Zaina
Appearances
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
100%.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
I'm doing pretty okay.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
I just want to say thank God for my therapist because if it wasn't for her, I don't know how I would be as sane as I am today. But the overall experience was just like really crazy because I went all in. I... Was ready to, you know, do the experiment with JR and see where we could go. But I was also very adamant about what I needed. And I was just, you know, met with a lot of lies from all.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Before we did the experiment, first and foremost, I was a little hesitant because I was just nervous about it. It's like, all right, we're putting ourselves out there. And he reassured me that our relationship had a strong enough foundation to withstand the experiment. And he didn't want to go through any boundaries and things like that. But I left that with confidence.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
we would still have mutual respect. Like if you love me as deeply as you say you love me, you can go through this experiment and still respect me bare minimum. So the JR that you guys see during dating week, dating Sandy, I've never met him. My friends and family watching this who have actually spent time with him, jaw to the ground.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
We're like, who is this person that he decided to be for the sake of this experiment? The way he was with Sandy was honestly kind of the way he was with me in our honeymoon phase, minus the overly sexualization. That is crazy. crazy.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
And I've never heard any of those things come out of his mouth before, but like the flattery, the lovey dovey physical touch, you're the, you're the best one dressed here. I've never been as vulnerable as anyone else before. Like he said all of those same things to me. So the fact that he was doing all of that,
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
while it was being filmed in 4k and that came clean to me is like absolutely ridiculous like i found out about everything watching it back with y'all that's crazy so he never came clean about i mean i think we just counted i think we as a viewer saw at least four kisses
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Never. Or even the way he was acting, like what he was saying, like none of that. Like I found out about the kiss at the changeover. Right. I tried my best to hold my composure. But when I tell you, I was like steaming because it's after girls night with Sandy. I'm like, what the heck? We're all like, what's going on? He never said anything about it. And he also said,
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
downplayed it he said he wasn't attracted to sandy he said it was just a peck she initiated it it was just two so in my head i'm thinking like okay like she just leaned in for a kiss that's it like i'm not seeing what all the other viewers are watching to see the drastic difference between like their connection and then like ours and you're probably thinking there's not there's no way he's gonna lie about this because it's all on camera anyways he's not that stupid okay at that in 4k yeah
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Obviously, they want us to keep everything very separate. I told production, I'm like, I need to have a conversation with Sandy or I'm going to have words with her off screen. So you either capture it or you don't. So we did film a scene that wasn't shown where she did kind of explain her POV. Like she swears that they never did anything past the kiss.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
And she was trying to reassure me girl to girl that there wasn't anything there. They weren't leaving together. She's trying to make him a better person for me. All of the above.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
I was like to then hear that back then and then see it in 4K once again, because everything's captured in 4K. It's just been a lot to process and just really try to. JR is a pathological liar. I'll just say that.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Like so calm.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
I didn't see what was right in front of me. And that's the sad part. Like, obviously now I see a lot of things, but back then I was just being my normal self. I'm a giver. Everyone's talking about, why are you getting him gifts? Like, that's just my love language. And that's just how I love on like the people around me. So yeah, It's all just been so interesting to watch it all play back.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Yeah. So I don't know a lot of details, but I do know that there was a lot of contact during like obviously Nick was by himself and no one needed to be in that experiment like by themselves. Like I'm sure he was going stir crazy and he actually found out about the kiss like early on. I was left in the dark. So I understood why he was just kind of spiraling, especially being by himself.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
But I remember Sandy telling me that like prior to the show, like she did feel a lot of neglect in their relationship. So it's like, how do you go from neglect to now? Like, love bombing me and like doing all these things where it's like, you brought me here.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
So that's kind of where, from my perspective, where things landed with them, where she was just really confused by how he was acting or his reaction to what was going on.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Absolutely. It's diabolical. Like I did nothing to JR to ever get that reaction. Like I just, to this day, I do not understand. I do not comprehend how he could do that
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
to me there are rumors going around around that we're we were in a fake relationship obviously having some issues but then for him to turn around and just like disrespect me with no regard it's just like crazy to wrap my brain around how did you guys end up on the show
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
