kindness. So don't cash out on me now.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I could sell like a Barbie Jeep for $1,500. Yeah, and it's not a great bike.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Please don't do this. Whatever you're about to say, don't do it. Are you going to try to take out a credit card and roll the balance and try to beat the 0% for X number of months?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
There's one way to do this. One. You ready? This is a hack. This is the Instagram YouTube hack. Are you ready? get three jobs and work like crazy for six months and pay this stupid thing off, it's killing you. And by the way, 100% chance this blows up and ruins your relationship with your mom and your brother. That's the only way. That's the hack.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Okay, you get to pick your poison. Credit cards don't offer you introductory 0% hookups because they're your friend. They know that if they can get a college student like you, there's a 100% chance that something will go wrong with this car and you don't have any cash.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And so you'll buy a tire... And then you'll pay the minimum because something else is going to come up. And then mom's going to call and say, hey, I don't feel good. Can you come visit me? And you're going to put like, okay. And you're going to put something else on that credit. It's just how it happens. You know how I know? Because it happened to me. It happens to millions and millions of people.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Do you know how much more credit card interest credit card companies make in 2024 than they did in 2020? No. A hundred billion more dollars.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And I sold it to my little brother for 300 bucks and he drove it to college until him and his friends all pitched in and they drove it out into a field until it exploded.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
You're halfway through the third quarter. You got to play all the way to the end of the bell.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I got you. Totally got you. I'm not beating you up for what happened. You made a choice and it is what it is, what it is. What I'm trying to tell you is there's only one path out now. And you can try.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I'm just telling you, millions of Americans are drowning because they just tried to move stuff around instead of clenching their fists and hitting right into the middle of it, swinging as hard as they could. And I'm only telling you this because I love you. There's just one way. There's just one way through. And dude, I have a nine-year-old daughter. You're just my daughter just 10 years from now.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And I would tell you the same exact thing. You just have a stupid tax of $5,000. You're upside down in a car that you don't even drive. And that your brother is leeching off of you. I love him, but he's leeching off of you. And your mom's like, woohoo, I'll just kick in on the insurance, like whatever. And nobody's, everyone is losing here.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And there's only one way through it. And that's just to suck it up and go get $6,000 and pay this stupid thing off.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And you can punt it till after you graduate. I'm just telling you there's going to be a thing that happens between now and then. And you've already cracked the door to getting a credit card to solve your immediate problem.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
You just said that as though you just figured that out. That was incredible. We've been together for more than half my life, and I just had this discovery. How long has he been irresponsible?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Yeah. Does this sound like a romantic relationship?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
um we opened up the relationship like eight years ago to try to fix that yeah that that usually works whenever couples aren't working out together just like hooking up with a neighbor always works that's good that works great okay so so here's the deal here's a question like he's not on the phone to defend himself his mother and his parents are having challenges you're the only person on the call yeah how old are you again
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
43. 43. Let's just pretend you have 50 years left to go. You're not even halfway done yet. You cannot do one single thing about anything that's come before this phone call.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
You're holding a pen and a blank piece of paper. You get to decide what story you write next. End of discussion. Doesn't matter about him. He has shown you his cards. I won't marry you. I won't participate in life with you. I won't do any sort of like I won't live in any sort of reality at all. And there's probably a million reasons why partridge in a pear tree.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
We're not going to go through all that. The only thing that matters is you're holding a pen and a blank piece of paper. What do you write next? I mean, here's the deal. It's going to be hard to break up. It's going to be hard to, you're going to have the sunk cost fallacy. Like I've already given 20 years and I might as well just have another 50 miserable years.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
So when I die, I've got 70 miserable. You can do that. And you can also stay in this thing. That's going to be hard. The only options you have is a hard choice. Choose your heart.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Hold on, hold on. I don't care about a year ago. I care about right now. A year ago is past.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
He's a grown man who's made choices for 20 years. For 50 years. Yeah. Not 50. For about 40 years, he's made choices. Yeah.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
They don't matter. You've had those for years and years and years and years. You had one when you decided to sleep with other people because you thought that would fix it. You had those when you were like, when are you going to marry me? And he's like, oh, you know. You've had those and had those and had those and had those. They don't matter. It doesn't work. Of course he was shocked, by the way.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
He's got a sugar mama that's going to take care of him. He doesn't have to worry about anything. And by the way, his family doesn't even have to worry about anything. You'll just fix it. You always have.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Do you have any girlfriends in your community that you can just go sit down and just unload on? Just say, hey, I need you just to buckle up because I got a story for you. I don't know what to do.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Okay, you need to do that. I'm not going to be on the hook for telling you you need to leave this guy. That's your choice. You're a grown woman. Yeah. I'm going to tell you the situation is profoundly unhealthy for everybody involved.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
You all have been roommates for years, and roommates move out.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And roommates choose to stay. You get to choose, but I just want you to take 100% ownership, not of all the things we should have said and didn't do. What am I going to do next? And whatever you decide to write is going to be hard.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
