Dr. Ciara Kelly

It is a tool of control.

And women are shamed all the time, particularly for their sexuality.

I don't mean being gay.

I mean for actually being sexual creatures.

Having lusts and quickenings.

All of that.

But shame is one of the tools that society uses, that hegemony uses, but that we also internalize.

There's something in shame because we shame each other and ourselves about all sorts of things and it controls how we behave.

It's disgusting.

It's corrosive.

Shame and guilt.

It's funny, I always find guilt a bit useless.

After the fact.

I think you can recognize what you've done and say sorry and do all of those things which are corrective.

But I don't know about guilt.

I do think a helpful thing for people to do if they are carrying this...

is look around you, look around the world and look around at all the gay people you know who are out and no one is hating on them, no one is insulting them, no one is thinking less of them and they're just living their lives happily.

And you could do that too.

Because like, there's gay people everywhere you look.

Do you know what I mean?