I've always said an ultimatum goes two ways. Someone has to issue it and the other person has to accept it in order to do a show like this. Two willing participants have to be there. So with JR and I, ironically, there was like an ad that popped up that they were doing like the casting for our area. And I brought it up to him as a joke. And he was like, oh, we should apply. And at the time.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Um, obviously when anyone's issued an ultimatum or that's on the table, there's a disconnect in the relationship period. And I had felt a drift in there, our relationship in the months leading up to the experiment. So I thought JR is like enthusiasm to wanting to do the show.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
was him like actually prioritizing like our relationship I'm like finally like there was discrepancies on social media and posting and he wanted to like not have me on his page and stuff so I was like wow to go from that to now doing a global streamer show like now you're trying to show the world that we're in this relationship and we can actually work on it so I
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
I would say the first two years were very like honeymoon phase and very like all in. I think when he made a transition from corporate to doing fitness full time and wanted to like build his brand as like a fitness influencer. Yeah.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
is when things started going downhill and this was all leading up to the experiment so he took me to jamaica for my birthday in march of last year and then i had him all over my page like i can go to my archives photos in instagram and show you guys like where he was on my page when we got back from that trip he asked me to stop commenting on
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
his post because people would click on my page and then see him and he wanted to be perceived as single in order to build his brand and that was like a huge argument because I'm like I understand building a brand and having things separate you had a candle line don't post a girl like it makes sense but your dms better not be like you're single so for me like that was like where the disconnect started because I was like well what are your intentions like
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
with wanting to be perceived as single. And that's when I think that's where he calls me petty, like petty Zay. I ended up like archiving all of our photos because I'm like, it's not a two-way, it's a two-way street. Like I'm not about to have you on my page and you're now asking me not to comment as your girlfriend.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
So that was honestly like, that was when I feel like the pivotal point when things started going downhill, which was like six months-ish into doing the ultimatum. So when people are like, oh, it looks like a disconnect, like, yeah, there was a lot of like... disconnect in our relationship.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
And I was like, let's do this and like, figure out like, let's get to the bottom of everything and talk it through.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
So crazy. Like this is all in 4K. Like what is wrong with you? And the fact that he never like came clean about anything. Because if you value someone and you know that you want to still be with them or if there's a proposal on the line, wouldn't you come clean?
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
what does your gut tell you we really big on believing our guts what like what does your gut tell you that they hooked up or your life's on the line and you have to give an answer of what those two did what what's your what's your answer oh it's so hard because i'm just like i i just don't know i'm like only god knows y'all have a lie detector in there because like that's the only way that we'll be able to that's a really good idea more people on the air like i want to know that
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Fundamentally.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
There was probably like nervous chuckle, like what the fuck's going on? But that was a very serious conversation. Like even for me to say in the scene, so... Me turning down your two date ideas is a form of rejection. And for him to respond, there's no like edits there. And I definitely felt like an energy shift with that. I think Scotty overall, like he's not a bad person. I think he means well.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
I think he loves hard. I think he wants to love Scotty. and build a family based on, you know, just based on what his mom and his dad had. So I do think there is a lack of self-awareness that comes with Scotty where he doesn't necessarily see like what he's doing or how, you know, he gets triggered in arguments and then like goes crazy and starts throwing like my age at me.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Like, bro, we're only two years apart.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
And it was like, bro, you're 30. Our child marriage was actually really great in the beginning. He was all in. We were definitely trying to challenge each other with emotional vulnerability. And I could tell he wanted to put his best foot forward. But then everything happened with what I call the crash and burn situation. which ended up making me leave.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
I feel like that was maybe like three or four days before. Actually, no, I think it was like two days because I went to a hotel and I slept there and they were like, oh, you can come back and have a conversation with him and then go to the changeover together. So I think it was like they don't really show that.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
So when I left was like three or four days of that same energy left. And anyone who knows me, like my friends and family know I'm a very patient person. So for me to have to like exit stage left, that means I did not like I couldn't deal with it anymore.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Mind you, this is probably three or four days in of him doing the same thing. And first and foremost, like the whole conversation around me talking to JR was so irrelevant to why JR had negative opinions about him. Like the moment I walked in from girls night, I knew it wasn't like a safe place to have a productive conversation.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
