Allie Beth Stuckey
Appearances
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Yeah, I just wanted to also point out that it not only harms the very people that I call them empathy mongers, say that they're trying to help. But it also, when we're talking about the gender issue and in the book, I talk about abortion, I talk about gender, I actually talk about sexuality. justice versus social justice and illegal immigration. So this is just one of the topics that I get into.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
But one of the features of toxic empathy is that it blinds you to or purposely ignores the people on the other side of the moral equation. And so they will force you to only look at the person that they hoist up as a victim. But Gender ideology doesn't just harm those people. It harms the people on the other side. So it harms the young girl, Peyton McNabb.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
I had her on my show, who is the young 17-year-old volleyball player who played a volleyball match against a boy who identified as the opposite sex. And he spiked the ball into her face. She is still dealing with paralysis from that. And she had a brain bleed and she will deal with some effect of that injury for the rest of her life.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
And so these women who are not only losing scholarships, but in many cases being violated, being assaulted. being actually physically harmed because we have accepted this self-identification model for your sex and for the spaces that you enter, they are victims in this. And that's what toxic empathy does. It makes you think that, say, abortion is only about what the woman wants.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Gender is only about what the person who is confused about their gender wants. Immigration is only about the person who wants to enter the country. It's never about the people who are harmed by these decisions.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
And all I'm asking people to do, this book is specifically written for Christians, but it could be for anyone, is for us to think harder about that, to think about the people that are affected on both sides of the issue and to submit ourselves to truth, factual truth. And of course, I believe as a Christian, biblical truth.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
So I start each chapter actually telling a story, a heart-rending story from the left-wing perspective, because I want people to understand what toxic empathy looks like. So in the immigration chapter, I actually tell a story of Maribel Diaz, this woman who fled violence in Mexico. She came here with her family. She was deported under Donald Trump. The story was originally told by USA Today.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
And by the end of it, just like in each chapter, I actually want the reader to say, Maybe I do agree with progressives on this because, gosh, this has me in my feels. I feel so much empathy for this person that I cannot see the other side of this issue. But then what I do is I tell an equally heart-rending story from the other side.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
So in the same chapter, I tell in great detail the story of Kate Steinle, who at 32 years old was shot in the back by an illegal alien. In San Francisco, her last words were, help me, daddy, as she breathed her last breath. This person had been deported several times and had committed violent crimes, but San Francisco's sanctuary city policies shielded him.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
And that was a preventable crime, and yet she died. And so I do the same thing in every chapter because I want people to understand that, yeah, you're only hearing this heart-rending story from the progressive perspective about this one person. But let me shift your focus to the person on the other side of this.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
But at the end of the day, I don't just want to have competing anecdotes because there are people on every side of every issue that are affected and have really important stories. But at the end of the day, the question is, what is true? What is true in principle when it comes to immigration? The truth is, is that countries should be sovereign. We should have a right to our borders.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
We should have a right to protect our citizens. We should, in principle, put our citizens first. But also, when you look at the statistics of the crimes committed, unfortunately, by illegal immigrants, and we realize that every single one of those crimes is preventable, that also gives us a perspective of what is really going on versus what the
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
What I prescribe, especially for the Christians, but again, this could apply to anyone, is a truth in love approach. It's not cruelty. It's not callousness. It's not being mean or be offensive for the sake of being mean or offensive at all. It's actually believe in gentleness. But I do believe in being kind. on wavering in the truth.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
And I do believe that telling the truth, especially about these big issues that have such great consequences for people, especially young people, when it comes to things like gender, is actually the most loving approach. So truth and love, I think, is much more effective in changing people for the better than this toxic empathy.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Yeah, you know, I think so. And some people think that we can somehow separate what we believe about God or what we believe religiously from public life and our conversations about law and politics. But the fact of the matter is, is that every single law, every policy,
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