But I want you to sit down with a friend, maybe a local counselor, and... Just get all of this stuff out because I want you to go towards something. I want you to go to somebody who cares about you, a new job, new relationship, a new safe place to live. I want you to go towards something. Don't just run into the night screaming because you're going to end up right back in the same situation.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Hey, what's up? Dr. John Deloney here. The new dates have dropped for the money and marriage getaway over Valentine's Day weekend in 2026. This is your chance to hit pause on everything in your life and reconnect with your spouse over a long weekend in Nashville, Tennessee. Me and my friend Rachel Cruz will be digging into topics like sex, money, communication, and more.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
This weekend is happening on February 12th through the 14th, and early bird prices start at $749 per couple, but the prices will be going up soon. Get your tickets today at ramseysolutions.com slash events.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I'm going to ask you. Please, please, please. Hey, Rosa, listen. You got a ton going on, okay? Let's knock these out one thing at a time, okay? Because real quick, what anxiety does is it begins to go and then, and then, and then, and it spools on us, right?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And you haven't slept in the last week, have you? I know. Please, please, please do not put your house on the auction block for a short-term problem, okay? I want to not promise you, but almost guarantee you something. Your husband has not told you the full truth about why he got fired.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Hold on. Hold on. You're jumping right back into solutions. I'll back out. Cool. He got fired from that. There's one solution right now. He's got to get two jobs today at Walmart and at Home Depot. And then he's got to drive tomorrow morning and he can apply for jobs later. Y'all don't have any money. This isn't the time for hacks. This isn't the time for debt consolidation.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
This isn't the time for putting your house on the block. Because one thing you've proven to yourself over the last 20 years is something always comes up and the worst case scenario usually happens.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
No, don't do consolidation. You're just moving dead around. It's like putting Spanx on. If I put on a bunch of Spanx, it doesn't make me weigh less. Right. It just makes a particular pair of pants fit better.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Have you sat down and said, I need you to swallow your pride on this one? I don't even say that because he'll fight you on that. I don't have any pride. Can you say, hey, for three months, I know you're grinding, but we got to go make some money.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
He's just trying to stick it to his old boss. And the moment he gets a job, they cut it off. How much are these cars worth?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Yeah, we can't help you. I mean, if every option you're putting up against, he won't, he won't, he won't, then at some point you have to decide, do I want to be safe or not? And if he is really as unhelpful and won't speak to you and whatever as you say he is, you're in a situation that is unsafe.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Get with some girlfriends in your local community that are friends of yours and sit down and walk through the challenges here. You may need to see a local counselor. You got big challenges ahead of you, but please don't take out a HELOC on your house.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Hi, guys. Thank you for taking my call. It's actually a privilege and an honor to talk to you guys.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Well, I got introduced to the Ramfee program about 10, 11 years ago, and right away I got term life insurance because my bride and I, we have five kids. I didn't realize that it was going to be up in 10 years because I thought I got it for 20. It's coming up to end here soon, and I'm trying to do my due diligence and try to get new term in life, but I've been denied twice by two different places.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I do have a supplemental term with my work, and I have a little one that I got through the NRA. But it's nowhere near the 10 times amount of money I bring in. And let me tell you, I still got four kids at home. And God knows, I don't want to leave the burden of having to take care of me. Why'd you get denied, bro?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Well, the last one, I finally got clarity. The biggest one is my BMI. I'm six foot four, 330 pounds, and I'm down almost 40 pounds. Congratulations. Good for you. Thank you. So that's the big one, you know, a little bit of high blood pressure. I'm right on the cuff of diabetes. My doctor put me on a diet, which is helping me lose the weight. Okay. I don't know what else to do.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
If something were to happen, you know. Well, can I just tell you, you're talking to just three dads right here. Me and you and George are all three dads. And all of us have had that night where we're laying in bed like, dude, if something happens to me, right? And so I hear it in your voice. Yeah.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
If what you're telling me is right, that you're pre-diabetic or right on the line with metabolic challenges and you're already a big guy and you're obese and you're struggling with X, Y, and Z, can this be the moment that you say, I'm going to commit to being at my youngest kid's wedding? Because all of what you just explained to me, I'm going to say this because I love you, is a solvable problem.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
OK, it is working with a with you continue to work with your doctor. You know what? I'm going to hook you up. Train well supports my show. It's a workout and a personal trainer in an app. It's amazing. I use it. My manager use it. My wife uses it. Kelly, the producer of my show, uses it. I'm going to hook you up with three months for free. But you got to promise me you'll use it.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Okay. I will. And if you've never worked out before, or if you're like me, been working out for 30 years, it doesn't matter. They'll, they'll up the game with you. And it's a personal trainer that walks with you. Okay. But listen to me. Okay. This is a solvable challenge is we've had calls on the show where someone's got brain cancer. Somebody's got a heart defect or a heart transplant or whatever.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
That's right. My bride and I, we're still working baby step two. We have, because of my bride, you know, she's the neck of the family. We have about one month's worth of emergency fund, and we're working the baby steps slowly but surely.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
We initially came close to being debt-free back in the very beginning of 2020. COVID hit us hard, and we fell back into debt.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Work-wise, I went from working 50-plus hours a week to less than half, and We focused on the four walls and utilities and food.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I want to say about $40,000 or $50,000 total. What do you make right now? Last year, I averaged about $38,000. My bride, $71,000. What do you do making $38,000 a year? I'm a soils tech. I essentially go out and test compaction levels of construction sites before they build new roads or new buildings. My regular wage is $20 an hour.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Every once in a while, I get the prevailing wage, which is four or five times that.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Here's what I'm hearing. Can I tell you what I'm hearing? And we don't have a ton of time, and so I want to get right to the middle of it. You don't look in the mirror and respect you. And I don't want you taking another step that you don't respect the dad you are, the husband you are, the man you are. Fair? That's fair. You're a dad who loves his kids, don't you? Absolutely.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Okay, you're worth more than $38,000 a year, brother. And I know you feel good in your job and it feels secure in X, Y, and Z. You can make that work in a Starbucks. And so I want you to hit the street and find a job. I don't care what the job is, but I want you to find a job that's making more than $38,000 a year. I'm not knocking people that that's all they can do.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I had this happen to me once. I sold my car to my little brother. And my brother, I mean him and his buddy, it was not a great car. And they just destroyed it. It was pretty hilarious. But they left it like in a field somewhere in nowhere, Texas. And then I got a call like five years later saying I owed $2,000 in taxes.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