He already had a narrative in his head of what happened and he wanted to put that blame on me. So I already clocked what he was doing. I'm like, you're trying to get me to say I would talk to JR so that it can make sense in your brain as to why JR came at you crazy. And it's a known fact that like everyone was talking, communicating with their original partners.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Like literally a few days before he asked me, Scotty asked me to reach out to JR to see if he wanted to use his barber who flew in from LA. So it's like, you know that there's been conversation, but yet you're trying to put me in a position where It's making it seem like I'm the reason why JR hates you. That's why I refuse to give into it. Because it's like, you know what it is.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
So now you're just badgering me by saying, well, you go to the bathroom with your phone. You must be talking to JR. Actually, I have a life. Actually, I was also working remotely.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Let's just go like, why did you get out on me? I had a great night. Yeah. They told me nothing was going on between us. Yeah.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
And at that time, the whole hall pass thing, I was standing up for J.R. I was like, this is not in his character. He would never like everyone is seeing it from, you know, watching it as a show. But me in that moment, I was like, there is no way like J.R. here for a hall pass like never. So it was just all so ridiculous.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Um, yeah. Like, it's no question. If I was a viewer, I would be like, dang, you just wanted to, like... Get some clout.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Are you okay? And I think in that moment, he just wanted to get under Nick's skin so bad that he did it. with me right across the table. Like there was just no, I just think there was no regard for me at all. Like I did not exist in JR's world during filming.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
engaged to this man uh i hope the same for aria and scotty but it's just these guys that they're casting i just want one guy to root for on these shows caleb was great what were your thoughts on caleb i loved caleb he's he's great i think he was also like one of the guys who just he just wanted to respect his girlfriend yeah i'm in this experience i really didn't want to be here for real for real but i'm gonna do it with you
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
And I just appreciated his approach with it. And I think he was a great pair for Aria because Aria needed someone that could be a little bit more softer with her and could help her calm down like.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
and everything so i really enjoyed caleb who are you closest to from the show today ari and i have been talking a lot lately chanel we're like reconnecting she lives all the way out in arizona so she'll be out here this week i hope that you get all the brand deals ever and you thrive in your world you're the only one brand deal worthy from this show oh stop oh
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Give everyone brand deals.
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
to see you know or hear from them I'm just excited for you guys to see the finale and reunion yes and then for everyone to be able to talk more about like their story because obviously up until this point we really couldn't share much so I just think when you hear everyone's perspective you might change your mind a little bit okay okay
The Viall Files
E856 - James Kennedy ARRESTED, Tom Sandoval Goes Live, Ultimatum’s Zaina, SNL’s Heidi Gardner, and RHOSLC
Thank you.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I was like, oh my God, look at this. He's like, oh, we should do it. And I'm like, oh my God, you're finally prioritizing our relationship because up until that point, marriage conversations were stalled. And I took his enthusiasm for wanting to do the show as like,
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
You were really single, single, single.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
So when you explain the show to your family, it's like... What was their reaction?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Yeah.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Oh, my God. Because he was married before. He was married before. So I thought that he just had some undoubted trauma with his, like, first marriage, engaged after that. Like, I thought there was just, like, a lot of trauma there. And I was excited to do the experiment because I'm like, you can't run from the mic or the producers. Like, we're going to have to, like, sit here and talk. Yeah, yeah.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Is that right?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Yeah, he did.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Wait, sorry. But with Temptation Island, is that considered like a hall pass? Or it's like people are supposed to still... They did set boundaries.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
And he crawls physical?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
JR, okay.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Here's the thing. If I sign up for Temptation Island, I know what I'm signing up for.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Like, that's, you know. Yeah, both to be tempted, right. Right, but I feel like with Ultimatum, it's like you are... In a marriage. Yeah, you're in a marriage. You're taking it, like, a little bit more seriously. But I will say, if they merged the two shows and I was able to see what was happening in the child marriage... I would have been different.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I would have been like, okay, that's the type of time we're on. Right. Gone. So I think that's the different, the main difference in the show is that people are able to see in real time what's going down and still knowing that they're being recorded in 4k and knowing that we're going to see it in while it now is crazy. That's crazy. Yeah. Yeah. That's wild.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I think, I would have acted the same, honestly.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
