Clare Stephens

But I also loved, Tig says later on, and it is a bit specific to the nature of her friendship breakdown, a line about people deserving a friend when they least deserve a friend.

That also goes for maybe times in people's lives where they've made horrible mistakes, where they've behaved badly, where they have said something stupid.

And what I found interesting about Tig's particular experience is the difference between when somebody has maybe exposed a character flaw or a difference of opinion and when that becomes a fundamental clash of values.

And I think that that is kind of underlying the conversation she's having more, whereas the reply-only friend is a bit more of the surface level.

Like the problem is whether there's a fundamental clash of values.

Yes, yes.

But I also think in terms of the reply only friend and what both of you are saying about those kind of

I don't know, different, more novel conversation starters.

I'm good at that.

Like I will see a piece of gossip or something going on on TikTok and I'm like, I know who to send this to.

And we'll have a chat about that and then we may not talk for six months.

So that's fine.

But with a reply only friend, I think friendship, like any relationship, is based on a dynamic.

So I think in some ways I've kind of paired up with friends who were the reach out friend.

Do you know what I mean?

And I was wondering, Amelia, because you tell a story on the subs episode that we won't get into because it's so juicy, it just needs its space there, about you being very assertive with a friend about a very big life decision.

Are you friends with people who are similarly assertive?

And it's like here's where I'm at ideologically.

Yeah, exactly.

And you go back and forth.