But if you know how to test soil compact levels and work with contractors and deal with all that nightmare stuff and plus run your own small thing, then you can do a bunch of jobs that will pay you double or triple or quadruple what you're making right now.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
But it's going to make you bust out of your comfort zone. Same as going to the gym. Same as getting on a diet plan and not skipping and changing diets every four weeks and trying this. I'm going to try fasting. I'm going to try keto. I'm going to try vegetarian. I'm just going to be consistent for the first time in my life. And I'm also going to hook you up with three months free of BetterHelp.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I want you to get in front of a counselor. You can do it from your home computer. You don't have to go anywhere and lose an hour of work right now. And I want you to begin to talk about those demons that are inside your chest. Because everyone in your life loves you. The guy who's struggling with loving you is you right now. Fair? They're not wrong.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Absolutely. I want you to be 6'4 and down 100 pounds this time next year. Are you in?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Okay. And not because it's a number. I don't care about the number on a scale. I care because you're worth feeling good when you wake up in the morning. And you're worth not snoring all night. And you're worth laughing and rolling around on the floor with your kids. And I want that last kid of yours to have you walk him down the aisle.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Or if it's your son is the last one, I want you hugging his guts out backstage before he walks down the aisle. This is how family trees change. When one person stares it down, looks in the mirror and says, enough is enough is enough. And the change starts with me. Day one starts today. Hang on the line, brother. We're going to hook you up with some stuff. All right. And we'll walk with you.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
You call us anytime. We love you, man. Go get them.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
storage fees or i could surrender the car and i on the phone i just said merry christmas y'all got yourselves a car and i hung up the phone like the car was i didn't buy bought it for half that back in the day can they just surrender the car what was that again i'm sorry can can often this this impoundment fees like it basically is a storage fee
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Can I distill down what you said? And I want to make sure I heard you right.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
The options are get the family back together, get some peace in your life, clear all of your debts, and have a little bit higher monthly payment on your rent. Or keep the family divided up, keep your husband flying back and forth, because you all have convinced yourself there's only one option. It's in Vegas. There's no other jobs in San Diego. We're going back and forth for a low mortgage payment.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
In my head, this is as close to a no-brainer as I've ever heard. It sounds like if I read between all of the lines, you had a picture of what your life was going to look like in this perfect house, in this perfect neighborhood, with your perfect little girls and your perfect husband and your perfect new business, and you haven't fully let that thing go yet.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I'm saying this, I'm not smiling. So I'm being serious, but it's gonna sound silly. I think you and your husband need to, either write a letter together to the life y'all thought you were going to live and read it to each other and have some sort of ceremony or funeral for what was, or draw a picture and put it in a fireplace. You have to sever ties with this dream, this picture you had.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
You've already had a picture of your three daughters married at Thanksgiving at a table in that house you're in right now, right?
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
they'll exchange the fee for that car, the old beat-up car that he left there.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
I don't think that's what it is. I don't think that's what it is. Tell me I'm wrong. I don't think you want to move back to Vegas.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Okay. Then you need to put that on the table. And your husband has some big fantasy dream about rebuilding what he had in Vegas, and he's still trying to fight. He's the boxer that got knocked out for the last time during COVID, and he can't let it go. So he's the 48-year-old boxer who keeps taking pro fights.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
None of this matters. You don't want to live in Las Vegas again. I don't know what it was about your life back then that you didn't like. Maybe you didn't like how he was in Vegas. You didn't like the heat. You didn't like the dirt. You didn't like the community. Whatever it was, it's all okay. But you have to have the courage in your marriage to say, I don't want to live in Las Vegas.
The Ramsey Show
Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Every time a couple backs themselves into an either or situation, here's your homework assignment. Because here's what happens. You have falsely trapped yourselves. And you're either about to sell a house in a community that you love because your husband won't look for a job in San Diego. Or you're about to move to a place that is going to make you miserable.
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And you're going to become somebody you don't want to be.
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Yeah. Is his salary and his partner's salary rolled into that expense?
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
So if they took all combined, what is that? $600,000, they could have the business paid off in about three years.
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Okay, if they sold it, then there needs to be a – they need to take – apply that sale price to the impound fees that they charged him. Yeah, they made some money, so that would reduce what he would owe. They can't just sell a car. Like you would – your dad would still have the title, wouldn't he?
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
UFC runs gyms in Vegas. Everyone runs gyms in Vegas.
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And I'm not saying it's bad. I mean, start your business, do your thing. I agree with, I mean, I'm all for starting businesses. I love it. I love it. I love it. But now you're on the hook for $1.9 million. Yeah. You buried the lead there.
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Or maybe you say, Hey, I'll move to Vegas for two years while we try to pay this. Every penny is going to pay this, this note off. We're going to sell these gyms and then we're going to decide where we actually want to live. But, yeah, I mean, George, as far as I'm hearing, man, keeping my family together is as high a priority as I can place.
