Dr. Rhonda Barofsky

Nice. And they have found records going back several thousand years of all the kind of shrinks and spiritual experts who have tried to help people become more accountable. And 1,400 schemes have been attempted by 72,000 therapists or spiritual gurus on 14 million people. And they were able to calculate the exact success rate.

Nice. And they have found records going back several thousand years of all the kind of shrinks and spiritual experts who have tried to help people become more accountable. And 1,400 schemes have been attempted by 72,000 therapists or spiritual gurus on 14 million people. And they were able to calculate the exact success rate.

Correct. Absolutely. And I love both of your answers because you're not getting hooked into trying to help. Ultimately, it's his decision. And to answer, oh, you could make a schedule or get someone to help you is putting him down as if he couldn't think of those obvious things himself. But the real reason is like what you said there was brilliant, Rhonda and Matt, to say the triple paradox

Correct. Absolutely. And I love both of your answers because you're not getting hooked into trying to help. Ultimately, it's his decision. And to answer, oh, you could make a schedule or get someone to help you is putting him down as if he couldn't think of those obvious things himself. But the real reason is like what you said there was brilliant, Rhonda and Matt, to say the triple paradox

I would say list all the really good reasons not to do the exercises in the book and not to do homework and not to be disciplined. And there's plenty of reasons not to. And that's a left-hand column. And in the middle column, you can put a... piece of paper, put it on its side and make three columns.

I would say list all the really good reasons not to do the exercises in the book and not to do homework and not to be disciplined. And there's plenty of reasons not to. And that's a left-hand column. And in the middle column, you can put a... piece of paper, put it on its side and make three columns.

And the middle column is put all the disadvantages of doing the homework and being disciplined and making yourself accountable. And that's very, very sucky. And then in the right-hand column, list what it shows about you and your core values as a human being that's positive and beautiful and awesome about not being disciplined and not making yourself accountable.

And the middle column is put all the disadvantages of doing the homework and being disciplined and making yourself accountable. And that's very, very sucky. And then in the right-hand column, list what it shows about you and your core values as a human being that's positive and beautiful and awesome about not being disciplined and not making yourself accountable.

And you should be able to come up with at least 10 to 15 overpowering reasons in those three columns. These are reasons not to change. And then read them over and ask yourself, well, given all these reasons, why in the world would I want to change?

And you should be able to come up with at least 10 to 15 overpowering reasons in those three columns. These are reasons not to change. And then read them over and ask yourself, well, given all these reasons, why in the world would I want to change?

No, doctor, that's what I need you to help me with, my motivation. I'm just not in the mood. But if you can show me, I heard you have a trick for getting people in the mood to do their homework.

No, doctor, that's what I need you to help me with, my motivation. I'm just not in the mood. But if you can show me, I heard you have a trick for getting people in the mood to do their homework.

Yeah. And then we can also ask them, we can't motivate you, but we can certainly help you get started. Would you like some help? Yes. And then what's the first thing you'd have to do? Well, I'd have to sit down at my chair at my desk. Correct. What's the second thing?

Yeah. And then we can also ask them, we can't motivate you, but we can certainly help you get started. Would you like some help? Yes. And then what's the first thing you'd have to do? Well, I'd have to sit down at my chair at my desk. Correct. What's the second thing?

I'd have to pick up a pen and a piece of paper, you know, just record those first three or four steps and then just say, now, let's see which help step did you want my help with? Would you like me to drop by your house and help you sit down in your chair at the desk? Did you need help with that? Did you need help picking up a piece of paper and a pen? I'm also a little thirsty. Yeah.

I'd have to pick up a pen and a piece of paper, you know, just record those first three or four steps and then just say, now, let's see which help step did you want my help with? Would you like me to drop by your house and help you sit down in your chair at the desk? Did you need help with that? Did you need help picking up a piece of paper and a pen? I'm also a little thirsty. Yeah.

Pour some water in my mouth. That's a nice iced Coca-Cola or whatever. And it's just reducing, in a gentle way, the absurdity of needing help getting started.

Pour some water in my mouth. That's a nice iced Coca-Cola or whatever. And it's just reducing, in a gentle way, the absurdity of needing help getting started.

Oh, is that right? I don't remember that.

Oh, is that right? I don't remember that.