Unnamed Character 10
👤 PersonPodcast Appearances
I could go for some cobbler right now. I'm running on empty.
I could go for some cobbler right now. I'm running on empty.
I have to say, at this point, we could've just left.
I have to say, at this point, we could've just left.
That's what I'm saying, we're right back at square one. We could've gotten into none of the high drinks we got on sale. We could've skipped this whole clearing. We've undone days of storytelling.
That's what I'm saying, we're right back at square one. We could've gotten into none of the high drinks we got on sale. We could've skipped this whole clearing. We've undone days of storytelling.
We were going to rob the place, and then we got the books, and then we upper decked the desk, and then we did the clever maneuvering around faking our deaths, and all to get your dad out of gambling debt, and now he thinks you're dead!
We were going to rob the place, and then we got the books, and then we upper decked the desk, and then we did the clever maneuvering around faking our deaths, and all to get your dad out of gambling debt, and now he thinks you're dead!
Wow. So they'll just think it's a woodland bird. Yeah, this plan is foolproof.
Wow. So they'll just think it's a woodland bird. Yeah, this plan is foolproof.
Why does it smell so heavily of mac and cheese?
Why does it smell so heavily of mac and cheese?
And to be honest with you, after the events of the morning, I'm not exactly sure where the heck we stand in this town. I don't think there's anything you could add to the situation that would clarify this slide.
And to be honest with you, after the events of the morning, I'm not exactly sure where the heck we stand in this town. I don't think there's anything you could add to the situation that would clarify this slide.
It's not the first time you've suggested stabbing yourselves to solve a problem you've been faced with. It's a recurring theme.
It's not the first time you've suggested stabbing yourselves to solve a problem you've been faced with. It's a recurring theme.
Oh, I say, I say, I think I laid a dozen eggs in there. Possibly a baker's dozen. Wait, you can do that? You can lay eggs? No, you can do that. Oh, I see.
Oh, I say, I say, I think I laid a dozen eggs in there. Possibly a baker's dozen. Wait, you can do that? You can lay eggs? No, you can do that. Oh, I see.
And these creatures live out here in the woods? Yes.
And these creatures live out here in the woods? Yes.
I've never had to travel through the woods before.
I've never had to travel through the woods before.
What kind of message are they trying to send you?
What kind of message are they trying to send you?
Well, right in Ladue's desk.
Well, right in Ladue's desk.
I knew I liked you. I mean, you should have heard him yelling for Jean-Luc. I wish I could have been that. I would have chipped in a little. Well, I appreciate that. It was great. Oh, I got to change my disguise. I take off my glasses. Back to... Whoa! Back to Jean-Claude.
I knew I liked you. I mean, you should have heard him yelling for Jean-Luc. I wish I could have been that. I would have chipped in a little. Well, I appreciate that. It was great. Oh, I got to change my disguise. I take off my glasses. Back to... Whoa! Back to Jean-Claude.
Are your feet the actual equivalent size of a foot?
Are your feet the actual equivalent size of a foot?
Those are gigantic pieces. Such a small, such a small little problem.
Those are gigantic pieces. Such a small, such a small little problem.
Aren't you so nice? I mean, your balance of, I mean, it's impressive. Your central gravity's got to be.
Aren't you so nice? I mean, your balance of, I mean, it's impressive. Your central gravity's got to be.
Nobody can push you up, is all I'm saying. That's true, that's true. Laying on the ground like a tree.
Nobody can push you up, is all I'm saying. That's true, that's true. Laying on the ground like a tree.
He's still warming up, he's still warming up.
He's still warming up, he's still warming up.
Better all come back to you.
Better all come back to you.
He doesn't even know that we've done set him up, so I think... Should we fake our own deaths?
He doesn't even know that we've done set him up, so I think... Should we fake our own deaths?
I rolled a 16, and I think it's a plus two, so 18.
I rolled a 16, and I think it's a plus two, so 18.
A woodsman. A woodsman.
A woodsman. A woodsman.
You've been through these parts of the forest before.
You've been through these parts of the forest before.
Well, that's good to know. I don't scare easy, but I have to admit to a certain amount of unsettlement with these here woods here.
Well, that's good to know. I don't scare easy, but I have to admit to a certain amount of unsettlement with these here woods here.
Oh, you told me the story of the bare hand trying to snap the neck. That's how we met.
Oh, you told me the story of the bare hand trying to snap the neck. That's how we met.
Well, yeah, I suppose.
Well, yeah, I suppose.
You have got to be the worst bag maker I've ever met.
You have got to be the worst bag maker I've ever met.
Don't worry. I'm just making an observation. As your son tells it, you're making dysentery cheese.
Don't worry. I'm just making an observation. As your son tells it, you're making dysentery cheese.
