Diego Perez

It's just my fault.

I didn't sleep that many hours last night.

I didn't take good care of my body because I was eating too much food the night before.

And I woke up not feeling well.

There's a few things to understand.

I mean, one, our understanding of the changing nature of emotions has really helped us not...

like fully identify with what's happening so when we talk about you know i feel angry or i feel sad or i feel something we don't really even use those words anymore now when we talk between my wife and i you know i let her know like oh a lot of heaviness is moving through me and sometimes it doesn't even have a name or a lot of sadness is moving through me or i feel you know something moving through as opposed to saying i am this so one is understanding that

okay, anger has arisen, but it's not something that like you're always angry or you're always going to be X, Y, and Z. So one is contextually understanding that this thing is passing through you.

It isn't you.

And then the other aspect of it is just slow down.

Literally being able to slow down

and feel what's happening as opposed to just fueling it and letting it take over your actions is incredibly helpful because then you can honor the reality of the moment, like honor what you're feeling, but then figure out, okay, am I going to sort of follow through on this?

Do I need to speak about it?

What do I need to do to address the situation?

And just give yourself a little bit of time to act skillfully as opposed to just reactively.

i am scared i am pissed whatever to there is anger or there is fear it's arisen then you take the eye out of it right because we're just like we're so prone towards attachment and clinging that whatever we see whatever we feel very strongly we want to just grab it we want to grab it and we want to be it and you know i've noticed from meditating that emotions have this interesting

quality where they try to expand themselves, whether it's if you're feeling joy, if you're feeling happiness, you want to share that with others, you want to let your peace permeate.

And the same thing when you're feeling angry, when you're feeling heavy, when you're feeling anxious, that permeates outward and sometimes it may even become an invitation for someone to join you in your anger.

Like, you know, either you say something that makes them upset or you explain to them why you're upset and you want them to also be angry on your behalf against another person.

And I think it's quite difficult to just, you know, you want to feel your emotions.