Christine McGuinness

Yeah and it has been since I was a child I was talking to my mum about this and she said you've always been a nightmare I'd take you to ten different shops and we'd end up back in the first one getting the first outfit because it's

I don't want to say I waste time because in my mind it's like I have to look into everything.

I have to try on every outfit.

I have to see how it all feels.

But I'll spend so much time doing that when really if I just clear my mind, take a minute and go, okay, I'm wasting time there.

Let's just put a white t-shirt on.

Anything else, I'll go with it and then I can carry on with my day.

Genuinely, it's been a bit of a rollercoaster.

I know that's very cliche, but I think instantly people think that you're going to be relieved and you're going to be like, oh, great, I've got all of these answers now.

I know that I'm like this because of me and now I can be me.

It's not that easy.

That's what we want and I think that's what

I tried to do but over the years there's been a lot of unpicking there's been a lot of unlearning yeah and learning new habits and ways of thinking and understanding a lot of things throughout my life why I am the way I am and now it's it's been five or six years since I got diagnosed and I'm definitely a lot more relaxed within myself I'll laugh about these these little things like this

With the white t-shirts, I can laugh about it instead of thinking, am I weird?

Am I odd?

Am I a collector?

Like, what is this?

And now I just know that there's certain things that I need to do to help my nervous system stay calm and for me to be able to regulate my mind and my emotions.

Yeah, I often think about this jumper.

It was for a photo shoot when I was younger.