Dave Hughes has a complicated relationship with his ego. 🎟️ Our live show Together Again is on sale! One show left! Tickets here - https://bit.ly/4mEK9Ep Performing in prestigious venues around the world, Dave Hughes has solidified himself as on of Australia’s comedy icons, but the journey was (and still is) far from easy. Joining us in the studio today, Dave vulnerably shares how the burden of feeling unworthy affected his ability to give and receive love. Dave chats to Ryan about how much he has struggled with comparison, both with others, and the success of his past self, and the role that ego plays in never being able to turn down an opportunity. Hughesy, thank you so much for joining us. 0:00 – Ryan got papped, Hugh got crumpets7:19 – The failures that lead to success17:12 – A feeling of general greatness21:06 – Reckoning with comparison30:18 – The joy is in the giving36:03 – Walking the family / work tightrope41:07 – Humour as a way in47:56 – You had me at IMAX helmet56:00 – Ego doesn’t let you enjoy the moment1:08:10 – Five strategies to let go of ego If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/ogE4j-UQIGY 🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode: Kate Langbroek - Love Story - https://bit.ly/44OH66q Dr Emily - Other People Matter - https://bit.ly/3MqGNZj Pat Cummins - Love, Loss & Life - https://bit.ly/3MtSgqX Cate Campbell - Even Olympians Have Depression - https://bit.ly/44TRhXp 🎄Other Xmas Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode: Santa Claus - A Special Vulnerabilitea House - https://bit.ly/48P0X6V Mrs Claus - Santa’s Better Half - https://bit.ly/44g5M7J Little Boy Christmas - The Forgotten Son of Mr & Mrs Claus - https://bit.ly/3KHqx5F 📖 Things to read A New Earth, by Eckhart Tolle - https://bit.ly/4rPfS9B 💻Things to look up Oprah’s series with Eckhart Tolle - https://bit.ly/48vfOo6 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, (with the new cards!) purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 💌Join 3,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy 🩵To join our patreon community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://bit.ly/4mq5BO5 The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Chapter 1: What challenges does Dave Hughes face regarding his ego?
Dave Hughes. By all objective measures, you're extremely successful and extremely popular in Australia. But what do you struggle with?
Over the years, I've struggled with comparison, comparing yourself to others, comparing yourself to yourself. I mean, I'm losing my memory. I'm losing my teeth. I'm from the country, though.
Chapter 2: How did failures contribute to Dave Hughes's success?
Your teeth fall out, you get on with your day. But, yeah, I would have times where you're walking down the street with, like, you know, Hamish and Andy and you're like, oh, shit, what if I have to take the photo? Welcome to my world. I was so scared of girls. I lost my virginity in a brothel at the age of 22. I was worried about being ugly, worried about not being good looking from really young.
Curious to know how you define ego or how does ego play out for you?
The job is to forget yourself. We are all just figments of our own imagination. I have worshipped at the shrine of Dave Hughes since I was about three.
Chapter 3: What role does comparison play in Dave's life?
You know, constantly try to make that shrine prettier by achieving stuff. It is absolute bullshit. So burn down the shrine.
We're all imperfect. And on this podcast, I'll be chatting with a variety of interesting people who are willing to make themselves vulnerable by sharing their own struggles and imperfections. I'm Hugh van Kylenberg from The Resilience Project.
And I'm Ryan Shelton from My Mum. And I'm Josh from Hugh's Mum. And this is The Imperfects. Well, who would have thought at the end of the year that Dave Hughes would give us what I think is maybe one of the most spiritual eps of the year, particularly at the end of the chat that we're about to play with him.
It's like I've known Dave since, you know, since Rove days, but like I feel like he's really evolved in a really incredible way. So that's not a mode you're used to, that kind of? I mean, I don't know him that well, but I've never heard him speak like that.
Chapter 4: How does Dave find joy in giving?
So, yeah. So, it's pretty... I absolutely loved this chat so much more than I already knew I would.
He was in all sorts as well when we did the interview. If you remember, he'd had his ribs smashed to smithereens in that celebrity football game.
About two days earlier or three days earlier.
Yeah.
Chapter 5: What strategies does Dave use to balance work and family?
And so, we went to reschedule the interview and he said, no, I'll be fine. He just came straight from hospital, I think. Yeah. Just... He was in all sorts.
Chapter 6: How does humor help Dave cope with challenges?
There was every chance he was high as a kite, but we don't know that. We don't know that. But he was very, very... He said some quite profound things.
Yeah, it was beautiful. It was a really interesting chat. He talked about what it's like having incredibly low self-worth as a young person, sort of late teen years into his early 20s. He's really, like his confidence with, in many areas, but sounds like confidence with the opposite sex was almost zero. And it's this really interesting journey of going from that low self-worth.
He talks about stopping drinking. And then becoming really famous and sort of analysing the ego and his ego and how to handle that as now an incredibly successful comedian for what, 25, 30 years?
Yeah. We should also just point out the fact that, Josh, you've got a little sniffle. So you've got a little bit of a, your voice sounds a little bit different than it would normally sound.
Yeah, I don't feel too bad.
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Chapter 7: Why does Dave believe ego prevents enjoyment of the moment?
Just sound weird.
Yeah. Sorry, Hugh.
No, no, I was just saying I remember listening to him back in, it would have been 99, 2000-ish. I had a part-time job. There was a gym attached to five tennis courts and I would open the gym and the tennis courts at, it was 5.30 in the morning, but his first-
Great ref.
We've got heaps of emails about that.
Yeah, but Avenue is going to go nuts.
Surprisingly, he's filled with a double A at the end, which I don't think anyone saw coming. So one of my jobs at 6am, I had to sweep all the tennis courts, all five tennis courts. And that took about probably close to an hour, maybe 45 minutes.
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Chapter 8: What are five strategies to let go of ego according to Dave?
That's not important. But I remember Husey and Kate had just started their first ever radio show on Nova. Nova was a brand new station.
And this was Husey and Kate Langbrook, who we've also had on the show.
They kind of launched the station, didn't they? Yep.
Yeah. And I loved it so much that I would put it on the speakers out onto the tennis courts because there wasn't like, you didn't have headphones. People weren't rolling around with headphones and listening to stuff then.
So I'd have the speakers at six o'clock in the morning, which is terrible for the neighbours, but just listening to Husey and Kate, just so I wouldn't miss a bit because I just love them so much.
Yeah. No, he's a legend. He's just like a legend as a guy, but also like a literal legend of comedy in Australia.
And you and he also got papped together after the interview, if you remember.
Yeah, I walked him down to wait. We ordered an Uber for him. And then, yeah, there was like a paparazzi waiting. I think because of the injury that he had from the thing, he was sort of in the news.
Oh, yeah, it wasn't because he was doing an episode with us. No, definitely.
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