Dr. Alok Kanojia

Now, this is really important to understand because should in the brain does not lead to motivation. So generally speaking, if we look at the concept of should, where does it come from in the brain? It comes from our social emotional circuitry. So if we look at should, when I do things that I should do, what I avoid is a feeling of shame. What I avoid is a feeling of guilt.

Now, this is really important to understand because should in the brain does not lead to motivation. So generally speaking, if we look at the concept of should, where does it come from in the brain? It comes from our social emotional circuitry. So if we look at should, when I do things that I should do, what I avoid is a feeling of shame. What I avoid is a feeling of guilt.

Now, this is really important to understand because should in the brain does not lead to motivation. So generally speaking, if we look at the concept of should, where does it come from in the brain? It comes from our social emotional circuitry. So if we look at should, when I do things that I should do, what I avoid is a feeling of shame. What I avoid is a feeling of guilt.

What I gain is a feeling of pride, potentially, right? When I do what I should do. The driver for shoulds is our relationship to like other human beings, which is why if there's something you should do in life and no one is watching, you'll never do it. Because literally should comes from where does should come from?

What I gain is a feeling of pride, potentially, right? When I do what I should do. The driver for shoulds is our relationship to like other human beings, which is why if there's something you should do in life and no one is watching, you'll never do it. Because literally should comes from where does should come from?

What I gain is a feeling of pride, potentially, right? When I do what I should do. The driver for shoulds is our relationship to like other human beings, which is why if there's something you should do in life and no one is watching, you'll never do it. Because literally should comes from where does should come from?

Should is a societal expectation, which even if you believe you should do things, where did you learn that you should do things from other people? So should is fundamentally a social construct and involves the social circuits of the brain. Which is why like when someone's watching us, oh, where do you want to eat? Now I'm going to order a salad when I go out with my friends.

Should is a societal expectation, which even if you believe you should do things, where did you learn that you should do things from other people? So should is fundamentally a social construct and involves the social circuits of the brain. Which is why like when someone's watching us, oh, where do you want to eat? Now I'm going to order a salad when I go out with my friends.

Should is a societal expectation, which even if you believe you should do things, where did you learn that you should do things from other people? So should is fundamentally a social construct and involves the social circuits of the brain. Which is why like when someone's watching us, oh, where do you want to eat? Now I'm going to order a salad when I go out with my friends.

But like when I'm going by myself, it's going to be fried chicken and French fries. I feel seen. Yes. So should is never going to work. I feel attacked, actually. Unfortunately, right? If only we could be seen all the time. Exactly. Man, I'm glad I'm not alone. So want comes from the nucleus accumbens. Want or desire comes from craving and behavioral reinforcement and the seeking of pleasure.

But like when I'm going by myself, it's going to be fried chicken and French fries. I feel seen. Yes. So should is never going to work. I feel attacked, actually. Unfortunately, right? If only we could be seen all the time. Exactly. Man, I'm glad I'm not alone. So want comes from the nucleus accumbens. Want or desire comes from craving and behavioral reinforcement and the seeking of pleasure.

But like when I'm going by myself, it's going to be fried chicken and French fries. I feel seen. Yes. So should is never going to work. I feel attacked, actually. Unfortunately, right? If only we could be seen all the time. Exactly. Man, I'm glad I'm not alone. So want comes from the nucleus accumbens. Want or desire comes from craving and behavioral reinforcement and the seeking of pleasure.

So these two things are fighting. And if you are fighting in shoulds versus wants, the only way the shoulds will win is if someone is watching, which is why as people become more isolated, their lives have gotten worse because so few people are watching now that we get away with it. You used to not get away with it because someone was paying attention.

So these two things are fighting. And if you are fighting in shoulds versus wants, the only way the shoulds will win is if someone is watching, which is why as people become more isolated, their lives have gotten worse because so few people are watching now that we get away with it. You used to not get away with it because someone was paying attention.

So these two things are fighting. And if you are fighting in shoulds versus wants, the only way the shoulds will win is if someone is watching, which is why as people become more isolated, their lives have gotten worse because so few people are watching now that we get away with it. You used to not get away with it because someone was paying attention.

That's the first thing to understand. Wants and shoulds are like fundamentally different. They can compete, but we need social environment to make them really work. So then the second question is like, OK, if you don't really want to do it, you should do it, but you don't want to do it. That doesn't activate our behavior in the right way because there's a should moving in one direction.

That's the first thing to understand. Wants and shoulds are like fundamentally different. They can compete, but we need social environment to make them really work. So then the second question is like, OK, if you don't really want to do it, you should do it, but you don't want to do it. That doesn't activate our behavior in the right way because there's a should moving in one direction.

That's the first thing to understand. Wants and shoulds are like fundamentally different. They can compete, but we need social environment to make them really work. So then the second question is like, OK, if you don't really want to do it, you should do it, but you don't want to do it. That doesn't activate our behavior in the right way because there's a should moving in one direction.

There's a want moving in the other direction. So if we want to motivate behavior, right, motivation comes from the nucleus accumbens. We have to have a motivation to do something. But oftentimes it's really interesting. So if you move one level back, do you wish you were someone else? Now, that's something you're motivated towards.

There's a want moving in the other direction. So if we want to motivate behavior, right, motivation comes from the nucleus accumbens. We have to have a motivation to do something. But oftentimes it's really interesting. So if you move one level back, do you wish you were someone else? Now, that's something you're motivated towards.