that we advocate for goes back to a worldview, a definition of morality, a belief in some kind of moral authority who gets to say what's good and what's bad. And I think that we are so scared of offending. We are so scared of coming off as unempathetic that we are unwilling to say, no, this is the definition of what is good. This is the definition of what is bad.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
And of course, in a pluralistic society, we're going to have disagreements and we're going to have debates and discussions surrounding those things. But we at least have to acknowledge, that there is a truth, that there is a reality. C.S. Lewis in Mere Christianity, when he is trying to confront this myth of moral relativism, he points out two important things. One is an analogy.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
If I'm drawing a picture of New York City, first of all, it's gonna be really bad because I'm not an artist. Versus an artist who drew a picture of New York City, someone would be able to tell you that this is closer to the real New York. My rendering of New York is not just as accurate as someone else's rendering of New York.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Someone who has seen New York can tell you this is what Times Square looks like, this drawing, and this drawing is further away. And morality is the same way. There may be some debate when it comes to the depictions of New York that are actually closer to what it actually looks like. But there is no debate that that really exists and that some renderings are closer than others.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
And the second thing that he points out that has been so helpful for me is that no one is a moral relativist when it comes to themselves. You might say, oh, you know, every culture has a different set of rules that's just as good as another. But if someone steals from you or if someone assaults you, all of a sudden a person becomes a moral absolutist.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
No one who has been assaulted themselves, been violated, been stolen from says, well, that person probably believed that was fine and it's okay. No, you're looking for vengeance. You're looking for justice. You're looking for some kind of recompense because they have violated you.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
So really at the end of the day, we all need to acknowledge that moral objectivity exists and we at the very least have to strive together to get as close to that as possible.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Yes, I am.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Yes, my other book, You're Not Enough and That's Okay. And both of these titles, I haven't meant for them to be jarring, honestly, but I write to a mostly female audience and I guess they have been for some people, but I'm glad for that because I think it's caught the attention of the people that I'm trying to talk to. And basically what I argue is that this book
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
industry of self-love is, it's very contradictory. And while these people are simultaneously telling you that you are perfect and enough the way you are, they are also trying to sell you their latest program that's going to make you even more perfect and more enough. And it starts with this lie that women in particular have this inner goddess and she was perfect basically when we were born.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
But as soon as we entered earth side, it was marred and it was suppressed by the patriarchy or by capitalism or by your toxic mom or by all of these unrealistic expectations and unfair standards and society and boyfriends and all of this different stuff. And so It's really a form of trendy narcissism.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
It encourages women to find and release that inner goddess through a journey of self-love and self-fulfillment. And once you really put yourself first and you throw off anyone and anything that gets in your way, then you will finally and fully be happy. But most of the people propagating this message are not happy. Most of them do not have whole and healthy relationships.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Most of them are also looking for their next fix. So either you really are enough and sufficient completely by yourself or you need their books and your programs, but it can't be both. And basically my premise is that the self can't be the problem and the solution. If inside yourself, you are finding all of these issues, all these things that you lack,
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
peace, satisfaction, you're not going to find the solution to those things in the same way that you find your problems. And again, this is a Christian book. And I believe that the only place that we can find our fulfillment and find our purpose and find who we really are is in the God who made us.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Just like the maker of anything is the only person that can tell you how it's made, why it's made and what it's used for. I believe that people are the same way. And it's when we get outside of ourselves that stop over focusing on ourselves constantly, that we can find true satisfaction.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Yeah, you're absolutely right. Now, I think a lot of people that actually are okay with illegal immigration because they think maybe it helps the progressive side of things. They'll be able to grant mass amnesty one day and they'll be able to vote Democrat and secure Democrat dynasty forever and ever.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
I don't think it would even shake out that way when you look at the exit polling and the demographics from the last election. But regardless, I think that they probably are thinking what you just said. You got to break a few eggs to make an omelet. And if someone like Laken Riley has to sacrifice her life for us to basically reformulate that,
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
