Dr. Nicole LePera

feels a bit, I mean this developmentally, immature.

Because quite literally it was formed at a time where the only thing we could do was lash out before someone else struck us.

The only thing we could do was run away from the situation or flee in our mind through imagination.

The only thing we could do was shut down and not say anything trying to make us invisible.

Because in that flooded moment, again, neurologically or physiologically speaking, the chemicals, the stress response is reacting.

And then the habit is often grounded at an earlier time where we didn't have different capacities, which is my goal, right, is to tune into those moments beginning in our body so that we can learn how to regulate our stress response, not only through daily habits, but practices in the moment.

So that we can regain choice because in those moments we become locked and loaded.

Our body and those old habits are going to dictate what happens next, not our mature, rational mind.

So I often get asked some version of this question, especially for listeners maybe who are not able, much like myself, to even recall what happened in childhood to even map onto, right, why am I?

What happened to create this very familiar way that I am that it feels like it's almost just how I've always been and how I'm meant to be forever?

Because if you've ever heard me share, I can recollect very little of my childhood.

I'm intentionally using that word because the memory of my childhood lived in this very neurotic, very kind of achievement driven person.

So to change, we don't necessarily need to know what created it or even believe, so to speak, that it's not who we always are and are meant to be.

But we can begin now by noticing our daily habits, our relational patterns, how our body feels by taking moments throughout our day to pause, to shift our attention from wherever else it may be focused on, whomever else it might be focused on, and to even just as simply explore, what am I feeling?

Again, checking in with those three areas.

How's my breath?

Am I holding my breath?

Is it very quick?

If I'm holding my breath, can I kind of release that tension and allow myself to breathe?

Our body is naturally breathing.