So... That's kind of how like we got there. And yeah. So once you get on the experiment, you break up with your original partner, you start dating the other people.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I think I would have honestly been the same that I was on Ultimatum because I definitely was open to it, even with the dating and Scotty. I was just like, all right, I'm open to this experience, but I wouldn't have crossed physical boundaries. That's just, to me, straight respect. But I would have definitely been flirty. Like, hey, let's have fun. But I don't know. That's just me in general.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
People think my personality is very flirty, but I'm just a very friendly person. Same.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I would have been a little tempted. Is this a blind date right now?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
My girl can dress, and she's a vibe, but go ahead.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Oh, my God.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
with beautiful women everyone was stunning by the way my season your cast was stunning I walked in I'm like oh there are tens all around and then you're just like bye babe hopefully one of these women will make you come back to me yeah is that the premise that's how like confident I was in my relationship I'm like I have nothing to worry about my man would never cheat little did you know
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Big back unite. Big back unite. Then you burn it all. Right.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Okay.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Casual? Is this a yes or no question? Whatever is speaking to your soul right now, I want to hear it. Okay, so I've been in a situation where a person didn't want to post me, and I thought it was because, oh, this is like your business page, like I want to respect that. I'm a very understandable person. Yeah, you are.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
But then realized later it was like because you probably want to do some shady stuff. Right, because you have a wife and kids. That's typically how it goes.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
But I would want to know like the real reason why. Yeah. Behind it. Right. So I wouldn't say like automatic deal breaker, but if it's giving red flaggy, like we are no longer blinded to red flags. Okay. So it's kind of. A deal breaker-ish caveat, like explain. Okay. But not for you.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Look at her. I love this for her. I love this for her.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
It's a deal breaker. Oh, you asked that. No, you got something to say. Go ahead, go ahead. It's a deal breaker. Deal breaker. Because I know I definitely want kids. We have some frozen options, but like, I definitely. The one's in the freezer. The one's in the freezer. I froze my eggs, by the way. Not that you needed to know. Not that you needed to know that at all.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I am 34, fresh 34, as of like two weeks ago, so you missed my birthday.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
But yeah, I really want kids, so I feel like if someone doesn't want to have kids, I know in the long term, I'll, you know, not resent them, but I'll be sad. Yeah, for sure.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I want two.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Little did I know. But like I said, blessing in disguise. So you break up, right? You start dating these other people. And then you do a trial marriage for three weeks with your trial person. So I was with someone. He was with someone. And you don't know what's going on, by the way. It's not like Temptation Island where they have the playbacks in real time. And you can watch it back.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
How many do you want? Two, huh?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Two or three. Boy and a girl? Or like you want two boys?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
My mom had five girls. Five? Oh, wow. I want a four, but it's like three girls and a boy.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Absolutely no. That's a deal breaker. That's a deal breaker for me because... Why you look over like that?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Like, you friends with your ex? Because I feel like if you have a lingering ex... there is still some type of tie. There's some type of soul tie. Like, why are they lingering? Why are they around? Unless it's like an ex from middle school, that doesn't count. I'm talking about like real life. We've dated like two, three years ago. There should be no tie to your ex at all. Sorry.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I don't well actually okay caveat I mean I'm friends with them on Instagram is that considered a tie I don't think so I'm talking about like you guys text you call going out for lunch you like hang out like your families are still like super intertwined I just think there should be like a clean break between that but there's obviously like room to explain if it's like a high school ex that's whatever childhood crush whatever sir can I curse on you
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I'll be the beep. Beep. So, cannot. That is a deal breaker.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Like, why are you friends?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Trauma bonding.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
So once you do the three weeks, you switch back over with your original partner. You do three weeks and you either make a decision to get engaged or move on.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I actually did. Holy shit. Was that on my face?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Like, I should have, like, cool. No. Okay, I'm going to let you go. Okay. I mean, obviously, there's a Rolodex of stories. But the one that pops to mind. So, I moved to New York for, like, 11 months. Didn't make it a whole year. COVID happened. Whatever. Okay. I felt like during that time, dating in New York was just like so crazy. I was on the apps.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
And this guy, one, the first day he asked me to come over and I was like, I'm not doing that. Like, what are we like? The first day. That's crazy. So then because the first date was just so out of the box crazy, you know, he was like, all right, well, why don't you come to my job? And he was like a part-time bartender. So I'm thinking... I'm like, why are you going? Now you're going to the office.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
