Ashleigh Freckleton

So the women like me who had the doubts were surrounded by women who had no doubts.

And so, again, you start to question yourself rather than the situation.

I was defaulting my trust to others because I didn't trust myself.

So I would trust the judgment of others.

Yeah, yeah.

I got there and I walk up the stairs and there's just these two girls cuddling on the couch and just hardcore graphic porn on the big screen TV.

I'm not sure whether that was one of the kind of compulsory watching videos or whether that was their choice because they just thought, let's watch it because it will be a nice thing to do to, you know, look at this woman's energy and her shamelessness.

There was a lot of talk about shamelessness.

Oh.

So it might have been a choice, but it also might have been part of the required watching.

So there was a long list of DVDs that we were required to watch as part of our training.

And a lot of them were porn.

Some of them were sort of these weird sexualized tantric movies.

One of them was a pretty awful scene of these Portuguese women in an empty swimming pool just all peeing in each other.

Yeah, sorry.

You know, I won't go into detail.

I won't be graphic about it, but it was just really graphic, really awful, uncomfortable watching.

And when I told people what I'd watched, I said, oh, yeah, I had to watch, you know, the one called Pissing Competition.

And they said, oh, yeah, this one is really challenging.

I was...