Allie Ward

But over the years, he has come home with just a checkerboard of injuries.

Something's always hurting.

So we have a lot of kind of questionable remedies on hand.

But the one that works wonders is this thing called the 701 Pain Easing Plaster.

It's in this little yellow tin.

It has both English and Chinese writing on the outside.

And these are like sticky plasters that come in a roll.

It looks like brown fruit leather.

And it smells like menthol and camphor.

And if you look on the back, the first ingredient is ground beetles.

And I was like, what does that mean?

Dug in a little further and you will find it's an excellent euphemism for a wingless cockroach.

These are pain patches made of cockroaches.

And many, many times I have shared a bed with the minty ghosts of dead roaches.

I don't care if you're eating right now.

This is my truth.

Savannah Johnson, first time question asker and Mouse Paxton wanted to know, Mouse Paxton says, every time I eat bugles, I remember the time I once watched a Madagascar hissing cockroach give live birth for like 10 minutes at the science center while eating bugles.

Are they good parents?

I really thought maybe that bugles would look like their genitalia, but no, this person was just eating bugles.

Interestingly enough, I was eating bugles yesterday and I eat bugles about once every 10 years.