So I'm like, okay, at least it's not your home. While he was working or... Girl, so I'm thinking this is after your shift and it's a bar, so maybe it's a vibe and you're not working, but we can chill. This man was actually working. Oh, he wanted you to tip him. Probably. So we're at the bar, right? It's still prime time. What? And he's literally like working. So it's like, hey, how are you?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Like, tell me about your childhood. All right, cool. Oh, margarita.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
He was actually working, so he invited me on the first date to his job so that he could just give me a free drink and, I don't know, me tip him. It was really strange.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I did not. Did you see him again? I did not. I was like, this is wild. How long did you stay? I mean, I definitely stayed way too long. So yeah, that's my life.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
He blocked me. Blocked you? It's so funny because the only reason I found out he blocked me because he was already muted. When I was on my healing journey, I was like, you know, you don't want things to be like triggering. Like I was still cool with him, but it's like I just didn't want to see him on my timeline. So I went out to drinks with Sandy and Aria right after the reunion.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I don't either. Okay, so it's moon, it's rising. That's all I know.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I mean, that's just one of the categories.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
That's crazy.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
You called your mom.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Were y'all compatible based on her chart?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I've been blocked too.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
By my ex. Did you just get blocked?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Before the show aired?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Stay in the present.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It is shocking, right? It is shocking. Especially when you like find out.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Oh, no.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Oh, no. You got to go on your page and figure it out.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I'm the one who's blocked. Holy shit. So he blocked me like really right after the reunion.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Yeah, so for my 33rd birthday last year, I decided to take that jump and just do it. I was talking to my OB for a while. There was a discount.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Not like in a shady way, but there was like this fertility clinic that was celebrating their 35th anniversary. So they had like a $3,500 like sale package. That's actually really cool.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
people know like it's very expensive so I was like this is a sign for me to do it and I was so grateful for that still dealing with some hormonal acne from that experiment experience but I'm just glad that I prioritized myself in that moment and what that the real reason too is because I didn't want
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
to be in a position where it's like, all right, now I'm 34, you know, and I don't want to settle for just whoever's the most convenient. And available at the time.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Like, I want to make sure whoever I end up being with, father of my kids, you know, it's the right person, right time, and I'm not making a rash decision because of a biological clock, which...
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Yeah, so that is something that has been super important to me. During that gray area with JR right after the show started, where I didn't know what was going on, very whiplash of how do we go from here to this extreme, I recognized that I wasn't prioritizing my health. I was falling into a depression where I wasn't eating, I wasn't moving, I didn't do the things that made me happy.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
And I had a moment where I was like, this is make or break. You either sink to this depression or you come out of it and know that God has a bigger plan for you. So that is what really initiated my relaunch into fitness and wellness. And it honestly saved me. A combination of God, my friends, family, therapy, it was a holistic thing to the point where I developed a journal.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I think we shy away from a lot of difficult conversations, but there is a way where you can frame it where both parties feel comfortable enough to be vulnerable.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
It's a guided journal on healing. after a breakup from a holistic standpoint because I recognize that going through a breakup is like going through the five stages of grief. You have to grieve the relationship that you once had, and the only way to come out of it stronger is letting yourself go through that process, but while you're going through it, it needs to be holistic, mind, body, and soul.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
We're out the dry season, ladies and gentlemen.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
There is a lot, but I would say my main takeaway is to choose someone who actively chooses you every day. Not to hold on to the honeymoon phase of a relationship or what someone did for you months ago, but to really just evaluate how someone is making you feel today. emotionally, physically, spiritually, like, a holistic standpoint. Are they growing with you?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Are they secure in themselves so they can be secure in the relationships? Like, there's just so much that I learned from that experiment. And just also just being really, like, confident in yourself and not holding on to something because of time. Don't hold on to a relationship because you invested time in it because... If it's not meant to be, don't force something to happen.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I think with me, I recognize that I'm a lover girl. I'll admit it. People have seen it. When I'm in love, I'm 100% invested. So it's hard for me to sometimes let go when I'm realizing that.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