I'll untie some theories. But somebody remind me, are we actually in trouble for anything?
I'll untie some theories. But somebody remind me, are we actually in trouble for anything?
Or if you were trying to frame your brother. To be killed.
Or if you were trying to frame your brother. To be killed.
Well, and in the dead of night, I can't see five feet past my face.
Well, and in the dead of night, I can't see five feet past my face.
Well, exactly right, but presumably we have several days to make good on the assassination. We could just walk out of here without being stopped and say we're doing reconnaissance.
Well, exactly right, but presumably we have several days to make good on the assassination. We could just walk out of here without being stopped and say we're doing reconnaissance.
If you look on the bright side, I thought he was gonna offer the play squirrels. I was a little worried about that.
If you look on the bright side, I thought he was gonna offer the play squirrels. I was a little worried about that.
And after that, it's the newspaper.
And after that, it's the newspaper.
I suppose I'll pass, too. Oh, come on. Don't be a cow. I'm not going out to the bathroom by myself. Are you a big chicken? You're darn right. Have you seen me? Have you seen this barrel chest?
I suppose I'll pass, too. Oh, come on. Don't be a cow. I'm not going out to the bathroom by myself. Are you a big chicken? You're darn right. Have you seen me? Have you seen this barrel chest?
That's quite all right. I couldn't believe you made mac and cheese like that.
That's quite all right. I couldn't believe you made mac and cheese like that.
I still don't know what you're talking about. You mean to say all the way from town there's a trail of Beauregard's macaroni and dysentery cheese and all the way to our campsite?
I still don't know what you're talking about. You mean to say all the way from town there's a trail of Beauregard's macaroni and dysentery cheese and all the way to our campsite?
Listen, after all that talk about the creature that stalks the woods and steals your teeth, I don't want to be hunted by a macaroni trail teeth-stealing monster. The macaroni in the fire's gonna lead them right to us. Well, we should put the fire out.
Listen, after all that talk about the creature that stalks the woods and steals your teeth, I don't want to be hunted by a macaroni trail teeth-stealing monster. The macaroni in the fire's gonna lead them right to us. Well, we should put the fire out.
It is a brisk evening. This is like a little chilly.
It is a brisk evening. This is like a little chilly.
I bet you he's suggesting we set the fire. No more votes. We don't have any paper or quill, we got no ink.
I bet you he's suggesting we set the fire. No more votes. We don't have any paper or quill, we got no ink.
Well, I voted for putting the fire out. Oh, you didn't vote?
Well, I voted for putting the fire out. Oh, you didn't vote?
What do you want to do? Bromley, you abstained.
What do you want to do? Bromley, you abstained.
He's smiling so big already.
He's smiling so big already.
Well, why don't you just say Stash and Pits? Okay, we were... Oh, wait, wait, what about the servants of night here?
Well, why don't you just say Stash and Pits? Okay, we were... Oh, wait, wait, what about the servants of night here?
That's good, but... Are you saying that you used the potential kidnapping by monsters of one of your childhood friends to teach your son a lesson about climbing ladders? As a father, wouldn't you? Well, I think I teach him the lesson about not going into the woods.
That's good, but... Are you saying that you used the potential kidnapping by monsters of one of your childhood friends to teach your son a lesson about climbing ladders? As a father, wouldn't you? Well, I think I teach him the lesson about not going into the woods.
Suppose it's something you need to know about her.
Suppose it's something you need to know about her.
You all right? Is it by chance the mac and cheese is coming back?
You all right? Is it by chance the mac and cheese is coming back?
I think we've all been there.
I think we've all been there.
It is going to be just absolutely all wild if we did all this, all the... All the demon, all the flim flamming, all the misdirection. The life risking. All the faking our deaths. That's what I'm trying to say. To save your death. For nothing. Only for him to die of shit in the woods. With a hole not big enough to kick his dick.
It is going to be just absolutely all wild if we did all this, all the... All the demon, all the flim flamming, all the misdirection. The life risking. All the faking our deaths. That's what I'm trying to say. To save your death. For nothing. Only for him to die of shit in the woods. With a hole not big enough to kick his dick.
Sounds like a bunch of gravel in a metal bucket. We might as well relight the fire. We gotta hear you from before they see us.
Sounds like a bunch of gravel in a metal bucket. We might as well relight the fire. We gotta hear you from before they see us.
Should we check on him at all?
Should we check on him at all?
We're just Final Destination, this guy. He's just having a horrible time.
We're just Final Destination, this guy. He's just having a horrible time.
What the fuck was his name? Pendleton Whismith. Pendleton Whismith. The beloved town cobbler.
What the fuck was his name? Pendleton Whismith. Pendleton Whismith. The beloved town cobbler.
P.S. Enjoy my last surprise.
P.S. Enjoy my last surprise.