Eliza Reid

And there was this kind of, there was this sort of silence at the other end of the line has someone thinking, okay, we're going to have to come over and have a conversation with you.

So I suppose, you know, when it comes to expectations, one of those has to do with what we think a first lady looks like in many senses.

And then there's all these other things that it's meant to be this very sort of supportive role for the genius, the sort of the softer side to his strong male leader.

And

of course, I'm very supportive of my husband, of course, I'm, I'm proud of my husband, but I wouldn't consider being my husband's wife, my defining characteristic as a human being.

So that was some, those are some of the things that I grappled with, as we

embarked on this, this unexpected adventure.

So as you said, it's a very, it's a very gray area in a sense.

Um,

Because as you said, of course, I wasn't an elected official without a job title.

So no, there's no salary, there's no dedicated staff, there's nothing like that.

But when you host incoming heads of state, when there are official visits or big occasions, it is rather expected that the spouse will go along.

And I was happy to do that.

I was excited to do that.

I loved doing it and it was an incredible honor.

And I suppose an advantage in Iceland was that it was also important for me to continue with my paid work.

So while I stopped doing certain projects, I continued, for example, running the Iceland Writers Retreat because that's my professional baby, if you will.

So that was something that was really important for my own identity to think,

Well, why should I quit my job because my husband was elected to a new one?

And to me, it was such an unexpected and wonderful opportunity to have my voice heard, to work to kind of confound expectations, to give women voices, even though we're, quote unquote, merely the spouses there.