Alex Malcolm

And that's why the English team needs to represent the people they play for.

That's right.

And to finish up, Hass Down Under says, got an absolute classic dose of Associate Nation peak grade cricket for the podcast.

Okay, let's just fucking settle down with the association.

It's an absolute classic dose of Associate Nation peak grade cricket.

So let's be honest.

People that play Associate Nation cricket, they wouldn't play any level of cricket in Australia.

Yeah, this morning Maldives was playing Myanmar in the ACC Challenger Cup.

One of the Maldivian batters was flying and neared a milestone.

Our hero thinks he's on 99.

Down on the boundary, the coach looks at his own handwritten textbook score sheet, crunches some highly questionable math, and frantically instructs a dugout to start clapping because according to his book, the lad has just ticked over to 100.

The batter sees the boys up on their feet, fully believing the coach.

He rips his helmet off, raises his bat, and absorbs the glorious applause for a historic international century.

The main umpire walks over deadpan and says, put your helmet back on, mate.

You're on 99.

The absolute psychological damage was instant.

He faces up next over, completely rattled, and gets caught out for 99.

Coach of the year performance right there.

So how does the umpire know he's on 99?

Were you a run counter?