Dr. Ethan Kross
speaker
968 appearances
6 recordings
6 series
first heard Nov 2024
last heard May 2025
Dr. Ethan Kross’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
So great job. Okay.
Hey, I'm happy to give them. But it's true. And the reason why we do the outcome next, now you've articulated your goal. We want to energize you. Like this is a goal worth pursuing. This is worth my time. So now you're in this energized state for pursuing this goal. Now we get to the second O, which are the obstacles. Okay. The personal obstacles that are going to stand in the way
of you achieving this goal. So what might be an obstacle that might prevent you from turning the volume on your chatter down?
Yeah. So you mean turn the volume down?
Yeah. So you've just gone through your obstacles. So what we would then do, we would focus on one of those obstacles to start and we get to a P, which is our plan.
But it's not any kind of plan. It's what we call... an implementation intention. It's easier to call it a plan. It's basically an if-then plan. So if I find myself doom casting and becoming this savant in negative self-talk, then, and you plug in what you are going to do. You plug in the tools that you're going to use in that situation.
So if I find myself berating myself incessantly, then I'm going to coach myself using distance self-talk.
Go for a walk in nature.
Jump into the mental time travel machine. Go forward and back. We'll talk about that in a little bit.
Let's talk about it right now.
Mental time travel, these are two of the most useful tools that I possess along with distance self-talk. Super simple.
We talk a lot about the importance of being in the moment, grounding ourselves in our breath. That is useful. But what we forget when we talk about being in the moment is number one- Our minds evolved to travel in time. And you can actually use that to your benefit. So number one, how am I going to feel about this issue next week, next month, next year? Most of our emotions follow a time course.
They get triggered, and as time goes on, they eventually subside. Most of our emotional experiences follow that trajectory. But when we are stuck in chatter, we just zoom in on the awfulness. It feels like it's never going to end. When you jump into the time travel machine, how am I going to feel about this 10 years from now, 20 years from now?
It highlights the fact that what you're going through, as bad as it is, it's not permanent. Things will eventually get better. It gives you hope. And that turns the volume on or chatter down. That's one thing. That's mental time travel to the future.
That's powerful for me.
You got it. So you're blending these tools, which is also how these things actually operate in daily life, right? So we go back to the one thing. It's not one. Now we're doing two.
That's right. So you can customize the tools based again on who you are and the circumstances you're in. So let's close the loop though on mental time travel because we just talked about going into the future. You could also go into the past. Works a little bit differently. For me, this is my, is ace in the hole the right term? I think it is.
It's like my secret superpower.
I think I might've gotten wrong, but that's okay. So- We'll give it to you. Yeah. Now you're giving me the aphorisms. This is reciprocal. It goes very well. So the story I open up my second book with, Shift, is a story of my grandmother in World War II, surviving the Nazis, basically slaughtering her whole family. My grandmother's my ace in the hole. When things feel so big-
And just kind of how am I possibly going to get through this? I jump into the mental time travel machine. I go back to 1940 whatever. I spent just a little bit of time with my grandmother in my mind. And what that does for me is it zooms me out. It makes it super clear to me that what I'm going through, as difficult as it is, it pales in comparison to what she went through and survived.
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