Dr. Jordan B. Peterson

In the first few months of life a child has to be in very close contact with his or her mother. It's virtually impossible to give a true infant too much attention. In fact, I don't even know if it is possible. As the child becomes autonomous, can start doing things on his or her own, then you have to pull back in lockstep with the child's independence.

And you might say, well, how do you know how fast to pull back? You really take your cues from the child. A mother or a parent acts as a zone of security and predictability and care for the child. And so the child uses the mother, let's say, as a place of safety and will come back for comfort, for attention, and then will go out into the world and play and interact until they hit an obstacle.

And you might say, well, how do you know how fast to pull back? You really take your cues from the child. A mother or a parent acts as a zone of security and predictability and care for the child. And so the child uses the mother, let's say, as a place of safety and will come back for comfort, for attention, and then will go out into the world and play and interact until they hit an obstacle.

And you might say, well, how do you know how fast to pull back? You really take your cues from the child. A mother or a parent acts as a zone of security and predictability and care for the child. And so the child uses the mother, let's say, as a place of safety and will come back for comfort, for attention, and then will go out into the world and play and interact until they hit an obstacle.

And then they'll retreat to the mother. to be that island of stability, security and encouragement. And so then there's a continual dance between outward movement and retreat that the mother anchors. And eventually the child is capable of completely autonomous life. And then if you've handled that properly and you've been the proper balance of security and encouragement,

And then they'll retreat to the mother. to be that island of stability, security and encouragement. And so then there's a continual dance between outward movement and retreat that the mother anchors. And eventually the child is capable of completely autonomous life. And then if you've handled that properly and you've been the proper balance of security and encouragement,

And then they'll retreat to the mother. to be that island of stability, security and encouragement. And so then there's a continual dance between outward movement and retreat that the mother anchors. And eventually the child is capable of completely autonomous life. And then if you've handled that properly and you've been the proper balance of security and encouragement,

The child won't leave permanently because you'll establish an adult relationship with them and then a relationship with their children. And then you get to have your cake and eat it too. And that's a good deal for everybody. If you're willing to lose your child as they adventure outward, you'll gain them back in an adult relationship.

The child won't leave permanently because you'll establish an adult relationship with them and then a relationship with their children. And then you get to have your cake and eat it too. And that's a good deal for everybody. If you're willing to lose your child as they adventure outward, you'll gain them back in an adult relationship.

The child won't leave permanently because you'll establish an adult relationship with them and then a relationship with their children. And then you get to have your cake and eat it too. And that's a good deal for everybody. If you're willing to lose your child as they adventure outward, you'll gain them back in an adult relationship.

How did you overindulge, do you think, exactly?

How did you overindulge, do you think, exactly?

How did you overindulge, do you think, exactly?

I've seen mothers who are at the beck and call of their three-year-old son in particular. That's a bad idea. Your son, your daughter for that matter, isn't little god emperor of the universe and shouldn't conceptualize himself or herself that way. That's a good pathway to narcissism. Your best pathway forward as a mother is to not do for your child anything that your child can do for themself.

I've seen mothers who are at the beck and call of their three-year-old son in particular. That's a bad idea. Your son, your daughter for that matter, isn't little god emperor of the universe and shouldn't conceptualize himself or herself that way. That's a good pathway to narcissism. Your best pathway forward as a mother is to not do for your child anything that your child can do for themself.

I've seen mothers who are at the beck and call of their three-year-old son in particular. That's a bad idea. Your son, your daughter for that matter, isn't little god emperor of the universe and shouldn't conceptualize himself or herself that way. That's a good pathway to narcissism. Your best pathway forward as a mother is to not do for your child anything that your child can do for themself.

That means doing up their shoes or putting on their clothes and cleaning up their rooms and helping to set the table when they're old enough to help set the table. One of the mistakes that parents make is they'll step in and do things quickly for the child instead of letting them learn.

That means doing up their shoes or putting on their clothes and cleaning up their rooms and helping to set the table when they're old enough to help set the table. One of the mistakes that parents make is they'll step in and do things quickly for the child instead of letting them learn.

That means doing up their shoes or putting on their clothes and cleaning up their rooms and helping to set the table when they're old enough to help set the table. One of the mistakes that parents make is they'll step in and do things quickly for the child instead of letting them learn.

Now, at any given time, it's faster for you to dress your child, but you don't want to be dressing them when they're seven. Everything you can do to bring the child into the realm of adult responsibility is exactly the sort of thing that you would do if you were reasonable and you were trying to boost what people now so casually call self-esteem.