Dan Savage

All right, coming up on today's show in the free-for-all micro savage love cast, tons of your Qs, lots of my As, and joining me on the micro and the magnum, the great Esther Perel is in the house. She is the psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author of Mating in Captivity and State of Affairs. She hosts the hit podcast, Where Should We Begin?

And she's here to talk with me about a new online course she's launching this week to help couples get that spark back. Esther and I talked about a lot, the difference between sex and eroticism, infidelity, when relationships become police states, forgiveness, and whether some couples can get that spark back, and a lot more. A lot of my convo with Esther is on the micro.

And she's here to talk with me about a new online course she's launching this week to help couples get that spark back. Esther and I talked about a lot, the difference between sex and eroticism, infidelity, when relationships become police states, forgiveness, and whether some couples can get that spark back, and a lot more. A lot of my convo with Esther is on the micro.

You're going to get a lot of Esther on the micro this week, a lot of the guests. But to hear all of my conversation with Esther Perel, you're going to have to become one of my subs by subscribing today at savage.love. All right, let's get to that first call.

You're going to get a lot of Esther on the micro this week, a lot of the guests. But to hear all of my conversation with Esther Perel, you're going to have to become one of my subs by subscribing today at savage.love. All right, let's get to that first call.

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This episode of the Lovecast is brought to you by the good folks at Squarespace. They make it easy to build a beautiful website, blog, or online store. Head on over to squarespace.com slash savage for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use the offer code savage to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

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This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep, the makers of my mattress and your next mattress. Right now, Helix is offering 25% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners. Go to helixsleep.com slash savage. This is their best offer yet. It won't last long. Go get your new mattress. With Helix, better sleep starts now.

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This episode of the Savage Lovecast is brought to you by Dipsy. Dipsy is an app full of hundreds of short, sexy audio stories designed by women for women. Get an extended 30-day free trial when you go to dipsystories.com slash savage.

Everybody who heard your call, everyone who listened to your question wants me to say just one thing. Don't fuck this guy. Don't reward this bad actor with your pussy. Don't throw good pussy after bad dick. Yeah, you met up with him when you dumped him and confronted him. He seemed genuinely sorry.

Everybody who heard your call, everyone who listened to your question wants me to say just one thing. Don't fuck this guy. Don't reward this bad actor with your pussy. Don't throw good pussy after bad dick. Yeah, you met up with him when you dumped him and confronted him. He seemed genuinely sorry.

It's not actually that hard to seem sorry when you're not and to offer somebody a bullshit half-assed apology for the sexual assault. Many jurisdictions now, stealthing is sexual assault now. And he didn't even offer to Venmo you money for half of whatever the plan B cost. So I doubt he's sorry. And so, yeah, you should not fuck this guy ever again. You should not fuck this guy.

It's not actually that hard to seem sorry when you're not and to offer somebody a bullshit half-assed apology for the sexual assault. Many jurisdictions now, stealthing is sexual assault now. And he didn't even offer to Venmo you money for half of whatever the plan B cost. So I doubt he's sorry. And so, yeah, you should not fuck this guy ever again. You should not fuck this guy.

His bad acts should not be rewarded. But you should probably go ahead and fuck this guy. If I were you, I would probably fuck this guy so long as his assholery could be contained. Part of why you felt so violated when he did this first time is you were exploring the possibility of a relationship. And you were hoping this person whose dick was in you cared about you.

His bad acts should not be rewarded. But you should probably go ahead and fuck this guy. If I were you, I would probably fuck this guy so long as his assholery could be contained. Part of why you felt so violated when he did this first time is you were exploring the possibility of a relationship. And you were hoping this person whose dick was in you cared about you.

And by removing the condom, he telegraphed that he cares way more about his dick than you do. And he won't even take responsibility for the horrible thing he did with his dick by paying for half the plan B or all the plan B or arriving with plan B in his backpack or whatever. The dick must be amazing. The sex must be really good.

And by removing the condom, he telegraphed that he cares way more about his dick than you do. And he won't even take responsibility for the horrible thing he did with his dick by paying for half the plan B or all the plan B or arriving with plan B in his backpack or whatever. The dick must be amazing. The sex must be really good.

If you want to use someone who used you and you want to contain that or you feel like you can contain that, your feelings aren't going to get involved forever. I can certainly see doing that. I have certainly done that myself. You're going to make sure that condom stays on. Okay, you're going to need a stapler to make sure that condom stays on.