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Table Read

The Jew Who Saved Christmas - Act 3

22 Dec 2024

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Act 3: The Jew Who Saved Christmas Strap in, folks—Act 3 of The Jew Who Saved Christmas takes the chaos of Acts 1 and 2, sprinkles it with some Christmas magic, and cranks it up to “Holy latke, is this really happening?” With Santa still higher than your cousin at a Phish concert, Bernie finds herself fully in charge of the sleigh, a bag of presents, and the fate of Christmas itself. No pressure, right? From a showdown at TSA (where Bernie proves that saving Christmas sometimes means dodging tasers) to a rooftop brawl with reindeer in full meltdown mode, Bernie’s journey is a mix of slapstick comedy and heartfelt moments. There’s a rogue gingerbread elf screaming on the sleigh radio, Santa pulling Die Hard-level stunts, and Bernie dropping life advice on orphans like she’s a jaded holiday therapist. Did we mention she’s doing this all while rocking a pair of Uggs and the lingering regret of having roofied the big guy in red? But it’s not all chaos (okay, it’s mostly chaos). Bernie starts to realize that maybe—just maybe—this whole fiasco is more than a holiday disaster. Maybe it’s her chance to prove she’s not the screw-up everyone thinks she is. Or maybe it’s just a chance to survive one more sleigh ride without hurling. Either way, it’s pure comedic gold. The Cast Still Slaying It: Jeff Bergman, Selyna Warren, Jim O’Heir, Marissa Read, John Milhiser, Kiel Kennedy, Tiffany Black, Carla Delaney, Ashley Bell, and David Jacks continue to bring their A-game, balancing over-the-top laughs with just the right amount of holiday heart. ✨Act 3 of The Jew Who Saved Christmas is what happens when Elf meets Superbad at a menorah-lighting party. It’s absurd, hilarious, a little sweet, and the perfect ending to a holiday tale that’s anything but traditional. Whether you’re here for the laughs, the feels, or just to see how Bernie gets out of this mess, you won’t be disappointed.🎄🔥Big thanks to Mood.com our partner in high vibes. Use code TABLEREAD20 for 20% off at Mood.com. Legal THC & CBD. Nationwide. You’re welcome.Our Sponsors:* Check out Mood and use my code TABLEREAD for a great deal: https://mood.com* Check out Progressive: https://www.progressive.comAdvertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

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Transcription

Full Episode

1.428 - 24.203 Advertisement

Do you want to help kids with their feelings but aren't sure how? You're not alone. Research shows many adults struggle to support kids' mental health. But help is here. Backed by experts at the Nationwide Children's Hospital, the Kids Mental Health Foundation offers free resources to help you create a supportive environment for the kids in your life. Visit kidsmentalhealthfoundation.org for more.

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24.623 - 26.765 Advertisement

Because kids' mental health starts with us.

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35.649 - 65.709 Santa Claus

Santa welcomes you back to the North Pole. I hope you've California sobered up and can remember what happened in our previous episode. But if not, jolly old St. Nick will egg jog your memory. After a rocky start delivering Christmas, not to mention breaking out of TSA prison, Bernie started to get the hang of stealing my identity. Christmas was going off without a hitch.

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66.409 - 112.725 Santa Claus

But as I continued on my journey of Jewish weed-themed miracles, the sleigh's autopilot accidentally got turned back on. Bernie and I were lured back to the North Pole by the elves who were not jolly. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. But Bernie, like a typical Jew, refused to do that. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. But Bernie, like a typical Jew, refused to admit defeat.

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113.385 - 140.249 Santa Claus

She evaded Santa's helpers and stole the sleigh. I tagged along, stuck in a munchie-themed miracle, and we took off in hopes that Bernie could be the Jew who saved Christmas. Like a typical joke. Oh, that is the funniest. For the record, it is in this script.

140.709 - 143.371 Character Name (Unknown)

I really like that line.

144.912 - 156.396 Bernie

Episode 3, Exterior Night Sky, Oregon, PST. The wind whips through Santa and Bernie's hair as Santa chomps at clouds. Mmm, cotton candy.

156.576 - 172.052 Character Name (Unknown)

Careful. You don't want to gain the 4-20-20. Or in my case, 50. God, what a rush. Did you see me own that takeoff? I didn't know you were going to be there, and I still just went for it. I could see how you get hooked on this every year. What do we got left?

172.577 - 181.03 Bernie

Santa hands Bernie the magical scroll, which is now covered in chocolate goo. Bernie Jewish Mothers the list by licking her finger and wiping goo away.

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