Alicia Abbott

Well, I think from a young age, I realized I was something different in this community because it was a community of, you know, young men.

And here I was a little girl.

So I didn't see other little girls around.

So I was always felt different.

But from an early age, I sort of liked this difference.

That meant I could get all the attention.

There was no one like me.

And I felt sort of special in a way.

But I think on one level, as a straight child of a gay parent, I always felt like a little too straight for the gay community, but also a little too gay for the straight community.

So I think I felt a little bit ill at ease in either world.

Do you think anybody was hoping that you'd be – anybody in your father's circle or your father himself had hoped in any way that you'd be gay, that you'd be a lesbian?

I was a little too straight for the gay community, meaning not that my sexuality was too straight.

I was a little girl, but that my presence was reminding people of a world of sort of traditional family structure and responsibility that some people were trying to escape from.

I think in my dad's journals, he wrote that children were sort of the ultimate freak out for

Absolutely.

He in some of his writing, he wrote about how growing up he felt like, you know, the only gay boy in Nebraska.

And now he felt like the only gay father in San Francisco.

And so that, you know, it made him feel a little isolated.

It didn't give him as much freedom to go out for a while.

I think he would have us living with roommates because it was a way for him to get free access to babysitting.