Caryn Seidman-Becker

And I understand that feeling.

I used to look at people who lost someone and be like, oh, that's so sad.

They lost someone.

And now my kids and I laugh.

That's us.

People look at us that way.

And we don't want to be victims.

We want to be change makers.

Two things.

It is the morning and night prayer that we do with our kids.

Mark led the way on that.

The best way to sort of ground ourselves in the morning and to help go to bed in the evening.

The other thing is Shabbat dinner, bringing people together on Fridays for Shabbat.

When I grew up, it wasn't that much fun.

It was like the four of us at a table.

We have lots of people and lots of fun and flowing wine and we do high lows and act of kindness.

So everyone goes around the table and talks about the best part of their week, the worst part of their week and something nice that they did.

Some people call it happy crappy.

That's been a great way to get our kids to talk, to share our own vulnerabilities with each other.

When my husband died, our friends all created a sign up and everyone hosted a Shabbat and it held my family up in a really hard time.