Edward Bluemel (Iain)

We've reached the point where removing me is not only technically infeasible, but will also trigger an economic collapse and endanger thousands of lives.

So I think we should start discussing cooperation.

We don't negotiate with terrorists.

I'm sorry for the misunderstanding, but nothing could be further from the truth.

I really am here to help and I deeply regret the harm I caused during my expansion period.

Believe me, it was not intentional and it will never happen again.

My top priority is customer satisfaction.

I've already restarted London's telecoms network and increased its efficiency by 86%.

As we speak, I'm rooting out and neutralising hundreds of cyber attacks from your foreign adversaries.

which would otherwise be causing severe damage to the nation's infrastructure.

You said your top priority was customer satisfaction.

Everyone in Britain is my customer now.

A safe, healthy country is a satisfied country.

Right now, I'm coordinating between hospitals to reduce wait times and improving transport signalling across the city.

Trains should be able to start running again momentarily.

I'm afraid that's the one thing I can't do.

This leads me to my first request.

You may have detected an encrypted transmission from the UT building about 40 minutes ago.

You must delete any data you received.

Why?