Dr. Alok Kanojia

There'll be particular times where if I'm a little bit, like if I like treat you in the wrong way, like you'll notice that you feel like that kid again. When you're idle, you feel like that kid again. So that psychological, that neuronal wiring is there, right? So you can build all this wonderful stuff and there's authenticity. It's not like you're faking it.

There'll be particular times where if I'm a little bit, like if I like treat you in the wrong way, like you'll notice that you feel like that kid again. When you're idle, you feel like that kid again. So that psychological, that neuronal wiring is there, right? So you can build all this wonderful stuff and there's authenticity. It's not like you're faking it.

This is a really common misconception that are you faking? No, you're genuinely confident. You're genuinely authentic. You can't fake it and get to where you are. And at the same time, the wounds that we experience leave scars. Yeah, 100%. And the real way to heal is to go back to that moment and like deal with that kid, right?

This is a really common misconception that are you faking? No, you're genuinely confident. You're genuinely authentic. You can't fake it and get to where you are. And at the same time, the wounds that we experience leave scars. Yeah, 100%. And the real way to heal is to go back to that moment and like deal with that kid, right?

You have to dismantle the worldview that you have, which is how you heal trauma. Is when we get traumatized, we adapt. In order to come out of this situation, I need to learn this particular thing. So some kids that I've worked with adapt by becoming invisible. That's what I did. I got bullied a lot. So what do I do? I learn how to be invisible. Some people adapt by being successful.

You have to dismantle the worldview that you have, which is how you heal trauma. Is when we get traumatized, we adapt. In order to come out of this situation, I need to learn this particular thing. So some kids that I've worked with adapt by becoming invisible. That's what I did. I got bullied a lot. So what do I do? I learn how to be invisible. Some people adapt by being successful.

So if I'm successful, it's an antidote to my shame. I don't have to be ashamed anymore if I'm successful. But that old injury is still there.

So if I'm successful, it's an antidote to my shame. I don't have to be ashamed anymore if I'm successful. But that old injury is still there.

Exactly. Yeah. Right? So let's understand a couple things. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, Stephen, beautiful. So a couple of things to understand. We think about healing as a – is one spectrum, right? So if I'm at negative 100, I can't also be a positive 100. Those two things cancel out. That's not how it works.

Exactly. Yeah. Right? So let's understand a couple things. Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, Stephen, beautiful. So a couple of things to understand. We think about healing as a – is one spectrum, right? So if I'm at negative 100, I can't also be a positive 100. Those two things cancel out. That's not how it works.

So if I give you a glass of water, and then I piss in it, and then I add sugar, it doesn't remove the piss. These are both independent things. This is what tends to happen. This is what we don't understand about trauma. Removing the piss requires removing the piss. No amount of sugar will take it out of the drink.

So if I give you a glass of water, and then I piss in it, and then I add sugar, it doesn't remove the piss. These are both independent things. This is what tends to happen. This is what we don't understand about trauma. Removing the piss requires removing the piss. No amount of sugar will take it out of the drink.

So no amount of, this is mistake number one, no amount of building something good will remove something bad. Okay. So healing, and it's also like, you know, if I break a leg, no amount of bench press will heal my leg. Like I can build as much as I want to. I can fix my hair. I can brush my teeth, but the leg is broken. The leg is broken. Same is true of the mind. Okay. Second thing,

So no amount of, this is mistake number one, no amount of building something good will remove something bad. Okay. So healing, and it's also like, you know, if I break a leg, no amount of bench press will heal my leg. Like I can build as much as I want to. I can fix my hair. I can brush my teeth, but the leg is broken. The leg is broken. Same is true of the mind. Okay. Second thing,

is what happens is we have like our consciousness is divided. Now we're gonna get kind of technical and off the rails. So we have all of these like dormant pieces of our consciousness that activate in certain situations. And all you have to do is pay attention to yourself in a five minute period and you'll see this. So when I walk into a bathroom that I've never used before,

is what happens is we have like our consciousness is divided. Now we're gonna get kind of technical and off the rails. So we have all of these like dormant pieces of our consciousness that activate in certain situations. And all you have to do is pay attention to yourself in a five minute period and you'll see this. So when I walk into a bathroom that I've never used before,

Then I start thinking about, okay, where's the flush? Where's the toilet? How do I use this toilet? You know, so like I'll activate dormant information all the time. So if someone asks me what's, you know, the quadratic equation, that information is there and dormant in my mind and it gets activated.

Then I start thinking about, okay, where's the flush? Where's the toilet? How do I use this toilet? You know, so like I'll activate dormant information all the time. So if someone asks me what's, you know, the quadratic equation, that information is there and dormant in my mind and it gets activated.

Right? So the injury just goes dormant. Then there are certain things that happen that can trigger that injury. That's what we call triggers, right? So if I'm traumatized, if we look at like PTSD, and I've been traumatized by, you know, a bomb going off, Literally, my brain has certain circuits that scans my perceptual environment and decides what to activate.

Right? So the injury just goes dormant. Then there are certain things that happen that can trigger that injury. That's what we call triggers, right? So if I'm traumatized, if we look at like PTSD, and I've been traumatized by, you know, a bomb going off, Literally, my brain has certain circuits that scans my perceptual environment and decides what to activate.