the power structure in the United States and change the demographics to secure progressive power, then that's what we are going to have to do. And so I'm not sure that they would actively and overtly show empathy for her killer, but we certainly see a lot of ignoring from the progressive side of this. I mean, obviously, when we saw George Floyd die or when we even saw the person Jacob
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Blake be shot in the back by a police officer. It's not like Democrats don't know what's going on in the news. I mean, there were black squares posted. There were all kinds of memorials and public displays. There were corporations who were
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
starting these resolutions to change the country for the better, but I'm not seeing that kind of honor and that kind of outrage for Lake and Riley, at least not from the mainstream. However, I do think this story is showing people, more people than usual, the dangers of letting people in unmitigated and unvetted, and that it's really not fair.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
It's not that every illegal alien is going to commit a violent crime or an additional crime, but it's that every crime that is committed by an illegal immigrant is preventable. We already have citizens that commit crimes. There is no reason to add to those crimes by people who shouldn't be here in the first place. And I lived in Athens, Georgia, where Lakin was martyred. murdered.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
I have family there. I know that community very well. In Athens-Clarke County, where she was murdered, it is very progressive. And yet they ousted handily the DA that originally charged Ibarra and did not pursue the death penalty because she has been so soft on crime and soft on things like illegal immigration. that she lost her election, even in a progressive county.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Well, thank you so much. Thanks. It's an honor to be here.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
So I know that's just one example, but I do think people are waking up to this. And I think the national election proves that as well.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Yes, that is true. And we do believe in original sin that we are fallen creatures. The Bible teaches that we have inherited the sin of Adam. And that's why Jesus is so great. He's presented as the second Adam because through Adam, we got sin, we got death, we got brokenness, what we call in the Christian world, fallenness.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Man fell and we've been suffering all of the repercussions of that since then. But through Jesus... the second Adam, we get redemption and we get forgiveness and we get sacrifice from sin. So really the whole gospel is the idea that like we are not enough. I know that we're talking about toxic empathy, but my second book is that we're actually not good enough. We're not enough on our own.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
We're not enough for our own salvation. You talked about reaching a higher truth. Of course, we believe that. And we believe that that truth is in Jesus Christ himself, but I mean, speaking of Jesus, when we're talking about toxic empathy, some people believe that, well, actually it's Jesus who taught that empathy is the most important value, but that's not really true.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
He said that the greatest commandments are to love God and love our neighbor. And if we love God, he says, you will keep his commandments. And so actually, the love that we are called to as Christians is inextricably intertwined with the truth. Actually, 1 Corinthians 13, 6 says that love never rejoices in wrongdoing. It never rejoices in wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
And so, I mean, you're right about the theology that is really opposed to a lot of the postmodern, morally relativistic, what I call the God of self meology that we are seeing today that I think gets us both the toxic culture of self-love and the toxic empathy that we're talking about.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Yes, anywhere you watch or listen. Thank you.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Yes. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you very much.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Oh yeah, I think that's a really good way to frame it. I've often said that socialism is someone's way to try to be a good person without ever having to get off the couch because you're kind of just outsourcing your compassion to the state. And so you can just point to something that you have not done in order to show your virtue.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
And empathy is kind of similar in that it doesn't require any action. It doesn't require any sacrifice. All you have to do is say, I'm empathetic. And people conclude that you're therefore a good person. But you haven't actually had to do anything for someone to prove your virtue or to prove your selflessness. So in that way, it is kind of a virtue signal, but it's more than that.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Because if that's all it was, then okay, that's not a good trend. It's superficial. Maybe it's stopping people from actually getting up and sacrificing something for someone else. But I actually think that it's harmful because, as you said, it gives people cover not to just not be a great person, but to actually be a bad person and to justify supporting harmful policies and policies.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
We go through some specific instances of that in my book. Each chapter is dedicated to an issue or a policy that I actually think is pushed forward by what I call toxic empathy, but is actually very harmful, not only to the people that it's purporting to help, but the people on the other side of the moral equation.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Yes. Well, before I try to parse out the difference between empathy and toxic empathy, I also like to talk about the difference between empathy and love or empathy and compassion or even empathy and sympathy. So if not to get into the weeds of the etymology of the word empathy. But sympathy, you can feel for someone. But empathy actually means to be in someone's feelings.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
