Dr. Micaela

That's a lot of stuff that's already going to be semi pretty draining on me.

So this is not the week that I'm going to say yes to trivia night on Wednesday or Monday or Tuesday.

Maybe I can kind of like feel I really need like fun social time because my other social experiences this week are really stressful and really like performance oriented.

So what I need this week is low key.

And actually, we usually go out for trivia on Wednesday, but trivia is a little too performancy.

So I'm going to suggest we go.

bowling instead or something like that I don't know maybe that's performance too something else fun where you're not going to do a thing that's going to be judged I don't know um

But part of that is really having to be in tune with what you need and respecting yourself, which is hard to do.

And especially for somebody with a combo of autism and ADHD, you're getting a lot of messages that you don't know what you need and that what you think you need is wrong and you just need to fit in better, try harder, et cetera, et cetera.

And so learning how to say, okay,

Am I saying I want to skip tonight because I'm anxious or am I saying I want to skip tonight because I'm totally drained?

And then navigating those waters and then learning over time.

Sometimes, like, for example, there was a networking event that I was supposed to go to and I was like, oh, no, I'm so tired.

I definitely can't do that.

Well, the minute I canceled going to the networking event, I felt better.

And I was like, oh, shit, I should have gone because it was my anxiety that was telling me I was exhausted.

And that I and you'll know that because the second you make the decision, you feel better, like a lot better.

Right.

And sometimes you'll go home and you'll be like, whoa, actually, that wasn't just anxiety.

I was really overwhelmed and I needed a night to myself.