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Desi Lydic

๐Ÿ‘ค Speaker
5366 total appearances

Appearances Over Time

Podcast Appearances

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

It's a show about 19th century British society taking care of their little women. She's a Beth in the streets, but a Joe in the sheets. Thanks to Bridgerton, there haven't been this many female orgasms since, well, since everyone started watching Bridgerton. So that's the history on the female orgasm on screen. And who knows what the future holds?

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

But it is important because the way women are portrayed on screen holds a mirror up to how they're treated in real life. And as all women know, sometimes holding up a mirror to something is the only way to get a good look and figure out how it works. A lot of people think America's first female soldier was Demi Moore in G.I.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

But it is important because the way women are portrayed on screen holds a mirror up to how they're treated in real life. And as all women know, sometimes holding up a mirror to something is the only way to get a good look and figure out how it works. A lot of people think America's first female soldier was Demi Moore in G.I.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

Jane, which is not true, although she was the first Marine to strip her way through West Point. The truth is, there have been women fighting wars since the beginning of America. During the Revolutionary War, Deborah Sampson was the first known woman to enlist. And to do so, she had to pose as a man, which had its ups and downs. On the one hand, she had to put herself in grave danger.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

Jane, which is not true, although she was the first Marine to strip her way through West Point. The truth is, there have been women fighting wars since the beginning of America. During the Revolutionary War, Deborah Sampson was the first known woman to enlist. And to do so, she had to pose as a man, which had its ups and downs. On the one hand, she had to put herself in grave danger.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

On the other hand, she didn't have to wear a corset anymore, which, if you ask me, is worth risking your life for. And Samson didn't just fight in the war. She kicked ass. She led a raid that captured 15 men. That's right, a woman took down 15 men without the help of Ronan Farrow. In the Civil War, another woman named Melinda Blaylock also posed as a man to enlist.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

On the other hand, she didn't have to wear a corset anymore, which, if you ask me, is worth risking your life for. And Samson didn't just fight in the war. She kicked ass. She led a raid that captured 15 men. That's right, a woman took down 15 men without the help of Ronan Farrow. In the Civil War, another woman named Melinda Blaylock also posed as a man to enlist.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

It's weird that America doesn't know her story, because she fought for the Confederacy. You'd think there'd be statues of her all over. But Blaylock was secretly a Union sympathizer, trying to desert the Confederates and escape up North. But before she could, she was shot in the shoulder and discovered as a woman by an Army doctor.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

It's weird that America doesn't know her story, because she fought for the Confederacy. You'd think there'd be statues of her all over. But Blaylock was secretly a Union sympathizer, trying to desert the Confederates and escape up North. But before she could, she was shot in the shoulder and discovered as a woman by an Army doctor.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

That's a huge sacrifice, because as soon as your doctor realizes you're a woman, all your premiums go up. After Blalock was discharged for the crime of having a vagina, she escaped to Tennessee and joined up with the Union Army, helping it to win the Civil War, end slavery, and defeat racism in America once and for all. At least that's what my nephew's textbook says. He goes to school in Texas.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

That's a huge sacrifice, because as soon as your doctor realizes you're a woman, all your premiums go up. After Blalock was discharged for the crime of having a vagina, she escaped to Tennessee and joined up with the Union Army, helping it to win the Civil War, end slavery, and defeat racism in America once and for all. At least that's what my nephew's textbook says. He goes to school in Texas.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

By World War I, women didn't have to drag race their way into service. They were actually allowed to enlist. In 1918, Ofa Mae Johnson was the first woman to join the United States Marine Corps, along with 300 other women. And they came to be known as the Marinettes. Although, to their credit, Marine officials distanced themselves from that nickname.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

By World War I, women didn't have to drag race their way into service. They were actually allowed to enlist. In 1918, Ofa Mae Johnson was the first woman to join the United States Marine Corps, along with 300 other women. And they came to be known as the Marinettes. Although, to their credit, Marine officials distanced themselves from that nickname.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

Probably because Marinette sounds less like soldiers and more like a dance troupe that does high kicks on the battlefield, which is really just giving the enemy unrealistic expectations of what their legs should look like. By World War II, women weren't just fighting on the ground. They were taking to the skies. America had a shortage of pilots, so women were trained to fly military aircrafts.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

Probably because Marinette sounds less like soldiers and more like a dance troupe that does high kicks on the battlefield, which is really just giving the enemy unrealistic expectations of what their legs should look like. By World War II, women weren't just fighting on the ground. They were taking to the skies. America had a shortage of pilots, so women were trained to fly military aircrafts.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

These women were known as WASPs, which stood for Women Air Force Service Pilots, and not, as many believe, Wet Ass Service Pilots. This was just another example of women getting to step up during the war to do jobs previously reserved for men. Flying planes, playing baseball, women even had to fill in for mansplainers. See, the reason they call it World War II is because it's a second one.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

These women were known as WASPs, which stood for Women Air Force Service Pilots, and not, as many believe, Wet Ass Service Pilots. This was just another example of women getting to step up during the war to do jobs previously reserved for men. Flying planes, playing baseball, women even had to fill in for mansplainers. See, the reason they call it World War II is because it's a second one.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

It's a math thing, you wouldn't understand. I gotta go hammer some shit. World War II saw another first for women when Charity Adams Early became the first African-American female army officer and led the first battalion of black women to be stationed overseas, which means without her inspiration, we never would have had Beyonce's Super Bowl halftime show.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

It's a math thing, you wouldn't understand. I gotta go hammer some shit. World War II saw another first for women when Charity Adams Early became the first African-American female army officer and led the first battalion of black women to be stationed overseas, which means without her inspiration, we never would have had Beyonce's Super Bowl halftime show.

The Daily Show: Ears Edition
TDS Time Machine | Best of Hist-HER-y

Early was given the daunting task of delivering airplane hangers full of undelivered mail to the soldiers fighting in Europe. And she did such an amazing job that she was eventually promoted to Lieutenant Colonel, which back then was the highest rank a woman was allowed to have, just above HBIC and Girl Boss.