Glenn Beck

The pitch I used was humanitarian aid for the poor souls living under an oppressive regime that denies global warming. The funds loop through my cousin's startup, which churns out chopsticks made from recycled paper straws. Yeah, the chopsticks won't hold even noodles either, just like the straws. But really, who cares? It's a progressive cause and the people don't really eat anyway.

The pitch I used was humanitarian aid for the poor souls living under an oppressive regime that denies global warming. The funds loop through my cousin's startup, which churns out chopsticks made from recycled paper straws. Yeah, the chopsticks won't hold even noodles either, just like the straws. But really, who cares? It's a progressive cause and the people don't really eat anyway.

The pitch I used was humanitarian aid for the poor souls living under an oppressive regime that denies global warming. The funds loop through my cousin's startup, which churns out chopsticks made from recycled paper straws. Yeah, the chopsticks won't hold even noodles either, just like the straws. But really, who cares? It's a progressive cause and the people don't really eat anyway.

So North Korea gets eco-friendly utensils. My cousin gets a payday and I'm morally superior. Also, you know, the second thing I worked on was I greenlit a new renewable energy project to harness unicorn farts. we're installing fart capture stations in all of the enchanted forests across the country. I know it's visionary, but clean energy from mythical creatures? I mean, it's really following...

So North Korea gets eco-friendly utensils. My cousin gets a payday and I'm morally superior. Also, you know, the second thing I worked on was I greenlit a new renewable energy project to harness unicorn farts. we're installing fart capture stations in all of the enchanted forests across the country. I know it's visionary, but clean energy from mythical creatures? I mean, it's really following...

So North Korea gets eco-friendly utensils. My cousin gets a payday and I'm morally superior. Also, you know, the second thing I worked on was I greenlit a new renewable energy project to harness unicorn farts. we're installing fart capture stations in all of the enchanted forests across the country. I know it's visionary, but clean energy from mythical creatures? I mean, it's really following...

the green instructions from the last administration. No unicorns yet, but we do have a $10 million feasibility study funded, so it's basically a done deal. Big oil is shaking in their boots. Finally, I mandated sensitivity training for all of the staff at the Pentagon on extraterrestrial pronouns. We can assume that aliens...

the green instructions from the last administration. No unicorns yet, but we do have a $10 million feasibility study funded, so it's basically a done deal. Big oil is shaking in their boots. Finally, I mandated sensitivity training for all of the staff at the Pentagon on extraterrestrial pronouns. We can assume that aliens...

the green instructions from the last administration. No unicorns yet, but we do have a $10 million feasibility study funded, so it's basically a done deal. Big oil is shaking in their boots. Finally, I mandated sensitivity training for all of the staff at the Pentagon on extraterrestrial pronouns. We can assume that aliens...

won't use he or she, but that makes us real bigots for assuming anything. But, uh, we just think he or she, it's so earth chauvinist, um, with modules like gender fluid, galactics, one Oh one. Uh, we begun to prepare for first contact, uh, misgender and alien invader. Boom. intergalactic war. So we're just trying to keep the peace here.

won't use he or she, but that makes us real bigots for assuming anything. But, uh, we just think he or she, it's so earth chauvinist, um, with modules like gender fluid, galactics, one Oh one. Uh, we begun to prepare for first contact, uh, misgender and alien invader. Boom. intergalactic war. So we're just trying to keep the peace here.

won't use he or she, but that makes us real bigots for assuming anything. But, uh, we just think he or she, it's so earth chauvinist, um, with modules like gender fluid, galactics, one Oh one. Uh, we begun to prepare for first contact, uh, misgender and alien invader. Boom. intergalactic war. So we're just trying to keep the peace here.

I mean, I know that's only three things I did this week, but, I mean, compared to some other people, I mean, that really counts as five, right, Elon? Right? Right? More in just a second. We're going and going to take a deeper look into... What has the Southern District of New York FBI, what have they been doing? What have they been involved with?

I mean, I know that's only three things I did this week, but, I mean, compared to some other people, I mean, that really counts as five, right, Elon? Right? Right? More in just a second. We're going and going to take a deeper look into... What has the Southern District of New York FBI, what have they been doing? What have they been involved with?

I mean, I know that's only three things I did this week, but, I mean, compared to some other people, I mean, that really counts as five, right, Elon? Right? Right? More in just a second. We're going and going to take a deeper look into... What has the Southern District of New York FBI, what have they been doing? What have they been involved with?

Would you be surprised to know that they are the people that are investigating the assassination attempt of our president?

Would you be surprised to know that they are the people that are investigating the assassination attempt of our president?

Would you be surprised to know that they are the people that are investigating the assassination attempt of our president?

Hello, America. Welcome to the Glenn Beck Program. Really glad that you're here. What is happening with the administration, the DOJ, the FBI, and the Southern District of New York, the office of the FBI? It... We were told yesterday by Pam Bondi and others that that office of the FBI is in rebellion. And they are holding back documents that they have. They have no right to do that.

Hello, America. Welcome to the Glenn Beck Program. Really glad that you're here. What is happening with the administration, the DOJ, the FBI, and the Southern District of New York, the office of the FBI? It... We were told yesterday by Pam Bondi and others that that office of the FBI is in rebellion. And they are holding back documents that they have. They have no right to do that.