they're not the right person for me but just having like that discernment when it is time to like move on because when you're dating you're not married and I would come into a relationship with like a marriage mindset and that's where I went wrong right so I love to hear that so is there anybody in like super super close proximity maybe sitting to the left of you are you really she's about to set us up on a date honestly no like
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
So the journal that I developed is something that came out of my personal healing journey where it goes through the five stages of grief, And each stage takes you through prompts that cover mind, body, and soul to make sure you're not neglecting any part of yourself.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
What are y'all doing after this?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
What are you doing today? I don't have plans yet. How long you in LA?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
We couldn't put it right here. Yeah. It is done. It's just now in production.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
So happy to be here.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Yeah, no, thank you. I would say the one thing that I recognize after that situation is that You have to stop romanticizing red flags. When you see a red flag, stop romanticizing red flags.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
It's not hot pink. We're not going to be colorblind in 2025. You have to take them for what they are and stop holding on to what someone did for you months ago. And also, anyone going through a healing journey, go through it. Don't try to move past it super quickly or neglect any part of yourselves. It's okay to cry, it's okay to be hurt, but don't fall into a sunken place.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I've been great. Honestly, the show was the biggest blessing in disguise. Not going to lie. Thank God for that. Afterwards, it's like a weight has been lifted. Everything's just been up and up after the show.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Like try and figure out ways to get yourself out of it and seek therapy. Like my therapist, I get chills talking about her. Same, I love my girl. Hell you. She was the biggest blessing because I exhausted my options of like my friends, like of course, but just having that therapeutic like approach to things. She gave me something so pivotal when I was seeking closure from, Jonathan.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
She was like, who's Jonathan? Oh, sorry. J.R. My bad. She was like, why are you seeking closure from him? Create your own closure. And everything that's happened is like evidence that gives you the power to create your own closure. That right there was a turning point for me where I was like, Yeah. Why am I trying to find closure from someone who has shown me over time how he feels about me?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I just need to take the ownership for myself and create my own. Are you dating? Are you in a relationship? Are you on apps? I am very single right now.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Very single. So I'm in the space in my life where I just want things to organically happen. And I'm not chasing anything. I'm allowing things to just, like,
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
come to me and so I've been like going on dates I've been like dating and it's been really difficult honestly why it's been once again now that I have like this new like level of understanding red flags and just like paying attention to the signs early on someone's consistency and how they show up and like aligning their words and actions hit different.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Where it's like, someone can actively pursue me, then they have my attention. If you have my attention, know it's rare. So take advantage or move out the way so someone else can create space.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I'm caught. Yeah, I'm caught up. Yeah, it's crazy.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Okay. No, me too, honestly.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
No, it's a lot. So, I mean, my hot take. I have a very just like balanced approach to things. And I think with co-parenting, like at the crux of like what's happening like in, you know, publicly, it's co-parenting. How do you healthily co-parent? And I really think at the end of the day, like they should both look at it and say like, what is the best for these kids?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Not ego.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
I don't understand how any of this is happening right now. Like, honestly, don't. Why is he releasing music? I don't understand any of that. But it's literally just coming down to, like, what is best for the child?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Yes. So the ultimatum is a crazy experiment where there are six couples and out of the couple, one person issues their partner an ultimatum, let's get married or break up. And so I was the person that issued my boyfriend at the time of three years an ultimatum. And even the way we kind of got on the show was that we saw an ad pop up for it and I brought it up as a joke.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
This is a lot. Like, I cannot imagine going to that.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Oh, my heart. What? Tell me. I mean, it just breaks for her. I don't, like, it's just, once again, things happening publicly, it's just, like, one of those things, it's like, how did we get here?
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Yeah. Me too. If we have says, free Wendy.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Everything can just be stripped away.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Like your independence, just like everything that you worked for, all of a sudden you have no control over it.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Where you feel like a prisoner in your own.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
We're manifesting Wendy right here in this seat.
What's the Reality?
Stand on It with Love is Blind's Ben and AD Plays Matchmaker with The Ultimatum's Zaina and Temptation Island's Hashim
Look, anything is possible.