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And it's, you know, God help me, it's more important than I got a good mortgage rate.
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Wow. So how many other kids do you have?
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
Okay, but step one of our plan is taking 100% ownership of the mess and not avoiding anything.
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
So that might be that you call the impound place and we call this a stupid tax around here. We do say that with a smile on our face. We're not calling anybody stupid, but you call them and say, I got a thousand dollars. That's all I'm paying for this thing. My dad's on fixed income. He has nothing. They will do somersaults and backflips that they got anything from you.
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And tell him you already sold my dad's car. We still have the title of it. You took the car, you sold it. So for the price that you got for it, and here's a thousand bucks, this is over. Send me this in writing and I will give you a cashier's check. Period.
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
And you might have to help him out there, but just get it done. And then the condo stuff, don't put your head in the sand on that because those fees are going to pile up on you too and get crazy. You're going to be in the same boat, except he's going to lose his house.
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Hard Decisions Today Bring Freedom Tomorrow
You're going to want to get a day breakdown, a 24-hour breakdown on how they arrived at this $3,000 number. They can't just make it up. And if they're charging you $70 a day or something stupid like that, then you dispute that.
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Affordable Gifts People Will Actually Love
Yeah. It keeps you cool. I wasn't sold on it. I was like, this is kind of cheesy. But it was when it was so hot over Fourth of July weekend and we were doing the whole firework thing. And man, love it. Wow. Fantastic.
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Affordable Gifts People Will Actually Love
Would you then lie and be like, oh my gosh, I'm getting, yeah. Oh, you'd be a good, yes, George. This is a good relationship where that could happen. I feel like you would be like, oh, that's so nice. You didn't have to. I didn't get you anything.
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Affordable Gifts People Will Actually Love
And they'll, like, literally wear it out.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
We used it all while I didn't have a job.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
There's a time in your life and the baby steps for renting, but you don't want to do it forever because when you rent, you're still paying for a mortgage, just somebody else's. Plus rent means instability in your budget because it always goes up, never down. So when you're ready to buy, make sure you work with a mortgage partner you can rely on. Churchill Mortgage.
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Churchill is Ramsey trusted to help you make the move from renting to home ownership wisely. Churchill understands that when you buy a home the Ramsey way, your mortgage payment will be a consistent, manageable part of your monthly budget. Plus, when your home is paid off, that was your largest expense. Now it's extra money in your pocket.
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and an asset towards turning you into a baby steps millionaire. Get started on the American dream of home ownership today at churchillmortgage.com. That's churchillmortgage.com.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
What's going on? Thanks for taking my call. Might be a loaded question, but pretty much, is it appropriate for me to to ask an employee about their personal finances, try and dig into it to understand what to pay them in the situation that I did buy this person's book of business in exchange for them having a job. um, steady income.
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Yes, I've been looking for work, and then I've been looking at maybe starting something, but I don't know if I'm too old.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
So I have a general idea, and it's a lot less than what they're getting paid right now. But I also know that they have a lot of personal debt from their business line that we purchased. I know the person has a friend. Now we're just work colleagues. There's not really too much friendship. But the answer is I do know, but it's kind of a struggle to keep a good workplace and make sure that they –
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are in a sense taken care of also, because I'm weaning them off right now. I'm weaning them off being used to be able to live frivolously.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
No, so I actually acquired it for free. So it's actually, we had a document drafted that pretty much gave us the book of business in exchange for their employment guaranteed for six months. What do they get out of this? So they get a job, essentially. They get a job. He's getting paid off the bottom line. He runs one of our branches. We have two branches.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
It was a big plus for us in terms of going from probably $300,000 to $400,000 for this year to probably a million plus in revenue. So... There's a big benefit on our end. And unfortunately, he ran his business into the ground culturally, financially. So that's where we came in compliance wise. They didn't get the insurances they needed because of.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Start starting a small – like starting my own small business and doing this for other – instead of just doing it for one agency, doing it for – I like that.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
$75,000 to $80,000, based hourly with some bonus based off performance. Great. What were they paying themselves before you bought their business? It's hard to determine. I went into their numbers. They were pretty much paying themselves out of the business, him and his fiancée, anywhere from $15,000 to $20,000 a month or more on big months.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
He was overpaying himself. Right. overpaying themselves taking on debt they didn't needed uh they didn't need um yeah spending out of the business haven't paid taxes in three years so he owes back taxes for those for that business for all through the last three years wow like he's mentioned like some like 20 something thousand but you're telling me 80k is market rate to run a branch in your field
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yes, I'd say yeah. That'd be the higher side, you know, with his experience and his repertoire and being able to handle sales and logistics.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
He doesn't have to. He's a valuable asset to the team, but it's just trying to figure out the balance between being a good guy and making sure he's taken care of. That's why I feel like I need to see something. I know him, like I said, as a friend from prior to business. Long story short, I started helping him. Helped him build his business. We had disagreements.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I was like, hey, I need ownership in this thing. It was kind of like a young start. I'm relatively young. And we went down the road of no. So I left, started my own business in the same field. Now acquired his business line. Sure.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Correct, yeah. Then what's that number?
