This week’s hometowns include a canoe voyage and finding a long-lost sibling. Support this podcast by shopping our latest sponsor deals and promotions at this link: https://bit.ly/3UFCn1g. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Chapter 1: What is a mini-sode?
Do you see the logic that we're using here or are you fighting us tooth and nail?
What would you call it? We want to know. The maxi-sode? Maxi-sode? The midi sewed. Isn't that a, aren't like dresses midi now too? Yeah. The midi sewed. That's also a choice.
There's also the maxi pad sewed. Absolutely. With wings. One of our greatest bits of all time. The always maxi pad bit. Here we go. This is a classic hometown and the subject line is classic hometown POV from my six-year-old self. Great. Hi, ladies. I've been listening for years. Thanks to my amazing brother who introduced me to your pod.
Chapter 2: What is the classic hometown story about Chelsea King?
My boyfriend has suffered, and that suffered is in quotes, through hours of your show. Thanks to me. Thanks to me. Mine has too. We taught young women to de-center men by centering us. I love it. It's pretty intense. Yeah. I'm holding space for that. Okay. It literally says, okay, to this story. I've been wanting to share this story for months, and I'm finally getting around to sending it in.
My classic hometown story takes place in San Diego, Poe in 2010. I was only six years old at the time, but I remember this story so clearly, and I've always had a weird connection to the girl who died. Chelsea King was a 16-year-old track star from Poway High School who left her home on the morning of February 25th to go for her regular run at the Rancho Bernardino Community Park.
When she hadn't returned by 5 p.m. that evening, her family grew concerned and went to the park looking for her. The next day, her face was all over the local news and posters were plastered everywhere. A few days into the investigation, her underwear was found at Lake Hodges, 14 miles from where she went on her run.
Her DNA, as well as DNA from a registered sex offender, John Gardner, was found on her underwear. At that point, it was sadly clear that she would not be found alive. John Gardner was arrested on suspicion of first-degree murder, and on March 2, 2010, Chelsea's body was found in an isolated area of Lake Hodges.
When it came out that her body had been recovered, I can remember the news playing at my house for hours. She lived less than 10 minutes from me. Being a six-year-old girl, I obviously didn't know all the details of her death, but I was old enough to know that something really bad had happened to her. I remember mourning her death.
When family members would talk about her, they would always look at me and say the same thing. You look just like her. Oh, for a little, for a child. Don't say that to a child, everyone. And then it says that I was stuck with me. And as a six-year-old, all I could see was myself 10 years later when she would be on the TV screen in my living room.
I remember crying over her death and having so many confusing thoughts. I wanted to write her and her family letters. Obviously, those letters were just a confusing rambling of words. It didn't make sense because I I was a first grader, but for whatever reason, I felt heartbroken over her death.
The reason is because you have empathy and it's somebody in your community and it's you learning about bad things happen in the world.
Totally. It's so normal and actually, you know, it'd be abnormal if you didn't do that. You know what I mean? Exactly.
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Chapter 3: How did Chelsea King's case impact the community?
It's never. You're never. No, no, no.
Unless you're a nun. Yeah. And even then, maybe not. Like the idea, the whole idea of drinking is for more drinking. Totally. That's what it does. Yes. That's a, that's a very me statement, but it's the truth. It's like, that's the whole deal. You break down. That's why it's addictive. It's the point of it.
The better, the more you have, the more you, the more, the better you get at it. What's the one is too many. A thousand isn't enough. Like, come on.
Same with donuts.
Okay. We would be home before dark. If they needed anything, Carly had a device she could text us from and we still had a home phone. Everything's fine. Great. I'm a rather forgetful person and I'm always leaving things behind, especially my phone. I realized after we got to the restaurant that I had left my phone at home, but my husband had his, so no big deal, right?
And at this point, you'd have the husband text the daughter and be like, yo, text me if anything comes up, right?
Oh, that's a good plan.
Yeah. They didn't do that.
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Chapter 4: What funny story does the listener share about being a 'trash mom'?
At this point, I was like, I'm going to get baked potato skins. Oh, potato skins. Potato skins.
That sounds so good.
I'm just saying there's no parental skills in me whatsoever where it's like, wait, here's how we should take care of this problem. Here's best practices for children watching children.
It's like, where's my Long Island iced tea? I don't care about anything else. I have one hour to party out of my way. We ordered some munchies, potato skins, and had a couple of rounds of drinks with my husband as designated driver. We were all having fun and of course completely lost track of time. Just before 10, my husband got a text message from Carly asking when we were coming home.
