Calvin Corelli

It was amazing.

And at one moment we were lying in a hammock as one does in Mexico.

And I, for the first time in my life, I felt safe

and loved enough that I dared kind of look inside to some of that darkness that I felt was inside.

So I grew up living from my neck up, completely mental.

I was good at programming.

I was terrified of human beings.

I was terrified of my feelings.

I had no relationship with any feelings at all.

So this was a big deal for me.

I was like, God, I feel so loved and safe.

Let me just smidge it, open up a little bit.

I felt like it was so dark and dirty that if I let anybody see, they would immediately reject me.

But I opened up, felt amazing.

Now, for whatever reason, my girlfriend, the woman at the time, she wanted to spend a month working as a waitress at a fancy seafood restaurant in Denmark and where we both are from and lived.

And I wanted to go scuba diving with a friend all over Central America, so we did that.

So a month apart, came back home.

She had prepared this incredible meal for me, which, of course, she had all these, you know, amazing recipes from the seafood restaurant.

And I just remember how remarkable it was.

It was incredible.