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Max number that's not charitable, 85 to 90, like not much higher than that. That would be like the best of the best.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Okay. Yeah, the other reason I guess I was justifying it was partially the debt, but then also partially like, well, look, we wouldn't have this business line. But I was telling him, dude, there has to be a balance. You can't just say, oh, well, you wouldn't have this business line if it wasn't for what I created. But it's like, well, you wouldn't have a business at all if we didn't step in.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
And now his employees are getting way better ratings, better performance. Everything's improved. Everything has improved from A to Z.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I'd rather do that, yeah. Exactly. In all honesty, business numbers, I'd rather hire someone else, train them. There you go.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
All right, Dave, you have some strong opinions.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I think so. Okay, because you really prefer credit unions over big banks.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Well, credit unions, for one thing, are non-profit, which means that the members, the customers, own the credit union. So any profits that the credit union makes goes back into customer accounts. pricing. So you get better interest rate on savings, cheaper checking, and so on, that kind of thing.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
But what's more important than that, though, is the fact that the customer is the owner changes the spirit on the credit union. So I find very few credit unions that aren't very customer-centric.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Well, and I think we have found one that is incredible, and that's Fairwinds. They are an incredible credit union that is really out with the heart to help the customer.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
They're the right kind of people with the right kind of values. And they've done a really, really good job with customer service. And the deals that they're offering, the Ramsey tribe is incredible.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yeah, absolutely. And I love it. The things that we teach, they so line up with. And you're right, their customer service is unbelievable. Winston and I just signed up and we got an account. And I'm not kidding. It took less than five minutes. It was so user-friendly. Like the step-by-step approach was unbelievable. And then the next day my phone rings and it says Fairwinds on my phone.
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So I answered it. And talked to someone there and they said, yeah, they give calls to every new customer. And so again, they just really care about your experience. And I so, so appreciate that. Plus anything that you can do at a traditional branch, you can do with them at fairwinds.org or on their app. And you'll have free access to over 33,000 ATMs.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Three months ago. So I worked for this company for 10 years now, but two years, a year and a half ago, it was sold. The person that has it now stopped talking to me about three months ago. Does it unshunned? I can feel it in the air. Meetings I used to be included in. to do the thing I'm doing, but you never get the feeling that I'm not valued. Yeah.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Hey, you guys know how much I hate banks in general. And so for me to do this is a big deal. Talk to our friends at Fairwinds and check out the combined checking and savings bundle that they created just for the Ramsey tribe. You guys, it's incredible.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yeah, you guys, it's so easy to join Fairwinds no matter where you live. So go to fairwinds.org slash Ramsey.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Fairwinds is federally insured by NCUA.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I'm good. So my question is, I paid off my... Only debt I had, which was my car payment, and I have about $600 extra, and I've been putting my money paycheck to paycheck into different TFSA accounts. I have three TFSA accounts, and I got two RSP accounts.
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running right now but i want to put my money into something that will give me more money back when i retire or like when i go buy a house and i don't know where to start to put my money into that do you have any savings i have like 12 000 that's it okay is that considered your emergency fund is that enough for three to six months of expenses So the three, six months, I have about $5,000.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yeah, it's just in my RRSP. Those ones.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yeah. I can't take money out of my RSPO so I get taxed.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I would like to get a house down payment in within like 10 years by the time I hit 40.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Oh, thank you. But also, do I continue even putting money into my RRSP account? Because I heard someone say, you shouldn't. You should just keep your money into a TFSA account. It would give you more...
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
You guys, one of the best gifts that you can leave your family after you're gone isn't stuff. It's peace. When something happens, your loved ones don't want to be digging through drawers or guessing passwords to access your important information. That is why I love Knockbox. That's N-O-K as in next of kin box.
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Knockbox is a super practical physical system that helps you organize all your important documents like accounts, passwords, assets, medical records, even your will in one safe place. And your knockbox is divided into user-friendly categories to help you get organized so you can give your family clarity, not clutter, when they need it most. Go to knockbox.com slash Ramsey and check it out.
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Okay, guys, I got big news. Aldi is now the official grocery sponsor of The Ramsey Show. Yeah, Ramsey is teaming up with Aldi, the grocery store that cares as much about saving money as I do. Get this, Aldi branded products save you up to 63% over similar name brand products at other stores.
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Hey, how's it going, guys? Hey. Quick question for you here. So I'm planning on moving in with my longtime girlfriend by the end of the year probably. Buy her dinner first. Yeah, I've bought her plenty. So she's actually been in school for the past couple of years and will come out earning – she's in graduate school. She's going to come out earning a pretty good chunk, maybe close to $130 to $150.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
And I'm just looking for some help on how to budget that because she's going to be the higher income earner, but she'll also have a lot more student loans. So just looking to see how you guys would recommend we balance that household budget. Well, that sounds like you guys are combining finances. That is the plan, yep, or at least in some way contribute to the household, the goals together.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I have none. And I have a pretty good savings investment accounts built up. We're both really young. So I'm in a very good place. She just has the student loans as well.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
No, we're going to rent an apartment together.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yes. I'm not planning on paying off her loans, but I'm wondering how much she would expect. I guess that would be a conversation for her, but how much she should contribute to the household versus living off of one income, having her use her income to pay off the debt primarily.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
So probably at most, probably getting up to around $200,000. Yeah. How long have you guys been dating? We've been dating about three years. And you've never lived together? Well, she's been in school for the majority of that time, and we've actually been doing long distance for about two years of it.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
But any time she comes home, we are those staying together, so we sort of have a history of living together for a few months at a time, and it goes really well. Of course, we have those long-term plans together. How old are you, Jake?