So to feel how someone feels, which I actually think and argue in my book, as you just said, that can be very powerful to mourn with someone who is mourning, to rejoice with someone who is rejoicing, to say to someone, you know, maybe I haven't been there, but I'm going to put myself in your shoes to try to see what you see happening.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
actually tell a pretty lighthearted story at the beginning of this book. I'm a mom of three and one day I was traveling by myself and I saw this mom struggling to get her luggage and her stroller and her toddler all to her seat. And I could see that she was on the brink of tears. And so because I'm a mom that has been there, I have been in her shoes. I have struggled in that way.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
I not only noticed her, but But I knew exactly what she needed because I had been in that situation and I knew what I needed. And so I was able to very easily help her and to alleviate a burden because I had felt how she felt that propelled me to really love and serve her in a way that I would want. to be loved and served. And so empathy can motivate us to doing something that is actually good.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
But I do argue that empathy in itself is not necessarily good. Empathy in itself is neither good nor bad. Empathy in itself is just neutral. Because if I feel how someone feels, say a man who identifies as the opposite sex, I can say, wow, it would be really hard to think that you're stuck in the wrong body if that's how someone feels.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
But in what I argue is that it has to stop there in that if it goes to the point to where I am obscuring reality, the reality of male and female, if it is going to the point where I am affirming a policy that violates the rights of women to private and protected spaces, then my empathy has become toxic.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
then it has motivated me to do something that I believe is actually harmful to that person because I'm affirming a lie. And lying is not the same thing as love. But also, it is propelling me to affirm a policy that is harmful to the people on the other side of the moral equation. And that, of course, is the girls and the women who are then forced to share these private, intimate spaces with men.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Yeah, you're absolutely right. I like what you said that ideology kind of adulterates empathy, but I argue that empathy has to be in submission to truth. I'm a Christian. And so I believe that absolute truth, moral truth is found in scripture, but it also has to be in submission to observable reality, biological truth, factual truth.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
For example, if my child comes to me and she tells me, mom, there's a monster in the corner of my room. I could empathetically say, wow, that must be really scary. But it would not be loving for me to affirm her fear, to say, yeah, you're right. That probably is a monster. Go back to bed.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
The loving thing to do is to go into her room to turn on the light and say, baby, that's just a pile of clothes. That's not a monster. But today, when it is unpopular to turn the lights on and to tell someone that the that they fear or the thing that they've constructed in their mind, the narrative that they are following isn't real.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
It's just the proverbial pile of clothes when it's more popular and it's considered more loving and more righteous and more empathetic to tell someone, yeah, you should be really scared of that monster or the delusion that you believe is absolutely true. people are really disincentivized to tell the truth because you get punished for it. You get blowback for it.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
You and I are used to getting criticism. Most people aren't. So when you can just say, well, I'm just being empathetic by affirming something that you don't know is true, for example, that a man can become a woman, well, most people are going to fall in line.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
Yeah. And gosh, that goes so deep into the differences of worldviews because there are different definitions of even harm. Like whenever I'm talking to a progressive or when I'm reading something from someone on the other side of the aisle, I really have to take the time to to ask about every word, but what do they mean by X? So what is meant by harm?
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
What they typically mean is that I am hurting this person's feelings. And this kind of goes in line with their ideology, which of course they believe that who we really are is what we feel on the inside. And that physical reality is kind of arbitrary. It's in submission to how we feel.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
That's how they land at the conclusion that someone's true identity and true self is not what they are on the outside, but how they feel on the inside. And of course, I don't believe that. I think science, biology, observable reality tells us a lot about what is really true and who we are. So when I say harm, that gender ideology harms someone, I'm not just talking about hurt feelings.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
I'm talking about the mutilation of someone's bodies. I'm talking about the harm that comes, I think, not just individually, but societally when you say that two plus two equals five. And of course, all the implications that this has for confused young people and on their ability to function sexually and all the stuff that we know about puberty blockers and cross-sex hormones and all of that.
