Ashleigh Freckleton

Yeah, it was.

And it was a relief to kind of have it out there because I've been holding on to something and it's really hard to feel seen and understood by people when you're carrying a secret.

You sort of go, well, you don't know what happened and you don't know...

why I am the way I am or why I think the way I think.

So it was a huge weight off my shoulders to eventually be able to talk about it.

And then it just started coming, you know, as I just word vomiting, I couldn't stop talking about it for a time.

And I think that was probably a process of catharsis and a processing for myself of what had happened.

I just talked and talked and talked about it to anyone who would listen until eventually that passed, thankfully.

But yeah, there was a time in my life when I couldn't really think about much else.

Yeah, yeah.

And I was also starting to experience a lot of symptoms of PTSD.

So I was trying to practice yoga and then all of a sudden I couldn't practice yoga anymore because I'd start keeling over and shaking and crying.

Because it's triggering now.

Now it's connected to that experience.

It's not anymore.

I practice yoga again now.

Good, yeah.

But for a time...

For a time it was triggering and so was meditating.

It was triggering as well because a lot of the meditative skills that I had learnt were associated with the school and I had to kind of throw the baby out with the bathwater because all of these beautiful tools and traditions and rituals that are actually really good for us became the same triggers for my trauma and my pain.