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yeah, that's on the agenda for both of us.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Give me a date. Five years down the road engagement, probably. Why five years? Hold on, another five years? Yeah. Probably something like that. Why? Maybe at least three at a minimum. What's up with the minimum? I'm calling in for financial advice, guys.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
True. Good point. Yeah, I mean, we're just sort of feeling it out. We're not in any rush right now. I want to enjoy time together while we're young, and we know the vision we have, so we're not in a rush to get married. We just want to enjoy our time together.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
That's sort of what I'm getting at is because we are both on the same page financially. I'm a very financially conscious person. She knows my attention and dedication to just building a future for myself and ourselves there. So she wants this paid off. She wants to contribute towards the household. So I guess a big question of what I'm asking is,
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With this future we're both envisioning for ourselves together, marriage aside, we'll table that for the time being. But how much do you think? Is it, at this point, 50-50 split? Or would those plans to marry down the road, should it be maybe I do first?
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Let's go to Zachary in Los Angeles, California.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
So I don't have an IRA or any actual plan, so let me just start by saying that, and that keeps me up at night. I just didn't do what I needed to do. I have $60,000 in savings. I have $2,000 in credit card debt. I own one home outright. Whenever I look at that on one of the sites, it goes anywhere from $700,000 to $800,000. And then I have a second home with a current mortgage on that.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Hey, thank you guys so much for taking my call. The issue that I'm having, it's actually more of a moral dilemma, and I'm looking for some guidance from you guys.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I appreciate it. So about a year and a half ago, I got quote unquote recruited into the insurance industry. As I'm sure you can guess, it's the whole life insurance industry. And I graduated from college in 2023 and just graduated from grad school about a couple weeks ago. I'm a full-time college basketball player, as well as working part-time. I got married in August, and so...
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My moral dilemma is a little bit unique because this industry has done a lot for me financially, but the more that I've listened to you guys and the more that I've just grown to learn the financial industry as a whole, the more I am struggling to sell a product that I don't necessarily believe in. Did you ever believe in it? What caused the turn?
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I got a cold DM on Instagram about a guy that played sports in college and does sales and stuff. I was like, oh, that should work for my situation, and my managers allowed me to do it part-time, and I really got to kill it when I was working full-time, and I didn't have a great understanding of the product at all.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I just knew it was sales, and it became delucrative, and so it was one of those things that was difficult to step away from, and especially getting married, I'm not sure.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I just listen. I mean, listening to you guys, if I'm being completely honest, like I understand, like if you, I was pretty naive. Like when I started, I just knew it was sales. I knew it was insurance. You're getting pulled by all these people that it's helping people. Um, you know, it's, it's, it's a product, it's cash value, it's building, it's an investment.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
So you're learning from people that don't know. And then you learn a different side and you do research. And so that's where it was really kind of more difficult for me to, you know, And the kicker is I'm actually leaving in three months to go to Europe with my wife to go play professional basketball. Nice.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
And that's that's really like the quote unquote dilemma is like, is it something that I should? Because the earnings potential through the summer is so high and it's just so, like, conflicted with, like, do I provide for my wife and I versus what do we do?
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It's, it's becoming more difficult too. And I, like I said, I want to just preface it by saying I'm, I'm super blessed with an incredible wife and incredible faith and incredible family. So it's like, I, I am so blessed in my life and I never take that for granted financially, uh, relationally. And so, um,
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I just like the work that I've been doing, especially the last month since I've been done with school and basketball and trying to get back into it full time has been much more difficult this year than it was last year. Right. And why is it difficult? Because of that little voice in your head.
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I owe $279,000 on that house. Is it being rented? Yes, my son currently lives in it, and he rents it. He's good about that. I want to try to keep it.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yeah, most likely the middle to end of August. And that's also kind of the other part of the question is, like, what does it... I don't know if there's advice or what does it look like because it doesn't really feel like to me it makes a lot of sense to make a change, a career change.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I mean, need is... I don't need, I guess, quote-unquote, need any money in terms of, like, we have... We're pretty... We've set up pretty well. I mean, we have about... The thing for me is just... Yeah. We don't need anything.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Not a lot in the first year. It's usually...
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yeah, I played at Point Loma, Nazarene, and San Diego, as well as Seattle Pacific and Seattle.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
So the total expenses to manage that home is about $4,000. The mortgage, utilities, all of those kind of things to live in there, and he pays that. I don't make anything, but I don't pay anything.
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When you go through a job loss or job change and lose your employer-sponsored health insurance, there's no better time to try Christian Healthcare Ministries. That's right. There's another option besides COBRA to take care of your family during that time. Because if you didn't know, the cost of COBRA has gone up a lot in the past few years.
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And CHM is an affordable, biblically-based alternative to health insurance. So do your own research. The CHM is a great option that's potentially a third of the price of Cobra. It's a health cost sharing ministry that's helped hundreds of thousands of families like yours take care of over $11 billion in medical bills since 1981.
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And the support you get from CHM goes beyond helping you pay for medical bills. Members become part of a family that prays for them when they have a medical event. Try getting that with Cobra. So if you're going through a job loss, life change, or just want to explore other options to save on health care... CHM might be perfect for you. CHM programs start as low as $98 a month.
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So find out more at chministries.org slash budget at chministries.org slash budget.
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Listen, guys, I've heard just about every excuse for why folks think they can't get ahead with money. So let's go ahead and settle this right now. You get the final say on what happens with your money. That's why you have to start telling your money where to go so you can stop wondering where it went. So if you're going to start winning with money, you have to get on a budget.
