Emma Grede

They're worried that this person isn't getting paid enough.

They're worried that that person isn't getting enough rest.

They're worried that this person isn't fulfilled.

And I've recognized that nurturing might be conditioned into us, or maybe it just comes more naturally to us as women.

But I also believe the tendency can be attributed to something else.

putting yourself first surging forward in your career regardless of everything else is simply hard and we don't have enough models of women doing it without misgivings instead of focusing on what you want it becomes actually easier to look around you to find other places to spend your energy and I really want us to stop doing that

Start with yourself.

Putting yourself first isn't selfish, it's actually essential.

This applies when you're building a team too.

And if you're spending all your energy managing other people's feelings about the team, instead of building the best team, you are betraying yourself and your business.

One thing I see a lot, and this drives me totally mental, every time HR comes to me at one of our companies,

to approve an offer for a potential hire.

It's always, always because a man is asking for more and they need sign off to lift the salary band.

He's negotiated his way up to me.

The woman, they take the first offer.

And the female leaders on my team feel badly that as 30 year veterans, they make a lot more than their most junior hires.

They worry that it isn't fair.

They feel uncomfortable with their own compensation and they want to balance it out.

They want to be closer to the group so they don't stand out.

But their experience and their wisdom is unparalleled in the organization.