Dr. Anna Lembke

But we've managed to make them addictive in all these different ways. I still think it's a better way to get your dopamine. Like I really encourage exercise. We always talk about movement as medicine. And in general, our life is so convenient, so easy, so passive, so sedentary that I'm telling patients all the time, you know, get up off the couch, move your body, walk around the block.

I think that's the bigger obstacle right now is just getting people to move. But I do think we need to be wary of not going too far in the direction of like the ultra, ultra, ultra, whatever it is.

I think that's the bigger obstacle right now is just getting people to move. But I do think we need to be wary of not going too far in the direction of like the ultra, ultra, ultra, whatever it is.

I think that part of the problem is that we've organized our lives now around rewards. Almost everything that we do is predicated on the feel-good moment we'll have at the end of it. And because of that, we are missing out on the process. We're projecting our psyche forward into the future toward the reward and not able to really be here in the moment. Okay, this is going to sound weird.

I think that part of the problem is that we've organized our lives now around rewards. Almost everything that we do is predicated on the feel-good moment we'll have at the end of it. And because of that, we are missing out on the process. We're projecting our psyche forward into the future toward the reward and not able to really be here in the moment. Okay, this is going to sound weird.

I'm going to give you a weird example. So driving over here today, I found I was nervous for this interview and in a way looking forward to it, but in a way wanting it to be over. Right? And in seeing that in myself, I thought that's so sad.

I'm going to give you a weird example. So driving over here today, I found I was nervous for this interview and in a way looking forward to it, but in a way wanting it to be over. Right? And in seeing that in myself, I thought that's so sad.

Like that's so sad that we live our lives that way, myself included, always this weird blend of wanting whatever we're doing to be over so that in a way we can just go hide and do whatever that self-stim thing is that we do where we're safe and we're like, you know, stimulating ourselves in some way. And then I thought, well, what if I knew that I was going to die right after this?

Like that's so sad that we live our lives that way, myself included, always this weird blend of wanting whatever we're doing to be over so that in a way we can just go hide and do whatever that self-stim thing is that we do where we're safe and we're like, you know, stimulating ourselves in some way. And then I thought, well, what if I knew that I was going to die right after this?

I've been off really weird now. But what if I knew that I was actually going to die right after our conversation today? That totally changes my perspective, doesn't it? Because this time you and I have it. That's all I got. It's over for me. So this conversation is it. I really better be right here right now and really taking joy in whatever you and I can find together.

I've been off really weird now. But what if I knew that I was actually going to die right after our conversation today? That totally changes my perspective, doesn't it? Because this time you and I have it. That's all I got. It's over for me. So this conversation is it. I really better be right here right now and really taking joy in whatever you and I can find together.

And I think the more we can do that, the better.

And I think the more we can do that, the better.

It's a great question. And I've actually given this quite a lot of thought because I remember when I was in college and I, you know, met some like Zen people and they were like, be here now, be here now. And I thought, well, whenever I'm here now, I'm miserable. Like I don't like me and I don't like being in the world. I don't want to be here now. I want to be somewhere else.

It's a great question. And I've actually given this quite a lot of thought because I remember when I was in college and I, you know, met some like Zen people and they were like, be here now, be here now. And I thought, well, whenever I'm here now, I'm miserable. Like I don't like me and I don't like being in the world. I don't want to be here now. I want to be somewhere else.

So I didn't really understand what they were getting at. It really took me until I had lived quite a lot of life and had some significant experiences and given it some thought that I realized, oh, be here now means be here now and be uncomfortable. And be okay with being uncomfortable. And being okay with not being able to control my pleasure or my pain or my comfort level.

So I didn't really understand what they were getting at. It really took me until I had lived quite a lot of life and had some significant experiences and given it some thought that I realized, oh, be here now means be here now and be uncomfortable. And be okay with being uncomfortable. And being okay with not being able to control my pleasure or my pain or my comfort level.

But just being open to whatever comes. And I think that's really a key shift. That... I'm not trying to control my experience in the moment and that it's okay to be unhappy or restless or uncomfortable and not trying to run away from that but just really turn and face it and embrace the discomfort, which I also think is quite universal. I don't think I'm alone in that.

But just being open to whatever comes. And I think that's really a key shift. That... I'm not trying to control my experience in the moment and that it's okay to be unhappy or restless or uncomfortable and not trying to run away from that but just really turn and face it and embrace the discomfort, which I also think is quite universal. I don't think I'm alone in that.

And then the key piece about not anticipating the reward is – Helps me be in the moment, right, because I'm not just waiting for the good thing to come after. I'm saying to myself, imagine there's nothing good coming after, nothing at all, right? There's just, there aren't rewards. This is it. And then also being able to say, and it's okay if in the moment, like, it's not great.