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The easiest way to get started and stick to it is with the EveryDollar Budget app. It'll help you make a plan for every single dollar coming in and every single dollar going out every single month. And guess what? It's free, so no excuses. Download EveryDollar in the App Store or Google Play today.
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Hi. My question is if you guys would think that it would be feasible for me to be a stay-at-home mom. Um, so I've kind of ran the numbers and I've made a budget for my husband. Um, and it's kind of looked everything over and it's taken him a while to finally like agree to it and be comfortable with it.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Um, but my thought was if I could get the Ramsey network to quote unquote approve it, then maybe we could make it happen.
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Yep. It's tight, but it's very, very doable. So the reason why I'm still employed is so that I can get my pension. So I'm almost five years vested with the state. And then after that, that's whenever we're looking for me to be able to stay home. So we have a two-year-old and an eight-month-old, both 20 months apart. And so line by line, he makes about $1,200 a week.
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And so it would be tight, but we could do it.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
So everything's paid off besides the house. We just have $50,000 left on the house.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
We do. We have about $20,000 in savings.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yep. Yep. So we cash bought a vehicle in March. Um, we traded my old Equinox in for a minivan. So I'm a minivan mom. Um, and so we were able to pay cash for that, which is pretty awesome feeling. Um, and then everything else is paid for. So we have no debt, no nothing. Um, and then he has side job Saturdays and I have side job Saturdays.
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And so I'm a part-time photographer and so he's a blue collar man. So he goes and welds and what does he make?
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Probably right around 70,000, I think.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I, not his. Mine was, I do photography, and so I charge $300 a session, and I just budget to do two sessions a month. That's very minimum for me.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
So I would be vested for retirement at the end of July, and so then probably August.
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But we wanted to stay that vested so I could get the pension when I retire with the state. But then also I put in extra retirement. So I put in about 15% of my income once I started here. And so I have roughly about $30,000 in retirement just with the state.
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And I love what I do. So I work in recruitment for a college. And I love what I do to recruit these students for technical education. It's just my babies are calling me home.
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Right around $15,000 to $1,900, I think.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yeah. So he just turned 31 this week, and I'm 29. And we have him putting $500 a month into a Roth IRA already.
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Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I am with my current salary. With him, we're at $500 a month for him putting into a Roth IRA.
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All right, let's cut to the chase. It's easy to get discouraged about crazy house prices and interest rates. But when you have the right real estate agent to help you buy and sell the right way, you'll have confidence to make smart decisions. Ramsey Trusted Agents aren't just experts who guide you through buying or selling.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
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The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Hi, Ken. Hi, George. Thank you so much for taking my call.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I'm a long-time listener and follower of Baby Steps.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
My wife and I made it to Baby Steps 7 about five years ago. Hey-o.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yeah, thank you. We've got a problem. I wanted to run something by you, get some advice, and see what you think.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
So one of the things we're doing well that got us there is investing in our company 401k plans.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
and i work for a small business very small family-owned company at the llc and have been in there 401k about 14 years have amassed about 315 000 at its height in march of this year we know what happened to the market in april so it went down about 250. and around that time the company wants to switch providers So we get a blackout notice. Everything seems kosher.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
However, during that switch, I found out that we were fully divested out of the market for seven days, May 7th to May 14th. And if you've been watching the market, that was a rally period. So losses were realized. I lost about 237 shares valued at $18,000 out of that retirement account. And I've got about 30 more years projected to my retirement date.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
So the question, I guess, is have you ever heard of that? I guess it's standard, I'm told, for retirement. an old 401k provider to liquidate to cash and then spend some days to move out of the market and then rebuy with a new company.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I owe $279,000 on it, and when I look at that, it's anywhere from $400,000 to $500,000. I bought it when I was older. Amazing.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Sure. Yeah, I appreciate that. We did talk to the employer. In fact, this happened in 2017 as well, but it was only 15 shares and about $800. Much smaller scale. Yeah. I warned the employer and asked the new advisor, hey, I've got scars from last time and the stakes are higher. Can this be avoided? And it wasn't avoided. When I followed up, the response was, sorry, that can happen.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
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The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Thank you so much for both of you taking my call, and I'm sorry if I sound a little nervous. I'm
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
One of the first things I discovered working in the financial world is how absolutely devastating it is when the breadwinner of a family dies. and there's too little life insurance, or none at all. Grieving families are suddenly left behind scrambling to pay bills and trying to make ends meet.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I also discovered that there are a lot of rip-offs in the life insurance world, like that whole life crap posing as an investment opportunity. What you need is level-term life insurance, usually 10 to 12 times your income, which is the smartest, most affordable way to protect your family. The key is finding an independent broker who represents a ton of companies We'll be right back.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
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The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
fired from my job and i don't know um if i'm going to be able to find work and so i'm trying to figure out what my next steps could be what do you do right now i do i work for a home care agency and i do billing payroll scheduling and i hire okay i've been doing that for two years jack of all trades yeah but but but very administratively gifted i'm gathering
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Hey, thanks for taking my call. I just have so many different lines of debt, lines of credit, and I don't know exactly when each payment's coming out or how much is coming out. I'm just wondering how I kind of get that under control.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Well, it's really only been a big issue since I bought a house.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
It's a brand-new house, so no repairs or renovations, but those door-to-door guys are pretty good.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Was this $4,000 vacuum? We got it for $1,500.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Yeah, who's we? Me and my wife got married in January. We bought the house in December.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
We are very much together on feeling the brunt of it. We both work together a lot on getting us paid. We don't right now have an account together. which we need to do. Uh, that's something we've talked about is getting a bank account together. A hundred percent.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Uh, I'm not sure I completely understand. I don't think I have.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
No, no student loans, and we both have a paid-off car.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Um... That's kind of spotty right now. I just got a new job. I'm a waiter, so it goes up and down. But we've both made consistently anywhere from $60,000 to $70,000 each the past three years.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
You said a new job. More like $50,000 this year.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
Well, the company I worked for transferred me to a struggling location, and then I quit that job to become a door-to-door salesman, and that just worked out. What are you selling? Well, I don't do that anymore.