He said we were on our way and we rushed back home. We felt guilty about being gone so long, but it got so much worse when I picked up my phone at home and saw a series of missed calls and texts from her like, when are you coming home? Should I put Julia to bed? I put Julia to bed. Are you guys coming home? Of course, she sent all of these to me before she bothered to text or call her dad.
Of course. Yeah. Then Carly told us how she and Julia climbed into Carly's bed to read some stories and there was a spider in her bed. That might not sound like much of a problem, but I have unfortunately passed my arachnophobia to my daughters. So that is a big deal. So she had to kill a spider in her own bed, no doubt with five-year-old Julia screaming the whole time.
Needless to say, I felt like the worst mom ever. Actually, we felt so bad that after I overpaid her for babysitting, both of my brothers paid her too. She made over $60 in those three traumatic hours. Yes, girl. So it wasn't for nothing. That's right. That's all that matters if you can get a little money for the trauma. Like acknowledge my trauma monetarily. That's all we're asking for.
That's how we make up for it. That's what suing people is. Our Carly, who just turned 18, has never let us forget the time mom and dad were only going to be gone an hour and just abandon us. But both our girls have turned out pretty great. Y'all are the best. I'm a year one listener and really loving the MFM Rewind episodes. I was a skipper for the first few years, but I'm a skipper no more.
God.
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Chapter 5: What lesson did the listener learn from their experience as a parent?
How dare you? 11 these days is like young though. We were smoking fucking cloves already, but these days.
Yeah, it's so young and it's so not at home by yourself with little kids. No, no. Also, it is that thing where it's like whether it's a spider in your bed or just the idea that suddenly like you look into the kitchen and everything looks kind of sinister and sharp.
Yeah.
Like it's just like it's such a young. It's the first time to be like, oh, and if something goes down, it's on me. And it's so quiet the first time you're like home alone. So quiet. Especially when you hear the scratching in the attic. Yeah. Right? Oof. I was home by myself, but I was like 21 or two. And I heard something in the attic. And I had a cat that was just staring at the attic.
I was like, it was probably a possum. Yeah. But then when I was like, so I went into my parents, like, it's going to sound super fancy, but they have a walk-in closet that's the most low-key walk-in closet of all time.
It's like you can step inside. Yeah.
Yeah. It's very like 1987 version. But I went to try the door and it felt like someone was pressing back against the door. And I ran. I just ran, got into my car and drove out to my old neighbor's house. And I was like, it was like almost midnight. I was like, he's like, what are you doing? And I'm like, you have to come back with me. I think someone's at my parents' house.
And I made him come and like check the entire house.
Good for you. I would have been like, I'm pretending that didn't happen. And like...
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Chapter 6: What is the runaway child story about?
Oh, you see fucking everything when I'm trying to be sneaky and then I'm trying to do a show. I'm not going to tell you the title of this one, but you'll probably get it. Okay. Hi, everyone. That it just goes into. Somewhere in the Midwest during the 80s, my younger sister and I were dragged to my grandpa's house so the family could go out back and play cards.
Like, what would you give to fucking be there right now? Right? In the 60s, you said? 80s, even. In the Midwest, playing cards in the backyard.
I mean, just, you know there's cafe lights hung from a tree to the back porch balcony. Roof.
And speaking of Miller High Life, there's just like bottles popping, right?
And if you're going to talk about cafe lights, you better be talking about Miller High Life, girl. That's our song. That's our country song we're about to write. Get ready.
When we first arrived, everyone ate dinner and then the kids were promptly shoved into the spare room to, quote, play. This bedroom was circa 1960 with shag carpet, rock hard bed. My grandma had this fucking room. Everything smelled musty and it had a small TV with a VCR in the bottom to play Lassie for the hundredth time. Like, I am there. Yeah. You know? It was kid prison, which is one word.
I'm about seven and the oldest between all the kids. There are five of us bored out of our minds. So naturally we need to do something about that. Earlier during dinner, I remembered seeing this massive jar in the fridge filled with red stuff. And before being shoved into kid prison, I got a sneak peek. Now to the master plan.
I convinced my cousin to go with me to get the jar because it's a two-man job. Plus, I had another cousin being lookout. We were sophisticated criminals then. We managed to slowly carry this massive jar of cherries to the kid prison where we all stood around and admired its glory. There's nothing better in life when you're a child than maraschino cherries.
I'm sorry to keep on talking about Nora, but she, to this day, anytime we go out to eat lunch or dinner, she's like,
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