Ilana Glazer

oh a needle in the in the base of my fucking spine i don't liked it um but okay i got past that and then um 12 hours later before before i got any like shit to open it up like i opened up to nine centimeters over those 12 hours but wasn't feeling all the pain that would have come if i hadn't gotten the epidural yeah and then it was like seven in the morning we gave me a kiss of pitocin to be like okay let's go to the 10th centimeter and it was like 15 minutes

a needle in the base of my fucking spine I don't like it but okay I got past that and then 12 hours later before I got any like shit to open it up like I opened up to 9 centimeters over those 12 hours but wasn't feeling all the pain that would have come if I hadn't gotten the epidural and then it was like 7 in the morning we gave me a kiss of Pitocin to be like okay let's go to the 10th centimeter and it was like 15 minutes

a needle in the base of my fucking spine I don't like it but okay I got past that and then 12 hours later before I got any like shit to open it up like I opened up to 9 centimeters over those 12 hours but wasn't feeling all the pain that would have come if I hadn't gotten the epidural and then it was like 7 in the morning we gave me a kiss of Pitocin to be like okay let's go to the 10th centimeter and it was like 15 minutes

four pushes so there's like space you know minutes yeah i'm sure you know this um more than i did but like minutes between it's like one minute of a contraction and the opportunity to push but then these breaks of like four minutes in between yeah so it was like four pushes the first push shout out to dr cha dr laura cha fucking bad bitch um first first push she spun my baby um upward

four pushes so there's like space you know minutes yeah i'm sure you know this um more than i did but like minutes between it's like one minute of a contraction and the opportunity to push but then these breaks of like four minutes in between yeah so it was like four pushes the first push shout out to dr cha dr laura cha fucking bad bitch um first first push she spun my baby um upward

four pushes so there's like space you know minutes yeah i'm sure you know this um more than i did but like minutes between it's like one minute of a contraction and the opportunity to push but then these breaks of like four minutes in between yeah so it was like four pushes the first push shout out to dr cha dr laura cha fucking bad bitch um first first push she spun my baby um upward

So her head and like nose were down by my anus, my anus.

And she twisted it up so the nose was up toward the clit, honestly.

And where the head's supposed to be.

And then, you know, got the head out.

And my baby was like, stick her fucking head out of my... I mean, I didn't see it.

I'm just like imagining.

And then got one shoulder out on the second, on the third push out of four.

So her head and like nose were down by my anus, my anus. And she twisted it up so the nose was up toward the clit, honestly. And where the head's supposed to be. And then, you know, got the head out. And my baby was like, stick her fucking head out of my... I mean, I didn't see it. I'm just like imagining. And then got one shoulder out on the second, on the third push out of four.

So her head and like nose were down by my anus, my anus. And she twisted it up so the nose was up toward the clit, honestly. And where the head's supposed to be. And then, you know, got the head out. And my baby was like, stick her fucking head out of my... I mean, I didn't see it. I'm just like imagining. And then got one shoulder out on the second, on the third push out of four.

And then the fourth push, it was like, here we go.

Boom!

And she was like such a little athlete, this like petite...

like woman she's like come on go go you know it's like so I was like I don't do sports this is like miraculous to me it was like really fun it was fucking cool that's so good though I'm glad you had a good experience yeah that's great me too I'm really lucky because maternal care uh varies wildly in this country and black women are the most at risk

And then the fourth push, it was like, here we go. Boom. And she was like such a little athlete, this like petite...