The Ramsey Show
Sacrifice Now To Secure Your Financial Future
I was selling internet. Yeah, I was selling internet.
The Ramsey Show
Debt Isn't The Problem - Your Mindset Is
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
The Ramsey Show
You Can’t Win with Money if You Keep Borrowing It
When you go through a job loss or job change and lose your employer-sponsored health insurance, there's no better time to try Christian Healthcare Ministries. That's right. There's another option besides COBRA to take care of your family during that time. Because if you didn't know, the cost of COBRA has gone up a lot in the past few years.
The Ramsey Show
You Can’t Win with Money if You Keep Borrowing It
And CHM is an affordable, biblically-based alternative to health insurance. So do your own research. The CHM is a great option that's potentially a third of the price of Cobra. It's a health cost-sharing ministry that's helped hundreds of thousands of families like yours take care of over $11 billion in medical bills since 1981.
The Ramsey Show
You Can’t Win with Money if You Keep Borrowing It
And the support you get from CHM goes beyond helping you pay for medical bills. Members become part of a family that prays for them when they have a medical event. Try getting that with Cobra. So if you're going through a job loss, life change, or just want to explore other options to save on healthcare, CHM might be perfect for you. CHM programs start as low as $98 a month.
The Ramsey Show
You Can’t Win with Money if You Keep Borrowing It
So find out more at chministries.org slash budget at chministries.org slash budget.
The Ramsey Show
You Can’t Win with Money if You Keep Borrowing It
There's a time in your life and the baby steps for renting, but you don't want to do it forever because when you rent, you're still paying for a mortgage, just somebody else's. Plus rent means instability in your budget because it always goes up, never down. So when you're ready to buy, make sure you work with a mortgage partner you can rely on. Churchill Mortgage.
The Ramsey Show
You Can’t Win with Money if You Keep Borrowing It
Churchill is Ramsey trusted to help you make the move from renting to home ownership wisely. Churchill understands that when you buy a home the Ramsey way, your mortgage payment will be a consistent, manageable part of your monthly budget. Plus, when your home is paid off, that was your largest expense. Now it's extra money in your pocket.
The Ramsey Show
You Can’t Win with Money if You Keep Borrowing It
and an asset towards turning you into a Baby Steps millionaire. Get started on the American dream of home ownership today at churchillmortgage.com. That's churchillmortgage.com.
The Ramsey Show
You Can’t Win with Money if You Keep Borrowing It
Yes, I have, George. Sketchy and never trust them.
The Ramsey Show
You Can’t Win with Money if You Keep Borrowing It
Yeah, they do. Delete.me actually goes in and removes your information from data broker websites, and it is an incredible service that everyone needs.
The Ramsey Show
You Can’t Win with Money if You Keep Borrowing It
That's right. And then once they remove your information, then they're going to send you a detailed report telling you where they found your information, when they removed it, how many hours they've saved you. I mean, it is incredible. So detailed and it's beautiful.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
I am doing pretty good today. Are you able to hear me pretty well?
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
So I am wanting a great startup advice on how to start paying off my student loans. I am 25 years old, and I am on the end of my road to become a licensed therapist. And during between the ages of 21 to 23, there was a lot of struggles, unfortunately, to where to the point I was possibly stealing food or risk of homelessness.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
And when I have found out about refund checks, I was accepting multiple loans just to live off of those refund checks from ranging of $4,000 to about $7,000 to And now being 25, I have about $135,000 in student debt. I'm not out of college or graduate school yet, but I'm wanting to go ahead and start tackling this.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
I absolutely agree. That is, That is one thought I was having because, unfortunately, in the state of Tennessee, a typical counselor's salary is only about $50,000 to $60,000 a year.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
I will be done with my classes by May, and then I'm starting my internship May 26th to November 2nd.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
No, this is an unpaid internship, but I already have a full-time job at another treatment center. When does that start? How much does it pay? Is that starting in November? No, so I'm currently working a full-time job right now, but my unpaid internship starts May 26th. Okay.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
I make roughly about... $42,000 a year.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
Roughly about just the same. Because right now for mental health technicians, that's just what I work as. It's going to be about $22 an hour.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
Okay, so for a therapist, it would really depend ultimately on the agency to where hopefully I can try to make about $55,000 to $60,000. That's my dream to start off with.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
I have not paid all the way through yet.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
I believe, oh gosh, it's still, you're talking about my student loans itself?
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
No, I do not have... Well, the only credit card I do have is care credit just for my dog to take him to his yearly debt appointments.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
That is about... I have the exact number right here. I have about $10,000 left on that.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
She didn't sign anything, did she? No.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
And the good thing is that I also got, I don't really know how to quite use it. I did get a life coach and spiritual coach certification to maybe open up another side business as well.