Camille Qurban

Hello.

I'm Fairy Twinkle Toes.

At least I was.

I worked at the Fairies Wishing Wand on Unley Road for four years, so I've been to about 400 children's birthday parties.

LAUGHTER

The Fairies Wishing Wand was the name of the shop and it was run by a woman called Pauline.

She used to smoke like a train during the parties but then burn marshmallow incense to cover up all the tobacco stench.

I did all the parties either at the shop or he went out to their kid's house and if you did it at the shop then you had to do it in the enchanted forest.

It wasn't that impressive really.

There was like a big bunch of fallen gum tree leaves in the corner that Pauline had spray painted gold.

That was the enchanted tree.

It had some fairy lights in it but most of them were blown out.

I met Fairy Lavender, she trained me up.

Fairy Lavender wore like a skin-tight purple leotard, a big purple frou-frou skirt, like this purple head garland thing, and big wings and size nine silver jiffies.

I was horrified when I saw it, it was tisied and bowed and belled and I got given the exact same uniform but in pink.

I was on my way to the first party and I was in Fairy Lavender's car.

She was fanging a Hold'em barina up the freeway, giving me tips.

She was chugging down the last of her up-and-go, telling me what to do and what not to do and everything.

Whatever you do, just don't give them your wand, she said, because they'll hit you with it.

I looked down at the wand and it was just this spray-painted...