Dr. Kate Truitt
speaker
65 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Apr 2025
last heard Apr 2025
Dr. Kate Truitt’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
mind-body system wasn't in control in those moments. And so the label of victim and of itself becomes self-identifying. And either side of the aisle, I don't believe it's supportive or helpful for my clients or anybody in the world to have an I am statement in one direction or the other. When we look at the term of victim, it means something has happened that was really bad. And it's a concept.
It's not a label. It's not a self-identification.
In the field of survivalship, when working with trauma survivors, we've taken victim off the table. Because when we're a survivor, it's giving an acknowledgement to that something did happen. So yes, there was a moment where I was a victim of something really bad happening. And I'm standing here right now. I made it through. I have survived.
And therefore, there's space to look at what happened and to build through survivalship into resilience and empowerment.
Ah, shame. Shame, shame, shame. Our brain can be a shame junkie. And shame is fundamentally a feeling of being flooded with a lack of self-worth, feeling completely and utterly like somebody is bad. They are broken at their core and they are bad. And the interesting thing about shame is our little friend Amy the amygdala loves it.
Because when she's feeling shame, she's like, there is something clearly not okay here. And she gets to make up even more stories about how we are bad, believing that she's keeping us safe. She really does have her best interests at heart. But feeling shame or feeling bad or broken for Amy the amygdala actually gives her power. It helps her feel like she has agency and choice.
I know it's weird, and it's real.
The problem is hindsight's 20-20. And so we can look back and see every flag that was missed And hold ourselves accountable for it. And when I say hold ourselves accountable for it, of course, it's not us. It's our little friend, Amy, the amygdala spinning up a narrative of saying, see, you missed that. That's your fault. That's your fault. That's your fault. That's your fault.
You missed that, too. Aren't you so bad? How did you fail on that account? What's wrong with you? So on and so forth. Again, all as a way to create internally a sense of safety. Because when we're so flagellating, when we're beating ourselves up and holding ourselves responsible for things that we could not control, did not know about, did not see, our amygdala is saying, remember it.
Remember it because you don't want this to happen again. And so this is her way of being a looky-loo when there's a car accident on the freeway. People slow down, yes, perhaps for the safety of the passengers in the car accident, but also people look because the brain's going, I need to learn something over there.
Our amygdala's version of doing that with shame and trauma is to do a hindsight review and have 20-20 vision about every single thing we missed and hold us accountable for it so we don't get into danger in the future.
One of the interesting things that happens with my clients when we, not everybody, but a lot of them when we begin the work is ask them, what is their goal? And they say, I just want to be happy. The problem is, is our brain is not designed to be happy all the time. In fact, our brain would burn out neurochemically if we were
Our brain and our body are designed to flow and ebb and navigate through all types of feelings and emotions on a daily basis. The good, the bad, the beautiful, the ugly, the calm and the neutral. And all of those feelings become flags for helping us better understand what's happening in the world around us.
The beautiful part of being in the work and doing the work is that those red flag moments no longer spiral us into shame. If shame comes up and go, oh, that's also an interesting data point. Why is a part of me now feeling bad again? What's happening? And we can get curious.
Or in the aftermath of a red flag moment, if we've really leaned into neuroplasticity and helped our system come home to self with loving care, we can give ourselves an internal hug or even an external hug, you know, wrap our arms around ourselves and go, there, there, girl. It's okay. What's going on?
And have that compassionate loving response that for so many of us, we may never have ever had to begin with.
Self-compassion is a skill. We're not born to be compassionate towards ourselves. We are born to be compassionate towards other beings, animals, living things, even inanimate objects, because we need other entities for survival. But frankly, to survive, we don't have to be nice to ourselves. So that's a skill that we get to learn.
And that's a really critical part of the trauma healing journey is learning how to hold the space for ourselves that we neurobiologically freely give to everybody else.
So therapy is a privilege. And I'm very aware that not everybody has access to it. I also know that mental health and wellness is a human right. So dedicated an extensive amount of time to providing resources and tools that are neurobiologically based to help people heal the experiences of their past.
finding ways to show up in the present moment and do proactive healing in the here and now while building the neural pathways they want for their future. As we honestly can partner with our own brains to create incredible change. And on our YouTube channel, it's Dr. Kate Truitt, which is a Google Health channel.
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