Erinn Hayes

speaker
209 appearances 1 recordings 1 series first heard May 2026 last heard 14 May

Erinn Hayes’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 1 in all, peaking in May 2026 with 1.

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But I decided I had to see where this journey would take me.
So I blew out my lantern, lay down on my mat, and went to sleep.
Seven winters passed.
One morning, I almost lost it all.
I was doing my daily training of rolling boulders up and down the ravine on an empty stomach.
By now, my arms were hard brown pythons, and I got giddy of how perfect they'd look in the Chantilly sleeve of the lace bolero I planned to wear when I eloped with Emmanuel Macron.
My trainer, Ashley, monitored my progress from the watchtower, shouting death threats to keep me motivated.
Every time you rolled the boulder down into the ravine, you had about a four second window at the bottom where you were completely out of sight of the tower.
That day, with my body crying out from fatigue and hunger, I decided to roll the dice.
I had hidden a meal pellet for exactly this type of opportunity.
Flattening my body against the limestone, I devoured it, luxuriating in its foodie crunchiness.
Then I grabbed the boulder and hurried back up the side of the ravine.
Ashley was waiting for me there.
What were you doing in the ravine?
My thoughts raced wildly, searching for any excuse.
The punishment for disobedience was death.
I was doing extra calf raises.
She smirked at me.
Let's see what leader thinks of that.
Ashley turned and started back for the compound.
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