You're Not a Cheerleader, You're a Coach

Send Us a Message (include your contact info if you'd like a reply)We talked earlier this year about why we hate toxic positivity and it obviously hit a nerve. It’s one of our most downloaded episodes, so we thought we’d unpack that a little more and spend some time chatting about why we want professional divorce coaches to stop referring to themselves as cheerleaders.Cheerleader: be an enthusiastic supporter of someone or somethingCoach: to teach, motivate, and support team members in reaching their potentialA cheerleader says "Yay, you can do it" but with the skill set you already have. On the other hand, a coach says "You can do it AND I’ll help you figure out what you need to be successful".Positive thinking or what we call toxic positivity is unhelpful, breaks trust, and can cause damage when clients are struggling with some of the difficulties of divorce. It doesn't include help to acquire the skills or insight to overcome the barriers or be able to accomplish their goals.Divorce coaching is a form of ADR - our job is to help our clients manage conflict, not ignore it. And in order to do that hard work of skill development or self-reflection, we need to build a foundation of trust by validating the client's feelings, not stepping over them.In other words, we have to name it to tame it to reframe it. Supporting clients to identify and process those emotions puts them in a better place to be ready to take action in their divorce or co-parenting process. And that's our ultimate goal.You can learn more about DCA™ or find out about any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: www.instagram.com/divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/company/divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected] Learn more about DCA® or any of the classes or events mentioned in this episode at the links below:Website: www.divorcecoachesacademy.comInstagram: @divorcecoachesacademyLinkedIn: divorce-coaches-academyEmail: [email protected]

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