Evan Roberts

Here's Kirk in Essex County.

Kirk, how are you today?

How did you get that name?

Why did they call you that?

But why, again, you have not answered my question, why do they call you Captain Kirk?

Kirk Rosen.

No, I don't know what you mean.

Yeah, but why Captain Kirk?

No, I'm asking, like you said, hey, everybody called me Captain Kirk.

I'm trying to figure out why.

And now all your friends call you poor bastard?

Kirk, I would call you something else.

And I'm going to be kind to you here because you sound like a nice guy.

And you're in your 60s and I do respect my elders.

But this might be the most selfish phone call since yesterday's most selfish phone call.

Because the New York Yankees won last night 7-0.

Yankee fans want to talk about that.

They're happy about it.

The New York Mets, like moments ago, just won their home opener in a high-scoring game against the Pittsburgh Pirates where they knocked the best pitcher in baseball out after 37 pitches and only two outs.

And you decided that the largest audience on the radio in New York City needed to hear about your nickname.