Dr. Lindsay Gibson

They are so afraid that they're going to find themselves

acting in the same way that their parents did with their own children.

And they don't want to do that to their child.

Now, underneath that is a deeper reason, which is they don't feel like they would be emotionally capable of giving that child what they needed.

Because with an

kind of learn that you can't make them any better, that you can't help them with their problems, you can't reassure them.

It's kind of like a person who never is all right.

So they're not entirely sure that they would be able to give a child what they need.

The tragic part of it is if they're coming in for therapy,

and they're examining themselves and they're looking at their history, by definition, that means that they would probably be a better parent than what they experienced.

That is definitely a hallmark.

Yes, self-reflection and also the ability to have your emotions but not be mastered by your emotions.

I just want there to be a feeling between parent and child where they end up being glad to see each other as adults and they have a positive relationship for the rest of their lives.

And that's not going to be done easily.

in a perfect way for anybody, but I wanted parents to feel confident that if they learned about some basic child development and child emotional needs, that they could create the kind of relationship and trust that would result in that long-term good relationship with that adult child down the road.

Yeah.

And there's a reason why it's number one.

Yes.

I'm sure.

And this is just part of being human.