Dr. Ellen Langer

You know, which means this bad has to be bad.

And now we need to have some fun in our lives so we can tolerate all of these necessary bad things.

And I think that that is totally mindless, that we shouldn't seek work-life balance.

because that says the bad has to be bad, but rather we should have work-life integration, that no matter what we're doing, there's a way of doing it that can be interesting, if not simply fun, no matter what.

And people are taught to accept it, and then they say, okay, well, I can tolerate it, rather than no, there's a better than better way of dealing with things.

Well, people also don't realize they think in some way that they want to be completely successful.

And so sort of an example I often use, you're a little kid and you're in the elevator and you can't reach the button and you're very excited, but you just can't do it.

And a parent picks you or whoever's with you, an adult picks you up and you press the button.

Then you're a little taller and you're trying to, and eventually though, you're able to hit that button.

And that's when the activity is over for you.

When was the last time you got in an elevator and were excited that you hit the button?

Or, you know, you're playing golf and I wish I could just, you know, swing this better and get a, and so eventually you get, nobody has done this, but imagine that now you get a hole in one every single time you swing the club.

There's no game there.

So, you know, and there's something I think I might be the only one who I don't know where I learned this, but I learned it was called the Texas curse, which is I wish you what you wish for yourself and that the things we wish for, we shouldn't wish for.

You don't want everything to be so easy.

You know, I was doing this TV show 40 years ago and.

on my nursing home study.

And I kept telling him, here's the way I would open it up.

Nobody ever listens to me.

I still think it's a good idea, which was, you know, you ask somebody, wouldn't it be wonderful if somebody, all of your meals were taken care of and you didn't have to clean the house.