Alfie

Terry, the ambulance guy I've known for years, told me they thought it was a mugging, that she'd been drinking out with her friends and got separated from them, and when they found her, her throat was torn out and she was barely conscious. I don't remember what I said in response. It's not my job to care, and not about that.

Terry, the ambulance guy I've known for years, told me they thought it was a mugging, that she'd been drinking out with her friends and got separated from them, and when they found her, her throat was torn out and she was barely conscious. I don't remember what I said in response. It's not my job to care, and not about that.

The girl's eyes were half open, her hands were clammy, loosely clutched over her chest, sat in dress torn to allow for heart monitors. Her blood pressure was through the floor. Her oxygen levels were no better. Beneath the pad of gauze, her wound was jagged and strange, but despite its depth, it was no longer bleeding. The ragged flesh looked grey and almost dry.

The girl's eyes were half open, her hands were clammy, loosely clutched over her chest, sat in dress torn to allow for heart monitors. Her blood pressure was through the floor. Her oxygen levels were no better. Beneath the pad of gauze, her wound was jagged and strange, but despite its depth, it was no longer bleeding. The ragged flesh looked grey and almost dry.

I didn't have time to think beyond assessing that this wouldn't be the thing that killed her right away. With trauma, it's about priorities, and right then what we needed to do was whatever we could to get as much fluid into her system as possible. She came in pre-hooked up to IV fluids. Ambulance Terry's work was nimble and efficient as always. The girl's breath was becoming heavy and slow.

I didn't have time to think beyond assessing that this wouldn't be the thing that killed her right away. With trauma, it's about priorities, and right then what we needed to do was whatever we could to get as much fluid into her system as possible. She came in pre-hooked up to IV fluids. Ambulance Terry's work was nimble and efficient as always. The girl's breath was becoming heavy and slow.

That's normal when your blood pressure is low, but it's not a good sign. When you first start losing blood, your heart beats faster and your breath speeds up. There's less blood in the system, so your body is working extra hard to make sure that what is left is being used as best it can be. When things start to slow down like that, it means your body's running out of steam.

That's normal when your blood pressure is low, but it's not a good sign. When you first start losing blood, your heart beats faster and your breath speeds up. There's less blood in the system, so your body is working extra hard to make sure that what is left is being used as best it can be. When things start to slow down like that, it means your body's running out of steam.

It was very clear the girl on the gurney was almost entirely steamless by that point. She was in shock. What I remember really distinctly was she looked at me with those half-shut eyes and she tried to say something, but I don't know what it was. I couldn't hear her, so I just smiled and said something generic, like, we're going to look after you, like I would to anyone.

It was very clear the girl on the gurney was almost entirely steamless by that point. She was in shock. What I remember really distinctly was she looked at me with those half-shut eyes and she tried to say something, but I don't know what it was. I couldn't hear her, so I just smiled and said something generic, like, we're going to look after you, like I would to anyone.

She looked me in the eye and it wasn't acceptance exactly, but it was like, She knew. She smiled as best she could, and very slightly shook her head. Behind me, I could hear the junior doctor, Hayley, going spare, talking fast about calling the consultant, about booking a surgery suite, about ordering more bloods, more fluids to restock the fridges, and I couldn't make my body move.

She looked me in the eye and it wasn't acceptance exactly, but it was like, She knew. She smiled as best she could, and very slightly shook her head. Behind me, I could hear the junior doctor, Hayley, going spare, talking fast about calling the consultant, about booking a surgery suite, about ordering more bloods, more fluids to restock the fridges, and I couldn't make my body move.

Hayley grabbed my arm, waffling still about calling the consultant or whatever, and I looked up from the patient's half-lidded eyes, and Hayley just immediately shut up. It felt like we stood there in silence for ages, It was probably only a second or two, really.

Hayley grabbed my arm, waffling still about calling the consultant or whatever, and I looked up from the patient's half-lidded eyes, and Hayley just immediately shut up. It felt like we stood there in silence for ages, It was probably only a second or two, really.

It was one of those transparent moments where you can see right through to exactly what is going to happen next, but for now you're just stuck there, knowing. Powerless. Hayley released her grip on my arm and swallowed. Her expression was set, drained, and we were both completely still for a second, looking at the girl on the gurney. I nodded at Hayley. She nodded back.

It was one of those transparent moments where you can see right through to exactly what is going to happen next, but for now you're just stuck there, knowing. Powerless. Hayley released her grip on my arm and swallowed. Her expression was set, drained, and we were both completely still for a second, looking at the girl on the gurney. I nodded at Hayley. She nodded back.

We did everything we could, filled her with fluids, blood, plasma, but she died there, on the gurney, just like Hayley and I both knew she would. Hastily fitted IVs were stopped, monitors detached. I closed her eyes.

We did everything we could, filled her with fluids, blood, plasma, but she died there, on the gurney, just like Hayley and I both knew she would. Hastily fitted IVs were stopped, monitors detached. I closed her eyes.

Hayley performed the slow, arduous task of pronouncing the definitely dead girl dead, and me and the other nurses went back to flitting between other patients in A&E as best as we could. All in, it was 32 minutes since she came through the door.

Hayley performed the slow, arduous task of pronouncing the definitely dead girl dead, and me and the other nurses went back to flitting between other patients in A&E as best as we could. All in, it was 32 minutes since she came through the door.