Desi Lydic

Are you having tantric sex with them?

Look, California, I know you want to make sure everyone gets a chance to vote, but the longer you take with the ballots, the more you open up the door to mistrust in the process.

That being said, Republicans, you guys can't just go around screaming something is rigged every time you lose.

It's embarrassing.

Take the L with dignity and pride and honor, which is something that Game 3 referee Mark David knows nothing about.

Diabolical, diabolical.

For more on the mayor's race in Los Angeles, we turn to our very own Troy Iwata.

Troy, can you give us some insight into why this count is taking so long?

Whoa, Desi, slow down.

Okay, I just woke up.

You're talking so fast.

OK, well, wake up.

You're at work.

Get it together.

What's up is we need to know why this ballot count is taking so long.

It's raising suspicions about voter fraud.

It's more laid back.

Well, get it done, dude.

Okay, we need some details into why the count has dragged on.

Oh my God, you're being so loud.