Ask Dr. Drew
Allie Beth Stuckey: ‘Toxic Empathy’ Killed Laken Riley & Is Used To Bully Good People Into Supporting Harmful Progressive Ideas w/ Rep. Morgan Griffith – Ask Dr. Drew – Ep 427
So we have two different definitions of harm. Theirs, I think, is superficial and it comes to feelings. Mine, really, I would say is about the whole person. And I am willing to risk hurting someone's feelings if it stops them from going down a path that is truly harmful.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
There is a subset of people on the right who would say that women should not be fighting culture wars at all. They should not have any work that takes them outside of the home. That means that they're an undercover girl boss feminist that is leading everyone else into girl boss feminism. We're talking about words. We're not talking about physical prowess.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
When it comes to talking, that's actually something that women traditionally are pretty good at and something that is... that God can't equip women to do at particular times. So I'm not out there trying to wage any wars.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
I am trying to use to the best of my ability, one of the capabilities that God has given me and to steward that well, to say something that is true and hopefully to give him glory. And I think all women and men are called to do that in a variety of ways.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
Men and women have contributed to their same household economy through a variety of ways for a really long time. I think it's actually very new, this idea that in order to be a Proverbs 31 woman or a biblical mom, that that literally only means being in the kitchen. I think being in the kitchen is great. I love all of it.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
I love domestic things, but having the home and the family being the center of a family economy doesn't always just mean cleaning and cooking.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
The online trend of saying that in order to be a biblical woman, your life has to look like this specifically. It has to look like this aesthetic, this kind of homesteading, this many hours at home. These kinds of jobs are okay, but these kinds of jobs are not okay. The outlines that are not in scripture. I think that places a burden on women to reach a particular standard that Jesus did not set.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
But if you truly look at Jesus' interactions with Pharisees, the problem wasn't that they were too religious or that they were too holy, but it's that they did not understand the heart of God's law. They cared too much about the outward appearance in these arbitrary standards, some of which they had come up with themselves that were completely outside of Scripture,
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
And God wanted them to understand the heart behind his principles. A lot of what I see in this trad world is really only about the superficial and that's never gonna change someone's heart or life for the better.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
One of the chapters of my book, You're Not Enough, is you're not entitled to your dreams. And I was kind of raised believing some prosperity gospel things, that if I do this, if I pray for this, if I ask this in the right way, then God definitely will give me the kind of success that I want.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
And I still see that believed among a lot of people, that if I say this basic incantation, do X, Y, Z, then I will finally get the relationship and the job that I want. But none of those things are guaranteed. We are not entitled to the things that we desire. You may never have it all.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
You may have a lot and there are a lot of things that you can be grateful for and it's okay to want a lot of things as long as they're like righteous desires. But no, we're never guaranteed to have everything and that's okay.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
I will always say pursuing money for the sake of money, pursuing fame for the sake of fame, pursuing power for the sake of power is never going to end well. So decide what you are going to pursue. If you pursue godly things, like if you pursue the family and a stable marriage
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
It, those other things may get thrown in and that may be great, but I promise if you pursue money and you pursue power for the sake of those things, you will not also get the stable family thrown in. So it's just a matter of what you want to prioritize and pursue and let God take care of the material stuff.
The Brett Cooper Show
Can Women Have it All? | Episode 10
You don't have to sacrifice your morals and jump at the opportunity to get in a sexual relationship with a powerful rich man just because you want to be rich. And I'm not saying that was necessarily Ashley's motivations. I don't think we know that for sure. But I think she was trying to say...